Varga, this was not your fault. Please concentrate on all the good memories you have. Kelly lived a long, happy life. I remember when I was young and my dog Midnight passed away - that night I know I heard her tags on her collar. I woke up and could still hear it and I strained to see her in the dark. It comforted me then and now to think she had come to visit, say everything was ok, and good-bye until we meet again.