randi...i'm so sorry...i lost my mom at 63 and my brother at 38, and it was so hard, it still is, there isn't a day that goes by(i'm having trouble typing this, i'm crying so hard) that i don't think of them, memories and photos help a lot and let there be a little comfort in the fact that you now have an angel on your side...i wait tables and when ever i see the number 63(mom) and 38(bro) i think they are with me and it's strange, but i see those numbers an aweful lot...godbless you and fister, have faith and hang in there....