Pat, I am so sorry that you are having a hard time. Grief is such an unpredictable and seemingly cruel emotion, it will show up unexpectedly, and/or linger.
It is important that you take care of yourself, but also allow yourself to grieve however long it takes.
Poppy is there with you, and she will help you through those difficult times, and she will also remind you of all the unconditional love and joy you two shared.