Oh Tracey, I'm so sorry!!! (((HUGS)))) What a heartbreaking decision you have to make!

I absolutely don't think you're a bad mommy, I think you did everything you could to make it work. Sometimes it's just not meant to be. Maybe poor Cirrus would just be happier as a single cat, and the struvite crystal thing doesn't make it easier for him (I can relate to that, since Luna has the same problem).

It would be nice if Cirrus could find another PT home. That way we could all stay in "contact" with him, and you would know he's in a good place.

Kirsten