A Cat's New Year Resolutions

[Edwina's Secretary]

I will not flush the toilet while my human is in the shower.
I will not puff my entire body to twice its size for no reason after my humans watch a horror movie.
I will not slurp fish food from the surface of the aquarium.
I will not lean over to drink out of the tub, fall in, and then run screaming into the box of clumping cat litter.
I will not use the humans' bathtub to store live mice for late-night
snacks.
I will not eat large numbers of assorted bugs, then come home and barf them up so the humans can see that I'm getting plenty of roughage.
My human will never let me eat her pet rat, and I am at peace with that.
I will not help myself to Q-tips, and I will not attempt to stuff them down the drain to dispose of them.
I will not perch on my human's chest in the middle of the night and stare into her eyes until she wakes up.
As fast as I am, I must remember that I cannot run through closed doors.
I will not back up off the front porch and fall into the bushes just
as my human is explaining to his girlfriend how graceful I am.
I will remember that I am a walking static generator. My human does not need my help installing a new board in her computer.
Birds do not come from the bird feeder. I will not repeatedly knock it down and try to open it up to get the birds out.
I will remember that my human really will wake up and feed me. I do not have to pry his eyelids open with my claws.
I will remember that a warm pepperoni pizza is not a good place for a nap!

[AmberLee]

Well done! I wish my dynamic duo would take some of these resolutions for their own.

The Q-tips hit home for my fur-family. But the biggie for me? I'd spent hours cleaning the bathroom before a visit and SOMEONE nameless wallowed in the damp tub, into the clumping litter, back through the tub, the sink basin, then apparently exploded (?!?) in a flurry of mini-clumps and fur in the middle of the floor. It looked like I hadn't done a thing. Later, he wanted extra cuddlies: got 'em, but it took a while before I got into the mode.

Arrrggghhhhh! Cats gotta love 'em.

[Edwina's Secretary]

Edwina loves to sit at the base of the bird bath. She hides at the very base of it and stares up....waiting for those birds to emerge. Sometimes we lift her up and she looks intently into the water trying to figure out where they are.

Of couse, the birds are smart enough not to come near it while she is there but she makes the picture of the "Eternal Optimist."

Since it is a heavy, concrete structure I hope she never figures out how to knock it over!

[LoudLou]

Top Ten Signs That You Are A “Crazy Cat Lady”


1. Your colleagues no longer ask how your weekend was. Instead they ask how your cats are doing.
2. People at work have stopped offering you their lint brushes. They realize it’s hopeless anyway.
3. When you get your latest roll of film developed, there’s not a single human being in the pictures.
4. You have more cats than the local pet store and there are several litter boxes in every room of your apartment.
5. Your personal motto is: “You can never have enough cats”
6. You buy more than 60 pounds of cat litter a month.
7. You’d rather watch hours of boring infomercials than disturb the cat sleeping on the remote.
8. You choose your friends based on how well your cats like them.
9. The only time you leave your apartment is to feed the stray cats in the neighborhood.
10. You introduce your cats by name to the pizza delivery guy.

[AmberLee]

Gulp ....

These only APPROXIMATE my behavior guys.


Though .... I was talking to a real estate lady who was handling a condo in my complex. When I told her which building I lived in she asked how close I lived to the Crazy Cat Lady. As I'm the only one in my building with cats, I should've been suspicious, right? Yep, 'tis I, the CCL...