If your cat was dying, would you go on vacation? :-(

[pomtzu]

Sorry to sidetrack - but pom, would an opinion from your vet help you decide whether or not to go for the visit? You and I and all of us know our babies better than anyone...but it's just a thought.
(

Not sidetracking Kirsten - just an explanation here.

I value the vet's opinion, but that wouldn't ease my mind any. Myndi has kidney disease (not failure) and is on a special diet, and also has a heart murmur but it's stable and she takes no meds for it. She would be well taken care of by the family, but would be without humans around all day while son and DIL are working. She needs to eat, but both pups usually go on a hunger strike in protest for at least the first couple days that I am gone. So between the kidney issue, and the GI bleed that she had last year, not eating and being stressed out would not be good for her. Now you see why I am very hesitant to go and leave her.


And Kirsten - don't feel that you have betrayed your friend by saying anything here. Like CP said - we don't even know her. However, we all know you, and how much you value the health and well being of your girls, and your concern for other people's furkids too. We all stand behind your beliefs, and feel just as you do.

[Asiel]

No way would I ever leave a sick pet for a vacation. And the thought of having it pts so she can go is appalling to me. I guess I'm a real sucker for my dogs but I could never even go away for a whole day and leave a sick dog...been there, Everything got cancelled and we stayed home. I can barely handle watching a sick dog when I'm at home, let alone think of leaving on vacation.
I think your friend needs to do some heavy thinking on her decision....I really feel sorry for the poor cat.

[Kirsten]

Thank you everyone for your kind words! Means a lot to me! I'm thinking about that poor kitty all the time!

Last night, my friend sent a message to my cellphone, telling me that it has started raining and that the kitty came back home, and that he "was fine" WTF! Guess it's these typical ups and downs that come with these fatal viral diseases. The day before yesterday, she told me that no one was allowed to touch him because he was so very much in pain. According to the vet, his brain is affected which leads to occasional limpness and stiffness, and sometimes he can barely walk, or get up. Sounds like nerve damage to me. And now she's telling herself "he's fine", probably only to be able to leave with a clear conscience! At least the kitty is inside now (I hope he still is!), so it will be easier for the neighbor to look after him!

And Kirsten - don't feel that you have betrayed your friend by saying anything here. Like CP said - we don't even know her. However, we all know you, and how much you value the health and well being of your girls, and your concern for other people's furkids too. We all stand behind your beliefs, and feel just as you do.

Thanks for saying that. Yes, I would probably try to stop the world for Luna and Lily if needed!
And I can see your dilemma re. Myndi very well. Hard to tell, but I probably wouldn't leave her then. Can't your brother come to visit you instead? Just a thought...

Not only would I not go, there was a time (or two) I didn't go to the hospital when I should have and mine were all healthy.

I understand that. When I applied for disability pension this year, I feared that they would send me to a rehabilitation clinic (which they do a lot here for chronical ill people). I would have refused to do that because I wouldn't want to leave my girls for 4 or 6 weeks! They're not ill, but 11 and 8 years old, and you never know how much time there is left, and I wouldn't want to waste any of that time by being separated from them. Also, I know they would be unhappy without me. Last year, when I had my rehabilitation after my back surgery, I went to a day clinic, driving 80 kilometres every day for the therapies, just to stay with my girls.


Another update: She just called me to give me the latest news. He's at the vet's now, running a fever of 106°F; he's getting infusions now and will stay at the vet's office as long as she's away. Glad she decided to take him in, at least he'll be looked after now and will get appropriate care.

[phesina]

Oh, thank GOD that he's at least at the vet's where he'll be getting the medical treatment he needs and will be looked after hopefully with love and kindness.

[happylabs]

I have a whole different thought on this and you all are going to hate me but "the cat is so miserable he can barely walk". I would have him PTS now. He obviously has no quality of life. Why prolong it? He will not get better, correct? It is the humane thing to do.

Yes, your friend is a horrible person.

[Medusa]

My belief has always been "People first" but we've got to draw the line somewhere and this is definitely the place to draw that line. I could never leave a sick pet behind while I went on vacation. When my son and I went to England, my Fur Posse were all relatively healthy. Boo and Pidge were on meds but they were old and I was concerned but since they were doing so well and my cat sitter was a vet tech, I felt they were in good hands. However, later, I had my plane ticket to go to CA for Thanksgiving to see my son and to cook Tday dinner for many of his friends. By that time, Pidge had passed and Boo was not doing well at all. I bought cancellation insurance and told my son point blank that if I felt uneasy about leaving Boo that I would cancel my trip. My son is the one who suggested that I do that b/c he feels the same way about my Fur Posse and Boo was his favorite. Even his friends knew that there was no way I'd leave that cat to possibly die w/o me holding him and telling him how much I loved him. How could I possibly have had a good time knowing that he was sick and wanting me there w/him? (As it turned out, Boo passed before Thanksgiving.)

As for your friend, some people just do not feel about their pets the way we do. I'm glad that her cat is at least getting good care at the vet's and if he does pass, it will be w/people who will give him attention. When you talk to your friend next, perhaps tell her why she should have been w/him, that our pets love us and need us at that time more than ever, that if they do pass, it makes it so much easier for them; they're less frightened and they leave us knowing that they were loved. Besides that, it's our responsibility as pet owners to see them through illness no matter the outcome.

