Dear Diary,

Lately Blondie keeps saying ...with a big sigh.... that I am all boy. Now, I realize that as a result of that unfortunate surgery I am two bits short of a dollar but --- other than that -- why wouldn't I be all boy ??

I asked what she meant...rolling in the dirt (does she know how refreshing that feels?) Speaking of comfort...

Well that just feels good for my back.....I am NOT showing off!

And if I'm not suppose to drink from it...

Why is it filled with water????

So Dear Diary....what can I do to be more metrosexual???

Worried,

Eddie