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Thread: Moving day - my mom is going into foster care.

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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Location
    catlandia
    Posts
    3,100

    Moving day - my mom is going into foster care.

    It's a sad day for my family. My mom, who has advanced alzheimer's disease, is moving into foster care today. She is 82 years old.

    While she was getting more and more forgetful over the past decade, it's been just in this last year when she really started to decline with the paranoia, wandering, and the confusion of the later stages. She no longer recognized her home and sometimes woudn't recognize my dad or the rest of us.

    Finally, she really began to plummet since the first of the year. Her language skills are declining, she has to eat with her fingers, and losing her equilibrium. She broke her wrist last week.

    So today my dad is taking his bride of 59 years to a foster home and is absolutely devistated. He's that WWII generation kind of guy that isn't used to asking for help.

    I don't know why I'm writing this, other than PT therapy is just about the best thing going.

    thanks for listening.

    Ione's daughter.

    These are not the droids you were looking for

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Tennessee, USA
    Posts
    17,326
    ((((BIG HUGS)))) to you! My mom is 77 and in the earlier stages of Alzheimer's ... though my Dad (83) won't accept it. She has times when she doesn't recognize my Dad or gets confused as to who me and my sister are as well. She thinks we are her sisters. She thinks my Dad is a nice man who has come to take care of her.

    I just wanted to say that I can certainly feel your and your Dad's pain. My Dad is from the WWII time as well, was in the Air Force and is extremely proud!

    Prayers for you and your mom and dad!

    Kim
    Kim Loves Cats and Doggies Too!

  3. #3
    my heart aches for you today. How hard this is for your dad to do, even though probably everyone agrees it is the best for her safety. I lost my own mom to Alzheimer's 5 years ago. She was born in 1917 and was 85. My dad is also that same era - so very difficult for them especially - to not be able to "fix" everything. I know that my own dad felt so guilty when he finally had to find a home for her - even though my brother and I encouraged him to do so - he had such a hard time accepting the illness. Is there anything especially comforting that you could do for your dad over the next few days??

    This - being a daughter with aging/failing parents - is overwhelming for me at times. (((hugs))) to you, to your dad, and to Ione.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2006
    Location
    Methuen, MA; USA
    Posts
    17,105
    Quote Originally Posted by sirrahbed
    my heart aches for you today. . . . .

    This - being a daughter with aging/failing parents - is overwhelming for me at times. (((hugs))) to you, to your dad, and to Ione.
    Deb, you said it so very well, so I am just going to quote it. I see it with my Dad.

    Hugs to you, Ione's daughter. And yes, do try to find some things to do with your Dad the next few days, he will be lost without her there with him. It will help you cope as well.
    .

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2000
    Location
    Windham, Vermont, USA
    Posts
    40,861
    Perhaps take a few days to spend a set time with your Dad each day, and make an "oral history" with a tape recorder if he's okay with that, of their time together. It might be sad at first, but perhaps the happy memories will come to dominate the mood.

    You will all be in our prayers.
    I've Been Frosted

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    Wyoming, USA
    Posts
    4,102
    I'm so sorry.

    My father passed away in February at age 82, and my mom, age 78, is getting very forgetful and confused. I foresee that decision coming in the next few years for our family as well.

    That generation is a priceless asset to our world, and to see them, one by one, pass away is simply a tragedy. The world is going to be a far worse place when the survivors of WWII and the great depression can no longer share their wisdom and strength.

    My thoughts and prayers are with you.
    "We give dogs the time we can spare, the space we can spare and the love we can spare. And in return, dogs give us their all. It's the best deal man has ever made" - M. Facklam

    "We are raised to honor all the wrong explorers and discoverers - thieves planting flags, murderers carrying crosses. Let us at last praise the colonizers of dreams."- P.S. Beagle

    "All that is gold does not glitter, Not all those who wander are lost; The old that is strong does not wither, Deep roots are not reached by the frost. From the ashes a fire shall be woken, A light from the shadows shall spring; Renewed shall be blade that was broken, The crownless again shall be king." - J.R.R. Tolkien

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