Good-Bye Cody, My Love

[K9karen]

Cody had a terrible night. He moaned and could not get comfortable on his side, so he just laid straight with his head up. I couldn't sleep, seeing him crawl across the rug, his leg so swollen he couldn't get up. I laid beside him and comforted him and one look in his eyes, I knew. I had to overcome my selfishness and misery and make the dreaded call.
I called Dr Fox at home, and he met my brother and I at 730a.
One look, and Dr Fox said I made the right decsion. No commotion, Cody went right into his favorite room and laid down.
I soaked Cody with tears and kisses. Even Dr Fox cried. Cody's gums were white from anemia, his breathing shallow from it too. He couldn't even pee this morning, just a pin drop. if I hadn't made the call, i would have postponed it and watched him suffer.

My sweet pumpkin, love of my life, premier dog, passed very very peacefully and quietly at 757a. How awful of me to say, but now that I'm not working, I thought I'd spend valuable time with Cody. Funny how things work out. No job. no dog all in less than 24 hours. My brother and I told dad to meet him with open arms and to take good care of him for us.

I know my boy is at peace now. But I miss him physically,,his toys and bones and bed and food dish are staring at me.

For those of you who survived this, please twll me how you did it.
I'm still in shock.

Thank you for all your wonderful prayers. I can't ever repay you for your kindness and support. I seriously don't know what I'd do without you. Remember I love you all.

Karen

Ps.. Geez, Em, DOTD looks so much like Cody I almost passed out!

[tatsxxx11]

Oh, God, Karen. I'm so sorry. I wish I could say something; I can't. I think of that day, letting my Jingles go, and the incredible pain returns and my heart breaks for you and for me all over again because I know how empty, alone and devastated you feel. I'm crying so hard I can't breath or see well. right now you just need to cry, yell, pound the wall, do whatever you have to do to let the pain out. I sat on the shower floor, watering pouring over my head, put my fist in my mouth and just sobbed. Friends and family will help, but now you need to let all of the saddness and pain out. Time will begin to help you heal, but for now, you need to grieve. I'm glad you have your Mom there. And you know you have us here. I'll call you soon. Goodbye beautiful, brave Cody. We love you. Thank you Karen for being the best Mommy a doggie could ever hope for.

[Logan]

To be such a beautiful day, it is a sad day. I almost wish it were raining and cold, to match my mood. As I told you before, Karen, we can say "there's a reason things are happening like they are", but God knows when we'll understand what the reasons were. Maybe God is providing this gorgeous sunshine as a greeting for Cody as he steps into his new life, surrounded by so many of our loved ones! I take heart in believing that my Kaycee was right there to welcome him.

What I do know is that Cody had you with him, every single step of his long, wonderful life. He will always be your heart dog, your first "baby". Your memories of him will be wonderful, one day, Karen, and the grief will subside somewhat, but never totally go away.

I just went and gave each yellow dog a hug and a kiss, and of course a cookie, in memory of Cody and in honor of you. I just wish we were closer, so you could just bury your face in one of their necks and feel their warmth.

We love you, dearly, and are here for you.
Logan

[ramanth]

Karen, I can do nothing but cry tears for your loss and tell you how sorry I am and by doing that I feel as if I'm slighting you.

I can't tell you how I got thru the pain of losing two cats, because, to be honest, I have no clue. I still mourn them and miss them, but as the days went by the pain did ease a little and I cherish the memories.

RIP darling Cody. You were loved and you will be missed.

*hugs* to your Karen.

[robinh]

Oh, Karen, I am so sorry. We had to let my Peach go on March 10th. Dick and I both cried and cried. I know how you feel - I really do. I still have days of being totally lost, I miss my Peach so much but each day is a little better.

It's been said, but your Cody trusted you to do the right thing when the time came and you did it. There is no greater gift you could have given him. I hope you take comfort in that and the fact that he is with your father running, jumping and playing without pain.

Remember also that you have friends here, some well known - some new. But each of us wants you to know that we care for you and will also miss Cody if only from the joyful stories you have told us about him.

Robin

[Rachel]

Originally posted by K9karen
Ps.. Geez, Em, DOTD looks so much like Cody I almost passed out!

Me too, Karen, and did you see the big smile on EM's face? All I could think of was that this was a message for you from Cody at the Rainbow Bridge. He is free of pain now and although he will miss you, he can run and play with the puppy spirit that always was within him.

[Logan]

You guys are right! Em does look like Cody and it is the first thing I thought of this morning when I saw her smiling face.

[sasvermont]

Karen, you will be in my thoughts and prayers for days to come. I just know how awful you must feel. Remember that your dear Cody is no longer in pain and discomfort. You did the right thing.

SAS

[Rachel]

Albea posted this on the other thread for you. I thought is should be on this one too.

From Friend to Friend

You're giving me a special gift,
So sorrowfully endowed,
And through these last few cherished days,
Your courage makes me proud.

