I know exactly what you are going through. I have TWO with dental problems. Dexter had a cleaning a few months ago, but still has problems with dry food causing him pain. My vet said that his teeth themselves looked too good for her to want to remove them. It's the GUMS causing the problems! We are just in a "wait and see" mode with him. So far he is eating enough wet food to maintain his weight.

Boots, my very shy feral boy, has awful mouth pain. When I took him to the vet, the new young one saw him. She and the tech couldn't handle his feralness and he ended up in the garbage can hiding. I had taken him at the same time as Dexter, so he remained in the garbage can while Dexter was examined. *sigh* I was the one who scruffed him to get him out of the can and back in his carrier. All that "could be" done for Boots at that time was to give him Clindamycin in his wet food. He does eat his wet food fairly good, but he's still not eating enough to maintain a good weight. He is still very thin and he's so darned skiddish about eating, that I have to plan exactly how and when and where I put his plate. It is VERY frustrating caring for Boots! It's just a matter of time before I have to take him back to my vet .... next time will be the owner, with years of experience. My vet's office has hired so many new vets (trying to gradually retire, I think) that I hardly ever get to actually see him! I hate it, because he is the one I started with!
I'm guessing that they will have to knock Boots out some just to really examine him next time.

Good luck getting the funds together for Amber. I know how that is too ... especially right now. I've had two vet visits in the past week, for abscesses from a mean tortie!