Serious help with "boss" needed!

[catnapper]

Ok, looong story short: I am a freelance interior designer, and have been working with an independant sales rep for nearly two years now. She and I get along great personally, and because of that she takes advantage of me with work. I know she does, but at this point, I am at a loss as to how to set her straight.

Right now, she seems to have lost sight of reality. She REFUSES to buy a color printer. So she makes me print out everything for her and mail it to her. In the begining it ws no big deal, a sheet of business cards here, a color coded furniture plan there. All of the sudden, she made me run off at LEAST 100 business cards (10 sheets) at a time. Ok, still not too bad, but she's asked me SEVERAL times. TEN sheets, of FULL color business cards with a colored background! Now, tonight she asked me to run off 20 full pages advertisement sheets. I emailed her and said NICELY that I can do it but it'll take a lot of ink (hoping in a passive aggressive way that she'd get the hint). So what does she do? E-mails me back saying that if I am worried about using too much ink that I should buy her a color printer for Christmas and then I'd not use my own ink. OMG! The worst part... she was SERIOUS about me buying a printer for Christmas!

I am at this point blazing mad! I have used well over $60 worth of ink for her over the past few months (not all at once, but if you think of a little here, a little there, it's added up, and lately her demands for color copies have increased)

I sent back a polite but firm email stating that I have not saiud anythign because I wanted to help her, and that I never requested she reimburse me, and that its getting to the point that she's going to HAVE to because its costing me some serious money. I also told her I never asked her to replace the business cards I used - and those weren't cheap either.

This is only ONE thing she's been doing ot me lately. Just one. WHAT can I do to get her to stop walking all over me? Every time I TRY to stand my ground, she gets testy and nasty. I then back down. Sigh.

[Cookiebaker]

Nobody can take advantage of you, unless you allow them to. When you send her the business cards, enclose an invoice for them.

In my line of work, I make business cards all the time, and my prices are:

100 Full Color, printed and cut: $22.50
250 full color, printed and cut: $37.50
500 full color, printed and cut: $72.50

The reason she makes you do them, is because she gets them for free, and she can't go anywhere else cheaper. Nothing in this life is free. AND, she can get what she pays for. If she doesn't pay you, I would print them out in black and white, and on the lowest possible quality.

To give you a little perspective: my mom is a seamstress, and she has a neighbor that likes to ask for "favors". My mom worked on a 3 hour job, and asked for $15. The neighbor got so offended that she has refused to talk to my Mom since. The thing is, nowhere else could she have a custom job done like that for $15, and she was only taking advantage of my Mom. Nobody needs a "friend" like that!

I hope this helps you a little bit, but I definitely would not do anymore printing "for free" for her. If she pays you, or returns in like kind, then that is a different story.

[sabies]

You say you get along great personally but it sure doesn't sound like it. I printed a newsletter recently as a 1-time project and I wanted it in color. Wow was I surprised at how much the cost added up. I looked into having it printed by kinko's or something and the cost for color was ridiculous.

Cookiebaker has great advice. I'm sure you know what you need to do to get her to stop walking all over you - don't back down.

(PS this is the type of do as I say not as I do advice, good luck!)

[catnapper]

Actually, when we are talking about things outside work, we get along famously. I cherish her friendship and opinion. But when we start talking work, she seems to forget that its business now, and to leave the personal stuff for later. Another friend we have in common has been working with her the past 6 months, and he's having the same problem with her. Sigh

[tz1]

charge her ass or fire her

[Laura's Babies]

I would just say from now on, I am out of ink and don't have the money to buy any right now.....end of story! (also adding that hubba is complaining that we are always out of ink and now has you on a budget because of it)


Or just outright say "NO!"....

[kimlovescats]

Kim ... she is taking advantage of your friendship!!! You stood up for yourself, now DON"T BACK DOWN!!! If she is willing to lose a friendship over something like this, then she's not a real friend. Also, as a business person, she should know better. YOU, as a business person DO know better, and that's why you WILL NOT let her treat you this way any more! RIGHT???

Your work is worth every penny, and don't forget it!

Hugs,
Kim

[areias]

Tell her to get a color printer...or you'll find someone else to replace her. In a nice way, though. Your telling me she can't walk her butt out the door, go to walmart, and pick up a printer? They have color printers for $24.99! I think she's just using you.

[Corinna]

Ditto as the others said. I have the same problem with a freind on sewing Japanese jackets I charged less for a 2nd one as I was doing it at the same time . Now she expects all that she orders at the lower price. People!!! I'm glad she has gotten all her orders done on this pattern.

[catland]

I don't quite understand your business relationship with her. Does she send you work or allow you to use her as a referal? Is there a reason that she thinks she's "earned" these perks? What would happen to your relationship if you did stop doing these "favors"?.

If the only issue for you is the cost of supplies - make her purchase them for you - ink and paper both. You can even label the ink "her cartridge" and use it just for her requests.

I've learned that passive-agressive is not a good strategy. You need to be direct. Invite her out for coffee (neutral territory), and tell her exactly what the problem is and how you are very concerned that it could damage your friendship. and then mean it.

