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Thread: Wish I could go home.

  1. #1

    Wish I could go home.

    On Easter Sunday I went & spent the day with Tom. Rob had been gone all week so I was able to go to the old place. Tom was ranting about Rob not returning until Tue & missing work (Tom needs Rob to drive him to work). Well ya, Tom said some things & then the puzzle was complete.

    Rob has been cheating on me for months with a girl in Sudbury
    I knew when he told me that he was going to be meeting some gun buddies in Sudbury back in Jan/Feb it was a crock of BS. He had told me months ago that he doesn't talk to them anymore & when I asked to go, strangly it was a no. SO I asked to be dropped off at my aunts house in Sudbury & that was still a no. So I just brushed it off. Then Rob broke up with me the monday before his trip. Its all clear now. He built an office in the 3rd bedroom & bought a webcam all for her

    All the times he dissapeared for work & couldn't be reached, he was with her. I wonder all the times he said he was going flying & would be gone all day, if he was with her then too. I feel so dirty & used. I feel like he was only with me until he found someone else who would do what I refused to do (I know thats why he ditched me).

    Toms really P'ed off & hes planning on moving back to Ottawa. I don't want him to go, as I'll be alone in this strange city.

    I just want to go home.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Pixsburgh
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    5,004
    Oh honey ((((hugs))) I am so sorry that you are going through this. I can't believe that he was cheating all that time. If you ever need to talk, PM me. You'll get through this, we are always here to help.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 2002
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    Where emerald eyes are smiling....
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    I've seen so many people in your position. Remember, what doesn't break you will make you stronger. Also, life is not fair but is full of lessons we can learn from so we don't let them happen again. Chalk this up as one of those experiences and in the meantime start develping your own goals. Work on making yourself stronger and independent.

    I'm not saying it's easy, just there is life after a relationship and you have the power to use this experience for your benefit. See this as a kick start to a new path. What do you want to do with your life? Where do you want to be in 2, 5, 10 years from now? Start developing a plan and setting yourself some short and long term goals. Once you start focussing your energies on your current life, rather than on something that was in the past, new ideas and paths will open up. Focus on the positive, since the negative thoughts will just drain you.

    Remember, right now you have a job and a place to live. You can do anything you want with the rest of your life, with no restrictions.
    Don't be afraid that your life will end. Be afraid that it will never begin.

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by Russian Blue
    I've seen so many people in your position. Remember, what doesn't break you will make you stronger. Also, life is not fair but is full of lessons we can learn from so we don't let them happen again. Chalk this up as one of those experiences and in the meantime start develping your own goals. Work on making yourself stronger and independent.

    I'm not saying it's easy, just there is life after a relationship and you have the power to use this experience for your benefit. See this as a kick start to a new path. What do you want to do with your life? Where do you want to be in 2, 5, 10 years from now? Start developing a plan and setting yourself some short and long term goals. Once you start focussing your energies on your current life, rather than on something that was in the past, new ideas and paths will open up. Focus on the positive, since the negative thoughts will just drain you.

    Remember, right now you have a job and a place to live. You can do anything you want with the rest of your life, with no restrictions.
    Thanks for the kind words... I'm just over stressed as this will be my 3rd week late... I didn't notice being late as I had other things on my mind & couldn't remember when I moved out. Tom told me how long I have been out for & that makes this week being the 3rd week I'm late...

    I don't know what to do. I can't go to the Dr. as I'll have to miss several hours of work & I cannot afford any missed time. Not wasting $ on those cheap pee on me tests at the pharmacy as they didn't work for my friends or sister. If I'm still late by the end of the month (I PRAY I'm not) I don't know what to do except to call my dad... & I don't know how to tell Rob... As I had a scare not too long ago, he seemed ok, but not impresed...

    If I am, I know I can live with it, its Rob's reaction I'm scared of... ugg didn't think my life could get any worse after learning that Rob was cheating on me & useing me...

  5. #5
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Pixsburgh
    Posts
    5,004
    Could you maybe try one of the home tests? Some of them are supposed to be really good, maybe it depends on what brand you use. The EPT (or Error Proof Test) is supposed to be one of the best, I think it may cost a few dollars more but it might be worth it if you can find out for sure. If you are, what do you think Rob will say/do?

  6. #6
    Quote Originally Posted by JenBKR
    Could you maybe try one of the home tests? Some of them are supposed to be really good, maybe it depends on what brand you use. The EPT (or Error Proof Test) is supposed to be one of the best, I think it may cost a few dollars more but it might be worth it if you can find out for sure. If you are, what do you think Rob will say/do?
    Well I have to go to shoppers tonight anyway.. I'll see if I can find the EPT (not looking forward to it)...

    I really don't know what Rob will do if I am. I think I'll avoid telling Rob until I'm too far gone (like 6-7 months) or if he spots me.. I know I promissed to tell him if it ever happed when I first met him, but he also said he wouldn't cheat & when I asked him when he ditched me he said there wasn't another girl, so... I'll tell Tom right away, as I know he'll help me out big time (hes like a brother to me). I'll tell my dad (don't want to tell him at all) & hope I don't get yelled at (he wont be mean to me, he'll just freakout & say how I need to lawyer up, & swear about Rob & other things)...

