How do you know when you're ready to have a baby?

[new mom to a veiled]

I was 23 when I had my first son. My husband and I had NOTHING. We rented a condo and were making car payments.....we had nothing!!!! We worked to pay the bills. I was on the pill when I became pregnant (my son is fine) so it wasn't planned. I wouldn't change any of it for the world. That little boy made me grow up and be a responsible person. I found a better job, I decided I wasnt going to settle for uhhhh anymore. After 4 years we bought a house. My husband and I both have fantastic jobs now and have had a second child. We had another boy who is now almost 11 months. As so many other people have said..........If you wait for all to be right with the world before you have a baby, you'll never have one!!!! Best of luck with whatever path you choose

[Cataholic]

Hmmm....I would like to weigh in on the 'older' mother! I was 38 when I had Jones, and can't really say I was more tired than I would have been at 24 (sleep deprivation is a form of torture...I don't think anyone really fares better despite their age! ). I can say that I was financially stable, had a house, a car, my education completed, and all my 'partying' (ugh, I hate that word) done. So, while having Jones had a huge impact on my life, I never felt, "oh, if only I had done this, or that, first".

What I do find easier is having the luxury of knowing my own mind, and not being so concerned with what anyone else thinks about raising my child.

(I might add, since she might read it!!! that Lillycat has a HUGE amount of sayso in raising this little monkey man! )

[Jods]

No ones ever "ready" for a baby. If you think your ready everything will work out and everything will fall into place. My Aunt really wants another baby and shes been waiting for the right moment for years now. She is now 35, after 35 they have to do a bunch of testing now because down syndrome is greater risk for older couples. Shes been waiting forever because she wants to be prepared but I keep saying nothing is ever going to be perfect when the baby is here you will be ready for it.

Good luck with whatever you choose!!

[Cataholic]

I want to add- in the USA, when you are older than 35, you are considered AMA (advanced maternal age). While it is true that there are some risks that increase, the increase is not really that significant. You are OFFERED tests, you are not REQUIRED to undergo any 'extra' tests. Age, alone, is not a complicating factor.