But really, love is knowing
When your best friend is in pain,
And understanding earthly acts
Will only be in vain.

So looking deep into your eyes,
Beyond, into your soul,
I see in you the magic, that will
Once more make me whole.

The strength that you possess,
Is why I look to you today,
To do this thing that must be done,
For it's the only way.

That strength is why I've followed you,
And chose you as my friend,
And why I've loved you all these years...
My partner 'til the end.

Please, understand just what this gift,
You're giving, means to me,
It gives me back the strength I've lost,
And all my dignity.

You take a stand on my behalf,
For that is what friends do.
And know that what you do is right,
For I believe it too.

So one last time, I breathe your scent,
And through your hand I feel,
The courage that's within you,
To now grant me this appeal.

Cut the leash that holds me here,
Dear friend, and let me run,
Once more a strong and steady dog,
My pain and struggle done.

And don't despair my passing,
For I won't be far away,
Forever here, within your heart,
And memory I'll stay.

I'll be there watching over you,
Your ever faithful friend,
And in your memories I'll run,
...a young dog once again.

In Memory of Asta, Feb. 1997
(c) Karen Clouston

[gini]

Karen, I don't even know you as well as the others, but when I saw your post I just burst into tears.

I agree with Logan and Sandra that it is important that you totally give in to your grief. Cry your heart out until you can cry no more.

Is it any comfort to you to remember that you gave this one beautiful dog more love and companionship than many other dogs ever receive in their life. When there is a heart-bond between an animal and a human somehow the pain becomes so much more intense.

I have lost four pets over the years, but they are never lost but right up front in my heart - never, ever to be forgotten.

I wish that I could wrap my own arms around you and give you a shoulder to cry on..........

And, I am so very sorry that you have lost Cody. But yet, you haven't lost him --- he is right there with you forever.

[Corinna]

Karen I write this with a heavy heart and tears in my eyes. The only 2 things that helped me with my loss, I spent time with non dog freinds doing things I hadn't been able to do with a dog ( trip) and I was getting married so Tim and I spent more time togeather Maybe you and your brother could take a little trip even just overnight some where. Or some small day trips.
We here know the pain of the loss please don't leave us though we pull to geather at these times to help each other. Cuz we all care about you.

[Pam]

Karen when I saw the title of this post I started crying. I didn't even need to read further. I knew he would let you know but oh how heart wrenching when you realize that it truly is time.. Your farewell post is a beautiful tribute to a very special dog that we all feel we knew too. Please know that you did what needed to be done. Cody just couldn't do it any more. His body had given all he had to give and you gave him the gift of no more pain. Now you, my dear friend, will have some hard days ahead but please believe me when I say that will lessen. Each time we lost a furkid to the Bridge, for the first few weeks whenever my husband and I would pass each other in the house we would just grab each other and hold tight and cry. Words were not necessary. Soon the wound began to heal. Karen you have been on my mind constantly and still are. I hope it helps to know that I am praying for you still. If you need to call to cry or vent or whatever please do. {{{{hugs}}}} to you. Wish I could deliver them in person.

[anna_66]

Here I sit getting ready to go to work & just thought I'd check in once more, and I see your post. So here I am, in tears, knowing how you feel. It's been almost 2 years for me & it still seems so fresh in my mind.
I know you did the right thing for Cody, but that doesn't make it any easier. All you have left is the wonderful times you've spent together, remember these always, because at times when you feel like you just can't handle it any more, they will bring you through.
I wish there was some magic word I could say to make you feel better, but there isn't.
Please remember we are all here for you, any time you need us.
{{{{HUGS}}}}
Anna, Angus, Roxey & Huney

[lizbud]

Karen,

I am crying like a baby right now, so can't type much yet.All the
old memories come flooding back. If there is ever a time for hugs
it's now.{{{{ HUGS }}}.We all love you and are with you in
spirit. Rest in Peace Sweet Cody.

An Angel Is Born

I held you in my arms,
As you took your final breath,
Tears filled my eyes,
As I finally accepted your death.
As you become an angel,
Tear drops hit the floor,
Silence fills the room,
Pain you'll feel no more.
How will I live without you?
How will I go on?
How will I face another day,
Knowing that you're gone?
But I wasn't selfish,
I only thought of you,
The peace that you must feel,
It was something I had to do.
So fly up to heaven,
Be at peace my baby,
We had a lifetime of something wonderful,
Never forget how happy you made me.

By: Stephanie (StephJS2)

[zippy-kat]

What can I add that hasn't been said?

Everyone truly cares for you, Karen. We're here to help you through this gut-wrenching time.

You aksed, how do you survive?
Take it one breath at a time, one tear at a time, one memory at a time, until you reach the point you can take it one smile at a time. Remember, not only was he your once-in-a-lifetime-dog, you were his once-in-a-lifetime Mom.

{{huggs 'n prayers}}