Vent

[K9karen]

I'm so sorry, Audrey. I know your situation is very painful for you. If your mom is always complaining when you call, she might be in dire need of attention. I'm sure she loves you very much, and as they say, "we always hurt the ones we love". Your mom just may be releasing her frustrations on you. Don't forget, strangers don't really want to hear one's problems, so she feels she can take her feelings out on you, her daughter. So when you look at it that way, it may ease your pain.
I had an awesome relationship with my mom, but there were times she said things to me that took my breath away! During the time I home cared her and she got sicker and sicker, things got worse and worse, but I know she loved me with all her heart. In fact, minutes before she passed, she yelled at me! But I didn't take it personally. She was who she was.
I'm so thrilled you have such a super dad to turn to. There were times I could only ask my dad for advise and comfort. Just different personalities. It's obvious you love your mom. We all need to vent and I'm glad you have your PT family to turn to.

[Cataholic]

Audrey,
I am sorry you are experiencing this with your mom. Something that helps me sometimes deal with the way people treat me is to remember- the way someone treats you is a reflection of THEM, and not of YOU.

Your mom treats you this way largely because she can, and there is a deficiency in HER life that makes her this way. While she is your mother, I am not so sure I would encourage you to have a relationship with you. It seems to keep you in turmoil. It isn't something you are doing right/wrong that makes her react the way she does, and you cannot 'fix' or change the way she interacts with you. You can, however, change your situation by staying clear of her, for much of the time. Just cause someone is 'family', they aren't entitled to treat you poorly.

And, I would not encourage you to educate your mom on any of her apparent deficiencies- what a way to fuel the fire!