(off topic) but I just need a hug.

[jenluckenbach]

My Dad's best friend passed away today. Now realize that my dad is 78 and his friend was similar age, and sickly at that, but I can't stop crying. He was an important part of my dad's life and my dad (like me, when MY best friend died) really has no one else. And to top off the fact that he will miss this firend enormously, my dad is very quiet about his emotions...........so he will grieve alone. I'll KNOW that he is hurting, but he will neither admit it nor talk about it (just like when my mom died).

I know that you don't know him, but I just felt a need to express my grief.

Thanks for listening

[Barbara]

When one of Siegmar's best friends (there are two) passed away some years ago it was very bad also because you get the message that someone your age is going.....

{{{{{Hugs}}}}} to you and all best wishes for your dad.

[Grace]

For Jen -

[Karen]

Big hugs to you, and to your Dad.

[Randi]

Oh Jen, that is sad, your dad must feel so alone. I know it's also hard on you, but at least you have Charlie, some friends .... and your kitties. I hope your dad is not too far away, and even though he doesn't want you to see he is grieving, keep in touch and be there to listen if he wants to talk. That often helps a little.

((((hugs))))

[luvofallhorses]

((((hugs)))))

[CultureJunky]

I think that although you dad won't talk about his feelings, as long as you are there for him if he ever needs to talk, then that's the most important thing.
It is times like this you think about those close to you, and imagine what your life will be like without them, it's what everybody thinks, I guess it's the way humans ponder their own mortality.
So please don't think you are alone, I think everybody has felt that way, it's part of life.
You just have to make sure your father doesn't feel alone, and at least offer him some help, inviting him around for dinner etc, helping him out, letting him know you are there for him.
People deal with things in different ways, I'm sure if he ever felt the need to open up he would, and that person would probably be you.
I hope you start to feel a bit better soon, which I'm sure you will.
Hugs from Jack & Sunny to make you feel a bit better

[catnapper]

Jen, I am so soory! I hope your dad will be able to express himself. I know that you will be there whenever he needs you.

[joycenalex]

((hugs))

[Russian Blue]

Awww..I'm so sorry for the current situation. My mother and step-father are reaching their 70's and I dread if one of them passes. It can be such an isolating experience. Even though it is a cycle of life, it sure isn't an easy one.

But I am glad that you do have people to support you Jen during times like this. ((( hugs )))

[catlover4ever]

((((hugs))))

[jenluckenbach]

Thanks everyone for taking the time to read and to answer. I am uncertain why this is hitting me so hard. I actually can not stop the tears. Why would this person's death be so tramatic for me? Is it because I am grieving in a way I know my dad can't? could it be the memory of the loss of my own friend? I just feel so bad.

[Grace]

Why would this person's death be so tramatic for me? Is it because I am grieving in a way I know my dad can't?

Might it be because you are thinking ahead, to a time when it might be your dad instead of one of his friends?

[kitimom]

We are sending great big hugs to you and Dad. The best gift you could give to him now is to be there for him. You don't have to talk....sometimes just being together, quietly, speaks volumes. I pray that you both will find peace in this sorrowful time......

[jazzcat]

A great big (((((HUG))))) Jen.