I'm so much like you, in the sense that I was confused at the beginning about what to call my in-laws, and resorted to calling them nothing. That eventually became a problem, because when I would talk to my father-in-law on the phone, I didn't know how to ask him if I could talk to my mother-in-law. Calling her by her name would be considered rude and unacceptable in my culture, so that was a no no. Calling her 'hubby's mom' would once again be rude. I couldn't say, "May I please speak to the lady?" Even "May I please talk to my mother-in-law" sounds strange. SO...in the end, I gave in, decided that calling someone 'else' Mom and Dad was not going to kill me, and just started calling them what my husband calls them. He calls his mom and dad "Ammi" and "Abba"...which is not what I call my parents, so I still felt there was a difference, and I wasn't calling them the same thing as my parents.......so it worked for me. It also made them happy, and made them feel more like I'm like their daughter, so I guess its worth it.

My hubby also calls my parents what I call them "Mama" and "Baba". My mom didn't like when he called them nothing (he also went through a 'what should I call them?' phase like me), and I understood my mom's feelings. That's another reason why I started calling my in-laws "Ammi and Abba". I felt that if its disrespectful for my husband to call my parents nothing, its disrespectful for me to call his parents nothing. So together, we both started referring to our in-laws as our moms and dads, and eventually, it just increased the bond between us. I WANTED my husband to refer to my parents as his parents, so I guess I just had to expect the same from myself.