I was going to suggest the warm wet washcloth on the eyes as well. I have an FIV+ kitty and he gets gunky eyes, gunky ears, you name it.

I also had a foster kitty who had issues because he had the condition where his eye lashes turned inside to scratch his eyes. He had surgery but it wasn't done really well, and he still had issues with his eyes getting gunky and irritated.

I'd definitely seek another opinion about your cat. I know money is tight, I understand when you have medical problems yourself, but I also know that I wouldn't want my pet to keep suffering. I'm sure he's extremely uncomfortable with his eyes constantly being all gunked up, and you did say it seemed like he was in pain.

Can you see if there is a vet in your area who does payment plans, or one that is not part of a huge group of vets. I've found that the smaller vets don't charge as much, and many times they can work out payment plans and things like that, where as the large vet "companies" can't/won't allow it.

I hope you can find some help for your kitty. Please don't stay away just because people were hesitant about your motives. We do get a lot of "trolls" here on PT who just want to cause trouble. Hope to hear of some good news about your kitty. Please keep us updated if you can. Take care of yourself as well.