Quote Originally Posted by cassiesmom View Post
Dear O.,

You texted to ask if I wanted to meet you for breakfast. You already chewed me out for being slow to respond to your texts and I promised to try to do better. I replied with what I thought was a clear answer and you threw it right back at me again. I felt like I was getting resistance from you by saying "I'm sorry, I can't". I was hurt when you said I'm not doing anything. I don't want to disclose to you how I spend each day. I also don't want to spend $15 on breakfast right now- that's an expense I'd rather not incur. So please, I need you to accept "I can't" as a complete answer for the time being. Don't throw it back at me, because that puts me on the defensive. I'll let you know when I can afford to eat out again.

Thank you for understanding,
Your friend who's watching every dollar these days
Dear O.,

Once bitten, twice shy. That's me. I agreed to go with you based on our conversation from last summer and my promise to try to do better. You criticized me about so many things I don't even know where to start. Hair, make-up and fashion. There's a lot about me that calls attention in negative ways- my gait, my weight. I'm a plain Jane because I don't seek any more attention than that. Having just been the center of attention for a few months, I have now decided that I don't want to be in that position anymore. I'm perfectly comfortable with my choices of hair style, dress and make-up. I wish I had a nickel for every "You should..." I heard during our conversation. You don't know about another conversation I'd had the previous day that had already put a big nick in my self-esteem. So I felt pretty awful when I got home. Then you threw it to me again by text because you objected to the choice I made about how to spend the evening. Sorry, not sorry about that one.

Once again I need you to accept "I can't" as a complete answer. It's been almost a year since we had this conversation the first time and I am not willing to discuss it any further. You might not hear from me for awhile until I have healed from this. You claimed you weren't saying these things to hurt me, but I'm having a very hard time believing that.

Please respect my silence.