Oh, Michelle {{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}. So many of us have gone there before you, and can speak from experience. To this day, I suffer from the guilt of putting Binx to sleep, and that was nearly 1.5 years ago. It is easier today, much, but, it still hurts.

What you are feeling is so **normal**, so hard to deal with, so heartwrenching, and, psychologically speaking, a way for you to remain 'connnected' to your baby girl. A part of our psyche doesn't want to let go, and wants to stay in that moment, as painful as it is, because it keeps us connnected to our loss. You did the right thing by Lilith. The hardest thing to do, but, the right thing. Physical life is so temporary, even more so for the animals that we love. Time is your only friend right now, and I can't tell you when it becomes easier- as it is different for each one of us- but, it will become easier.

Cry. Cry, and then cry some more. It is cleansing. Cry for Lilith's life being cut way too short, for your loss, for your heartache. But, know in your heart, as we know in ours, you gave Lilith the ultimate gift a human can give its companion- you let her pass to the RB without suffering, and with much love. We all should be so lucky when it is our time to go.

Johanna