I learned the hard way that you can't defrost a loaf of bread in its plastic bag in the microwave...

The bag caught on fire. Luckily John was standing right next to it.

I've also had a few "idiot loads" involving soda and boxes splitting and cans going all over the place.

I think the most irritating bonehead stunt I've pulled on myself is washing my last $20 until payday. The bill was a total loss, too. I think I about had a meltdown lol.