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Thread: I got this in an email this morning called, "The Older Crowd...

  1. #1
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Ploss's Halfway House for Homeless Cats
    Posts
    18,311

    I got this in an email this morning called, "The Older Crowd...

    THE OLDER CROWD

    A distraught senior citizen
    Phoned her doctor's office.
    'Is it true,' she wanted to know,
    'that the medication
    You prescribed has to be taken
    For the rest of my life?'
    'Yes, I'm afraid so,' the doctor told her.
    There was a moment of silence
    Before the senior lady replied,
    I'm wondering, then,
    Just how serious is my condition
    Because this prescription is marked
    'NO REFILLS'..'
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    An older gentleman was
    On the operating table
    Awaiting surgery
    And he insisted that his son,
    A renowned surgeon,
    Perform the operation.
    As he was about to get the anesthesia,
    He asked to speak to his son
    'Yes, Dad, what is it? '
    'Don't be nervous, son;
    Do your best
    And just remember,
    If it doesn't go well,
    If something happens to me,
    Your mother
    Is going to come and
    Live with you and your wife....'
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Aging:
    Eventually you will reach a point
    When you stop lying about your age
    And start bragging about it.
    ---------------------------------
    (My favorite)
    The older we get,
    The fewer things
    Seem worth waiting in line for.
    ---------------------------------

    Some people
    Try to turn back their odometers.
    Not me!
    I want people to know 'why'
    I look this way.
    I've traveled a long way
    And some of the roads weren't paved.
    ********************

    When you are dissatisfied
    And would like to go back to youth,
    Think of Algebra.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    You know you are getting old when
    Everything either dries up or leaks.
    -------------------------------

    One of the many things
    No one tells you about aging
    Is that it is such a nice change
    From being young.

    Ah, being young is beautiful,
    But being old is comfortable.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    First you forget names,
    Then you forget faces.
    Then you forget to pull up your zipper.
    It's worse when
    You forget to pull it down.
    ---------------------------------

    Long ago
    When men cursed
    And beat the ground with sticks,
    It was called witchcraft...
    Today, it's called golf.

    Rest In Peace Casey (Bubba Dude) Your paw print will remain on my heart forever. 12/02
    Mollie Rose, you were there for me through good times and in bad, from the beginning.Your passing will leave a hole in my heart.We will be together "One Fine Day". 1994-2009
    MooShoo,you left me too soon.I wasn't ready.Know that you were my soulmate and have left me broken hearted.I loved you like no other. 1999 - 2010See you again "ONE FINE DAY"
    Maya Linn, my heart is broken. The day your beautiful blue eyes went blind was the worst day of my life.I only wish I could've done something.I'll miss your "premium" purr and our little "conversations". 1997-2013 See you again "ONE FINE DAY"

    DO NOT BUY WHILE SHELTER ANIMALS DIE!!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    Concordia Lutheran Home in Cabot
    Posts
    7,815
    Quote Originally Posted by moosmom View Post
    THE OLDER CROWD

    A distraught senior citizen
    Phoned her doctor's office.
    'Is it true,' she wanted to know,
    'that the medication
    You prescribed has to be taken
    For the rest of my life?'
    'Yes, I'm afraid so,' the doctor told her.
    There was a moment of silence
    Before the senior lady replied,
    I'm wondering, then,
    Just how serious is my condition
    Because this prescription is marked
    'NO REFILLS'..'
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    An older gentleman was
    On the operating table
    Awaiting surgery
    And he insisted that his son,
    A renowned surgeon,
    Perform the operation.
    As he was about to get the anesthesia,
    He asked to speak to his son
    'Yes, Dad, what is it? '
    'Don't be nervous, son;
    Do your best
    And just remember,
    If it doesn't go well,
    If something happens to me,
    Your mother
    Is going to come and
    Live with you and your wife....'
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Aging:
    Eventually you will reach a point
    When you stop lying about your age
    And start bragging about it.
    ---------------------------------
    (My favorite)
    The older we get,
    The fewer things
    Seem worth waiting in line for.
    ---------------------------------

    Some people
    Try to turn back their odometers.
    Not me!
    I want people to know 'why'
    I look this way.
    I've traveled a long way
    And some of the roads weren't paved.
    ********************

    When you are dissatisfied
    And would like to go back to youth,
    Think of Algebra.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    You know you are getting old when
    Everything either dries up or leaks.
    -------------------------------

    One of the many things
    No one tells you about aging
    Is that it is such a nice change
    From being young.