If possible, please let us know how the little kitty is doing, Kirsten. (((HUGS)))

[Kirsten]

Oh, thank GOD that he's at least at the vet's where he'll be getting the medical treatment he needs and will be looked after hopefully with love and kindness.

Yes, I was glad to hear that, too. Much better than being alone at home, or - even worse - somewhere outside.

I have a whole different thought on this and you all are going to hate me but "the cat is so miserable he can barely walk". I would have him PTS now. He obviously has no quality of life. Why prolong it? He will not get better, correct? It is the humane thing to do.

No, I don't hate you at all for that thought. I was actually thinking the same. It's the second time within 8 days that he had a fever of 106°F, which makes me believe that the virus is out of control. When my friend called yesterday, she said he'll be fine after the infusions, but IMO it's naive to think so.

How could I possibly have had a good time knowing that he was sick and wanting me there w/him?

Exactly!! If one of my girls would be that sick, or even dying, I would be crying all the time and would have no single moment of peace. But's it's probably like you said: Some people do not feel about their pets the way we do (here at PT).

I'll keep you updated!

[Randi]

There's only one answer to this question... OF COURSE NOT!!!

[DriftyAlison0]

I would still go on vacation, but I will ether stay home or find a hotel/motel close by that allows cats and bring the cat and the other cats with me.

[Marigold2]

Is this a vacation that is paid for and cannot be refunded? If you have dished out $5000.00 for a holiday that you have perhaps waited years to take one has to enter this into the thought process.
If this sweet kitty is in pain or unhappy perhaps it is time for her to go to the Rainbow Bridge.
There are just so many different variables here. If my kitty was sick I would stay home, if kitty was dying I would have her put to sleep.
I would not forfit a $5000.00 vacation for a dying kitty.
I hope that does not sound horrible.
I love animals so................ but I am very practical as well.

[aTailOf2Kitties]

My very old dog took a turn for the worse a few days before I was going on vacation for 2 weeks. Since she was already on medications for all of her ailments and nothing else could have been done, I helped her across the bridge the day before I left. I kept her as comfortable as possible for another day until everyone who knew her could say their goodbyes. She crossed the bridge after being given fond farewells from her loved ones and I left for Florida knowing her tired old body was peacefully residing in my parents' back yard.

If she hadn't gotten worse, my parents were going to keep her at their house. But since she got to the point where she didn't have the strength to get up any more, I was not going to make my poor mother carry a 40-pound elkhound outside several times a day.

So I guess you could say I was going to leave an old dog in declining health behind, but once I saw she was definitely getting weaker with little hope of improvement, I decided not to prolong her life.

Was that selfish of me? She wasn't necessarily dying but I guess you might could say I had her PTS just so I could go on vacation and not have to burden my parents with my ailing pet.

[mrspunkysmom]

I was faced with a similar situation several years back. My mom's Scottie Fala was so sick, she had to carry her out to potty or just change her sheets several times a day. Mom had to go on vacation that was already paid for and had asked me to pet-sit Fala and the cats.

I knew that when I got in and after she had left, I would take the poor dog to be PTS. I fully expected her to not talk to me for years, but the dog was miserable. But I did not tell her this. Anyway, she had already had Fala PTS when I arrived the day before her departure. She had difficulty with the concept of mercy and euthanasia; it's a Catholic thing. Anyway, her excuse was that she couldn't leave that for me and that Fala was her responsibility.

I think that vacations can be refunded or rescheduled for the death of a close family member, esp if you have insurance. Sadly a family pet probably does not count as a family member.

[Kirsten]

I understand that there are many things to consider when the trip is already paid, and cannot be refunded, or if it's something you've been planning for years.

But this is just a visit with some relatives of her sons' dad (her ex). Nothing was booked, nothing paid for; and it's not that she hasn't seen these people for a long time, she already met them at Easter, which is not too long ago. There would have been absolutely no problem to cancel - or postpone - the trip.

[Cataholic]

I was faced with a similar situation several years back. My mom's Scottie Fala was so sick, she had to carry her out to potty or just change her sheets several times a day. Mom had to go on vacation that was already paid for and had asked me to pet-sit Fala and the cats.

I knew that when I got in and after she had left, I would take the poor dog to be PTS. I fully expected her to not talk to me for years, but the dog was miserable. But I did not tell her this.

I am glad to see that you did not have any input here. I could never express in words the absolute fury I would feel if someone ever did something like this to me.

[mrspunkysmom]

I am glad to see that you did not have any input here. I could never express in words the absolute fury I would feel if someone ever did something like this to me.

I can understand your feelings, but you have to trust the person in the room.

I had told her a few weeks before that the dog was miserable and should be euthanized, but she couldn't let go and viewed euthanasia as murder. He could not walk or control his bowels. She hand fed him so he could survive. Not thrive just survive. She had adopted him a few years before and did not realize that his hips were bad or how old he was.

I was surprised that she had the dog PTS. And I was willing to endure her fury and upset at me to spare the dog any more pain. I suspect she knew how I felt and wanted the decision to be hers. I swore after Tillie passed after a few years of misery. I would not let another animal suffer needlessly.