I don't know what to do anymore, or who to talk to...
My mom and I fight a lot. We also get along good though...if we're not fighting, we're like best friends. She means a lot to me, but I just can't take this not getting along thing. She makes me feel like crap.
Last year we were driving to halifax and got into a serious car accident. It was raining harder than I've ever seen it rain before, plus the tires were 70% worn and needed to be replaced (I didn't know this till after) Anyway, I was driving and we hydroplaned. I was driving. I felt so horrible and guilty that I can remember thinking at the time I was going to go into the woods and wished I would die there. I STILL feel badly. I don't really feel it was my fault...I mean, these things happen...I'm a very careful driver...I even still see it in my head (the accident) when I'm driving on highways.
Anyway, suddenly this year, my moms insurance goes up $300 dollars. It didn't go up after the accident appearintly because we didn't hit anyway.
I don't drive her car a lot cause I don't live with her, but every now and then I want to do some place I can't walk to....like the farm I worked on. It's 1.5 hours away, so a 3 hour drive there and back. I usually drive my dads car, but I feel badly using it all the time...
I went to the farm last week with my dads car, and want to go this weekend to see the baby llama. Now, I don't go out that often, it's just because I want to see the baby. Anyway, so I asked my mom if I could borrow her car this weekend and she like flips out at me. She says well, you know I'm going to take you off my insurance because I can't afford an extra $300. *I* wasn't even driving but yet it still goes up. It wasn't *my* fault! YOU should pay the $300. (If she doesn't have that then I certainly don't...) She kept implying how it's my fault and everything. I would pay her the money but I just don't have it. I almost never drive her car. I only drove that day because it was a long drive and she got tired. Then she was like how dad's car isn't in good condition because of how I drive it...she didn't say it like that but that's what she ment. I've never even gotten a speeding ticket (knock on wood) let along ruined it. She said "oh well you can go fast over bumps in a big truck, but you can't in my car". Um, no, not really. I don't drive like that no matter what I'm driving.
She keeps implying that I drive poorly. My dad, whom I live with and use his car often has never once told me I can't drive good or that I break the truck. I've never been in any accident other than that ONE.
Oh yeah, and a while ago I borrowed her car while she was away, and a light came on and said "change oil" she flipped out at me for that yelling at me saying I broke it and that it was something I did to it. Guess what was wrong with it? NOTHING! The light just popped on?!
99% of the times I'm upset is after I've been talking to her. It makes me feel like I can't do anything right and that I ruin anything I do. I feel like I've ruined her life or something because she needs to pay an extra $300 a year. She keeps saying "Geez, I might as well just sell it!"
You know what? She has a 2005 grandam. Why would she buy such an expensive car when she can't afford it!!!
Sorry for venting. I don't mean to talk rudely of my mother. I love her dearly, but it's really hurting me...I try to talk to her, but she honestly doesn't listen to anything I say. Actually, that's another thing that hurts me. I can be talking to her and she'll just start talking to someone else like I wasn't even saying anything. And I KNOW she knew I was talking cause she does this ALL the time. And once when I was telling her how I felt, I needed to say something 5 times PLUS say "you don't listen to me" 5 times before she actually heard me.
i'm sorry this sounds so immature, but it's just how I type. I hold it all inside and sort of bursts out of me in one long confusing story.
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Originally Posted by Catty1
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