Feeding tube removed from woman after 13 years

[catland]

Just over a year ago my husband and I lost a friend to lung cancer. The cancer had spread throughout his body and was unmerciful. Finally, they had to crank up the pain medication so high that he just spent his last days drifting in and out of conciousness. He no longer ate, and he wasn't given a feeding tube so he did starve himself to death while the cancer ate away at him.

In his case though, he had many coherent months to plan this. He made the choice to not receive a feeding tube. The only liquids that he received were in the form of the liquids in his pain medication IV.

In his case, there really was no reason to live any longer. A feeding tube would have been cruel, not kind. I'm glad he made the decision that he did and that his family members respected his decision when he was helpless to their whims.

[stacwase]

Catland, do you think he suffered from the starvation or that it helped him to pass peacefully?

[Soledad]

I suggest everyone who's interested in this case go here to see video of Terri reacting and interacting.

It seems to me that she is aware of her surroundings and not totally braindead or a complete vegetable.

[catland]

Thank-you Soledad - that does change things. How tragic for her and her parents. How awful that she's been denied therapy that could improve her quality of life.

Stacwase - in my friends case, he knew he was dying. He had gone through radiation and chemo and it extended his life but never eradicated the cancer. (unfortunately, he was not diagnosed with cancer until it had already spread) He had developed a new tumor on his spine which could not receive radiation treatement, and that was when they had to increase his pain medication to a staggering degree because he was suffering so much. When they did this he lost his appetite, but it was the first time he had been truely pain-free in months, so yes, I think the trade-off was worth it.

[2kitties]

But if she is aware, then doesn't that make it even worse to go on living? I'm certain that I would not want to live and be aware inside a body that is vegetative. To me, the fact that she is aware and can comprehend makes it all the more reasonable to allow her to pass.

But that is my opinion for how I would want MYSELF treated. It doesn't mean I project my opinion on her. But in my heart, my own personal opinion is that the idea to keep her alive like this is selfish of her parents. They may not see it that way, but I believe they are keeping her alive for them, not for her.

And they keep bringing up the man's girlfriend.... well, he's been a "widower" for 13 years. I don't think a girfriend is out of the question.

[Soledad]

Look at the video and tell me that she seems unresponsive.

I'm for allowing people the right to die, don't get me wrong, but this particular case is so odd. Keep in mind that when Theresa said she didn't want life support she was referring to a family member who was hooked up to a ventilator, motionless and asleep the whole time. She only uses a feeding tube and could have learned how to swallow if her husband had paid for therapy.

[wolfsoul]

Originally posted by 2kitties
But if she is aware, then doesn't that make it even worse to go on living? I'm certain that I would not want to live and be aware inside a body that is vegetative. To me, the fact that she is aware and can comprehend makes it all the more reasonable to allow her to pass.

That's what I'd think too. It would be terrible to be stuck in a body that couldn't respond to anything. You'd have to endure people bathing you, people cleaning up after you. I would be mortified.

[micki76]

I'm sorry, but watching those videos is extremely depressing. After watching them, I am certian that if I am EVER in any state similar to this that I want to be killed/starved/murdered/put out of my misery.

No one in my family had better allow me to exist like that. That is no where near living. Hell, thats barely an existance. And though I don't believe it's possible, I would find a way to haunt my family if they did that to me for 13 years.

I am making an appointment with an attoney for the week that I'm on vacation. I don't intend for this to ever be my "life".

[Soledad]

I can certainly understand wanting that. I wouldn't want that life for myself, either.

But the court is euthanizing her based on the fact that she is supposedly "unresponsive to her environment." Clearly, that is not the case.

It's a very tough call.

[2kitties]

Originally posted by Soledad
Look at the video and tell me that she seems unresponsive.

I'm for allowing people the right to die, don't get me wrong, but this particular case is so odd. Keep in mind that when Theresa said she didn't want life support she was referring to a family member who was hooked up to a ventilator, motionless and asleep the whole time. She only uses a feeding tube and could have learned how to swallow if her husband had paid for therapy.

I understand your point Soledad. But would you really want to be kept alive inside your body because you can swallow? I mean, doesn't the fact that she is awake inside there mean she is living in a tormenting limbo. It would for me. I just find it so very sad.

[Soledad]

I'm looking at it from a legal standpoint. I think the parents have a point.

Their point is that her quality of life could have and still might possibly change if she's allowed actual care and rehabilitation. Is it not suspect that her husband refused it from day one??

[2kitties]

Originally posted by Soledad
Is it not suspect that her husband refused it from day one??

sadly, that is true.

[momoffuzzyfaces]

We went through something similar with my father in 1999. He had Parkinson's and Alzheimer's. After a series of strokes, he was taken from the hospital back to his nursing home. My step mother made the decision to take him off the feeding tube. I had a hard time accepting that they were going to let him starve to death. He was in a coma but would move and mumble. He had always recovered before. He seemed to respond to my voice where he wouldn't to others. If I had been allowed to have anything to say, I would have given him longer to recover from his stroke. It was only a matter of days for him before they took him off life support. He was able to swallow jello if someone fed him. My step mother said he had signed a no life support form. I really don't know if he did or not. I just feel that blood kin deserve some say in these matters. We've known them and loved them a lot longer than a wife or husband. Blood is thicker than ink on a document.

For myself, I don't want to be kept alive on life support either but do want a reasonable chance to recover.

[2kitties]

This is completely unrelated, I know. But I will share that my family (my mother and her brothers particularly) have made the decision to allow my grandmother to starve when the time comes. She hs dementia in the advanced stages and will no longer eat. The alternative is a feeding tube and they have decided a feeding tube is something my grandmother would never want. They feel is compromises her dignity. Why did they make that difficult decision? Because she has been a prisoner over teh past decade of her body. Her mind is gone and her body continues to survive. She is aware of her surrounding and can communicate- but she has no mental function in terms of recognizing, knowing herself or others, etc. It is in its most advanced stages now.
So, in the coming year, she will litterally not be able to eat. She will be medicated so that her death will be peaceful and painless. But, yes, it will be essentially starvation. Sad, but she would never have wanted a feeding tube. I've seen it in her sister, and it was awful.

My grandmother is and was a strong and dignified woman. She would want the same for her death. Anything else, my mother believes, would be selfish and wrong.

[catland]

moff - that's so sad. I'm so sorry for your loss. My parents are still alive and married to each other. I honestly cannot imagine what it would be like to have my dad marry another woman only to have her have the final say. Although I also cannot imagine what it would be like if something were to happen to my husband and his relatives were to try to get me to make decisions that I didn't want. It sounds like a terrible situation.


2k - what we sometimes forget is that dying is a part of living and that when a person stops eating it can be their way of telling the world "I'm done, I'm tired, and its time for me to go". I think your family is doing the right thing. People have been allowed to die without feeding tubes all this time. Just because we can do something doesn't mean we should do something.