Well Malone I don't believe a word of this. I think someone surely broke into your home while your humans were away and framed you. I think it must have been the notorious *gift bag bandit* or some other evil person. Nosiree Malone, it couldn't have been sweet adorable you.

Anna, I am so sorry. I don't have any suggestions because it seems like you are doing exactly what I would do in the same situation. I hope this will pass. Dogs..... ya gotta love 'em!