Patches,
Dis id Mozart. U pur ting! Wud an awful ting tu endur. Me meowmie useds deze tingz kald "baf wips" or sumfing. Me hate dem! Dey gid me wet, an smellee! But me meowmie saiz dat itz smellz gud! (wut wuld she kno ne wayz!) She saiz iz dose tings or a baf in da tub! I dun like bafs in da tub. I tink dat is not proper fur us kittiez. Me brofer an sisfer hav tu hav dem tu! We all run win we see our meowmie coming wif dose wips! but she katches us and makes us endur it. She saiz we smell sooo gud afterwurdz... Az IF we didn smell gud befur dose tings!

And pur Peanut! tu hav ur pictur taken while enduring such an awful ting! Me meowmie waz gunna do dat tu me, but she saiz her kamera "baterees" was "dead" wut ever dat meanz!