    I don't want to be carring, but I do in a way (I wanted to start a family this summer & get married)

  7. #7
    Join Date
    May 2005
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    At least you have a good support system in your dad and Tom (and us!). I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers, hopefully you'll be able to find out soon one way or another. It kind of sounds like maybe part of you wants to be pregnant. I know it can be scary though, so many things in life can be scary, but you have been through this much already, you can get through this too

  8. #8
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Ploss's Halfway House for Homeless Cats
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    18,311
    Remember, right now you have a job and a place to live. You can do anything you want with the rest of your life, with no restrictions
    Think of the possibilities!!! I always thought I was nothing without a man. It took me years to realize I'm my own best friend cuz I'm always around when I need me.

    Rest In Peace Casey (Bubba Dude) Your paw print will remain on my heart forever. 12/02
    Mollie Rose, you were there for me through good times and in bad, from the beginning.Your passing will leave a hole in my heart.We will be together "One Fine Day". 1994-2009
    MooShoo,you left me too soon.I wasn't ready.Know that you were my soulmate and have left me broken hearted.I loved you like no other. 1999 - 2010See you again "ONE FINE DAY"
    Maya Linn, my heart is broken. The day your beautiful blue eyes went blind was the worst day of my life.I only wish I could've done something.I'll miss your "premium" purr and our little "conversations". 1997-2013 See you again "ONE FINE DAY"

    DO NOT BUY WHILE SHELTER ANIMALS DIE!!

  9. #9
    Quote Originally Posted by JenBKR
    At least you have a good support system in your dad and Tom (and us!). I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers, hopefully you'll be able to find out soon one way or another. It kind of sounds like maybe part of you wants to be pregnant. I know it can be scary though, so many things in life can be scary, but you have been through this much already, you can get through this too

    We have been planing on kids for years & this was suppose to be the summer, if Rob made it past his 3 month period with work (we knew he would). We talked about this in Jan & when I was having spotting issues a couple months ago he seemed concerned about my health (cancer runs in the family down there) & if i could still have kids & was excited that the dr. said theres a good chance you are preg (I never was told yes or no, I just assumed no as the Dr. didn't say my tests were positive, she only went on about me being Obese, which I'm not, chubby ya but not obese!).. I know I've put on several pounds the past few weeks, but I think its casue of the crappy diet I'm on right now.

  10. #10
    Quote Originally Posted by moosmom
    Think of the possibilities!!! I always thought I was nothing without a man. It took me years to realize I'm my own best friend cuz I'm always around when I need me.

    Its not, not having a man around thats bothering me.. I've never been alone, as I was living with my folks before I moved in with Rob. I'm also in a strang city, with no friends & don't know my way around & can't get to everything (Rob wouldn't let me finish my drivers & it expires in July I I don't have a car, I'm sooo screwed for ID)

  11. #11
    Join Date
    May 2002
    Location
    Ploss's Halfway House for Homeless Cats
    Posts
    18,311
    Does the State your in have photo ID's as opposed to a driver's license? My daughter can't drive but the State gave her a State issued ID that she uses for check cashing, etc.

    I know what it's like to live in a strange city knowing no one. When I moved to Michigan (for what I THOUGHT were all the right reasons) I only knew 4 people. It was tought being so far away from my friends and family. After 3 years of searching for a job, with little or no success, I decided to move back to CT where my friends and family are.

    Is there any way you can move back with your family?? I mean, not living WITH them, but just having them around. It'll do wonders for you.

    I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers kiddo. You aren't alone. You've got us here at PT. Don't ever forget that!!

    Rest In Peace Casey (Bubba Dude) Your paw print will remain on my heart forever. 12/02
    Mollie Rose, you were there for me through good times and in bad, from the beginning.Your passing will leave a hole in my heart.We will be together "One Fine Day". 1994-2009
    MooShoo,you left me too soon.I wasn't ready.Know that you were my soulmate and have left me broken hearted.I loved you like no other. 1999 - 2010See you again "ONE FINE DAY"
    Maya Linn, my heart is broken. The day your beautiful blue eyes went blind was the worst day of my life.I only wish I could've done something.I'll miss your "premium" purr and our little "conversations". 1997-2013 See you again "ONE FINE DAY"

    DO NOT BUY WHILE SHELTER ANIMALS DIE!!

  12. #12
    my dad lives in PEI, thats 2000km away
    If I had a car I'd drive all the way there with my pets & stay there. But it would cost a min, of 1000.00 to get there by car & Rob put me in the poor house (-5000.00 in credit cards, & he spent most of my school money on his stupid guns, so thats an extra -15,000.00, so ya I'm pretty screwed).

    I don't think there is any ID for me, I need to be a student to get it. I spent 600-700.00 to get my licence (Rob made me) & I've been trying to get Rob to let me drive for practice, so I can get my Permit & not have to worry.


    I was just told That DTSM (driving school) WILL let you rent their car for 1-2hrs & with an instructor for the G Test!!!! I'm gonna call them first thing tomorrow, after I cash my tax money (good by camera) to make a date! YAY!! It'll cost me about 200.00 & hopefully I can drive in this darn city! or I'll get 60.00 from dad to take the bus to Ottawa & do my G test in my home town (I know all the streets & there are no major HWY's )

  13. #13
    Oh, I'm sorry Just let him go, it's his loss not yours!

  14. #14
    First time I got to speek to Rob in weeks.. Of course it didn't go well & I panicked & told him I'm 3 weeks late.. Didn't go well at all... I hope I'm not!

  15. #15
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Location
    Pixsburgh
    Posts
    5,004
    Uh oh, what did he say?

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