Dear Santa,

This is your old friend Zsa-Zsa speaking. You do not need me to tell you how important i have been to my family this past year, working so hard to keep everything running smoothly. This Christmas, I want Sheba and lots of surprises. And, seeing as i am a senior citizen now, i would like to lay down a few rules...

1. When you arrive in the kitchen, do not wake me, for i have had a very tiring day sorting out the house and making sure that all bows are suitably pulled from the Christmas tree. A cat needs her rest.

2. When you are eating that thing you call a 'mince pie', do not drop any crumbs on the floor, they get stuck in between my toes and that is most inconvenient as it tastes horrible when licked off.

3. Please, no reindeer allowed in the house at all times. The last time that happened Rudolf had to be rushed into casualty after he fell onto my claws. My whole paw stunk for a month.

4. Please deposit the presents in a convenient place ready for inspection when i wake up. Any presents that fall below standard will be officially dragged into the litterbox and left to rot.

5. Do not move any items that do not need to be moved. You could be disrupting the points of my daily routine by doing so.

6. Oh, and whatever you do, DO NOT give any presents to those little rodents Foxy and Tia Maria. They are foul, smelly and stupid little beings and i don't know what my owners see in them. They do not deserve anything, I'M the main pet.

Just follow these simple guidlines and you'll have a merry, scratch-free Christmas!
LOL!!!