Ultimately, if she really doesn't get it, then she isn't a real friend.

[catnapper]

Thanks everyone!

She sent back a snippy e-mail today "Fine then don't do it. I'll just have to get it done myself" Which means... "I'll whine to someone else until they can't take it anymore and print them out for me"

I have told her a hundred times that Walmart has a Lexmark printer for $40. I told her that I had bought it last Christmas as a temporary printer and it worked GREAT, and that for her printing needs it would be all she neeeded. Noooo.... she has her heart set on the same Epson printer I have (a $300 printer that I DO NEED because of my artwork and printing photos of enlarged photos for my portraits)

Our work relation ship is this: she hires ME to do work for her. But she considers me her personal slave, then ALWAYS balks when I send my bill. She's been "better" since I pointed out that I rarely charge for certain things (was part of our agreement up front) and you won't believe this, but when I said that, the conversation ended up like this "Yes you do. No, I Don't. Yes you do. No, I Don't" She must have spoken to a friend of hers and confirmed that the designer they use charges them for everything, including ther items I do not. I'm finding out the items I don't charge for are becoming increasingly more time in my day.

I am at the point that even though its her work that pays the car loans each month... I'm to the point that as soon as someone else comes along that offers me the same hours each week, that I'll take those hours and slowly phase this other woman out. I have a feeling that IF I did find another independant sales rep with as much business, and she found out I was working for them that she'd tell me to go jump off a bridge. Which amazes me because she KNOWS I am FREELANCE. She knows I am my own company! But that doesn't stop her from CONSTANTLY bringing up the suggestion I go on her payroll (at least once a week she tells me she wants to ut me on payroll, and at least once a week I tell her I like the way it is now, on a job by job basis.)

She calls me a dozen times a day. If I'm on the phone and don't pick up, she calls my cell. Then if I don't poick the cell up, she calls the office again... then the cell, then the office until I finally finish the first call and pick her up. Then I get reamed out for not using call waiting (which I think is tacking in a business setting unless you know the other call is vitally important.) So what was the call that this woman called my phones non-stop for? "oh I'm just checking in!" Then instead of going over business matters, she goes on about her cat, her lover, how unfair her husband is, you name it. I'll be stuck on the phone for over an hour listening to her gossip! but if I start to gossip? She gets huffy and says "I don't have time for chit-chat, lets get this project done"

Sorry to go off like that I have a lot of annimosity towards her right now. I didn't even touch half the problems I've been having with her lately. She's lost touch with reality.

[Craftlady]

I'd tell this women to stick it up her hiney and walk away from this whole situation. She is no friend and an idiot of a boss. She wont be a successful business person and out of business in matter of time. Your association with her will hurt you in the long run, word gets out anyone working for her etc is going to have a hard time finding other work, people will think everyone acts that way. Cut your losses and get out ASAP.

[sasvermont]

I would sit down with her, explain yourself in full, and then find a new client. Friends don't treat each other the way she treats you from time to time. She ain't your friend my dear. She is using you and treating you poorly. I don't think she will change but merely find some other kind soul to take advantage of. Time to move on I am afraid.

Good luck!

[Corinna]

As a sub contractor YOU work the strings not her, she has really found out how much shes getting for free and is afraid of loosing you. So she is trying to domainate you I wouldn't be surprized that you find when you look for new clients she has already started submarining you.
My hubby had a contractor (hardwood flooring) who tried this stuff to so we just had the office/home phone on a machine , got a cell that only family had the # for. This guy would call as hubby was trying to get the floors done, well not getting done, He would talk for an hour at a time . If I answered the phone he'd want Tim and then want to know where he was and if I told him what job (before I learned about him) he'd drive out and pester him there. Finally getting the Machine and no call backs until 11pm waking his 6 month old (rotten aren't we) he stopped using us no lose as in a year we got only 2 small floors and then all the people did was bitch about it. People with no money trying to have a expensive floor they can't afford,then trying to use the cheapest crapest material. We recently hear that he started his own flooring and what we have heard is not good, in fact we have be asked to redo his screw ups. We have pasted them on to another company who can afford to do them Bigger company.
You just have to put your foot down, if you lose her as aclient and freind you just replace her . I don't like working for freinds, I'm polite and freindly to our clients but we do not socailize with them. If we do work for a freind a contract is made up explaining all possiblity and the out comes, also if changes are made in the process they are noted and intialed by the client just so there is no problem. (on these job I usually spend more time on the site than others)
Hope some of these ideas help. You aren't alone in this kind of thing. Just part of owning your own buisness.

[Randi]

Kim, I agree with the others, you should bill her for the prints. If she refuses to pay, then end the business with her. She can't get it done cheaper than you do if you charge her the actual cost, so she'll come running back and beg you, I bet. She may try to get another to do it, but that person will get fed up with her in no time!

When John worked for a friend who owns a Bar, this guy wanted him to print A3 posters, but he was a really nice guy and bought the printer, as these posters were the only jobs he needed it for.

Good luck! I hope new customers will come your way!