I know how you feel, I really suck at math. I feel stupid all the time and it's preventing me from going back to school. (Only with me it's a concentration issue so I pretty much suck at everything lol) I really regret putting it off. The longer I wait the harder it gets. So don't let this distract from what you want. Try not to beat yourself up over it, you definitely aren't stupid. Just keep at it, it's something you really want then you will get there. Did you ever think about maybe getting a math tutor just to help you a little bit?