    Ah, being young is beautiful,
    But being old is comfortable.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    First you forget names,
    Then you forget faces.
    Then you forget to pull up your zipper.
    It's worse when
    You forget to pull it down.
    ---------------------------------

    Long ago
    When men cursed
    And beat the ground with sticks,
    It was called witchcraft...
    Today, it's called golf.
    Donna, I loved ALL of them! As a matter of fact, I printed them out for the activity people to look at and use. I especially liked the one about forgetting to use your zipper!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Methuen, MA; USA
    Posts
    17,105
    Thanks for a smile with my morning coffee!
    .

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    SE USA
    Posts
    18,443
    Me too! Thanks for the laughs with my morning coffee! These are great!

    Special Needs Pets just leave bigger imprints on your heart!

  5. #5
    good ones!!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Westchester Cty, NY
    Posts
    8,738
    Long ago
    When men cursed
    And beat the ground with sticks,
    It was called witchcraft...
    Today, it's called golf.

    ...my favorite!
    I've been finally defrosted by cassiesmom!
    "Not my circus, not my monkeys!"-Polish proverb

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Location
    Iowa
    Posts
    2,362
    I loved these. So cute and so true.


  8. #8
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    Concordia Lutheran Home in Cabot
    Posts
    7,815
    Quote Originally Posted by smokey the elder View Post
    Long ago
    When men cursed
    And beat the ground with sticks,
    It was called witchcraft...
    Today, it's called golf.

    ...my favorite!
    I've seen PLENTY of that in my tenure as a groundskeeper at Longue Vue Club golf course!

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    8,166
    Quote Originally Posted by smokey the elder View Post
    Long ago
    When men cursed
    And beat the ground with sticks,
    It was called witchcraft...
    Today, it's called golf.

    ...my favorite!
    Mine to. It kinda reminds me of me.
    I'm copying this lot, and sending it to all the over 25's I know

  10. #10
    I laughed out loud thanks.

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Midwest
    Posts
    3,928
    Blog Entries
    3
    wombat, I am sure glad I am only 24 1/2 years old at heart. I am just bragging about my age.



    They are all so true it hurt inside & outside when I was laughing now I need to go take some aspirin, change my depends, & take a nap.

  12. #12
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Location
    Sweet Home Alabama (ZULU -6)
    Posts
    4,269
    I can relate to most of these,

    Bonny
    They are all so true it hurt inside & outside when I was laughing now I need to go take some aspirin, change my depends, & take a nap.
    You really captured the essence of this post.
    “You live and you learn, but if you never learn, at least you are still living.”
    — Unknown

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Seward's Folly, AK
    Posts
    3,679
    I now have something to look forward too. Thanks.
    I have a HUGE SIG!!!!



    My Dogs. Erp the Cat.

    Quote Originally Posted by Thomas Jefferson
    Tyranny is defined as that which is legal for the government but illegal for the citizenry.

  14. #14
    Join Date
    Oct 2006
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    8,166
    Quote Originally Posted by Bonny View Post
    wombat, I am sure glad I am only 24 1/2 years old at heart. I am just bragging about my age.
    I already know that.
    Your hubby sent me your latest pic last night.


  15. #15
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
    Location
    Midwest
    Posts
    3,928
    Blog Entries
    3
    How dare he! But yup that is me. Only I don't have teeth anymore.

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