Definitely go out of your way to acknowledge her; Scratch ears and speak to her, and you can try picking her up, but is she wants to get down, don't restrain her. Associate yourself with as much good stuff as possible, and maybe that will help.

But all cats are different, and affectionate to different degrees. Mozart, for example, is a lap cat, but only when he wants to be, and when it's on his terms (and usually when I'm about to go pee, actually). Noodles loves to jump in my lap any chance he gets.

Tinkerbell, now he'll sleep in my lap any time I care to set him there, no matter what he was doing before. He's 16 though, so usually that just means he forgot what he was up to.

Minette loves being rubbed and scratched, but hates being picked up, and isn't a lap cat, at all.

Wobbles? I can't even touch her, but she hates being alone. She has to be right with us, wherever we are. She'll sit with my husband for short stretches as long as he touches only her head, but that usually wears out quickly before she growls and runs. She's just not a sweet cat, at all She's pretty and she talks to us, so we leave her be.