Star Flash!!!

[tatsxxx11]

Hey everybody out there in Pet Talk Land!! Better intraduce my self I guess, tho I feel I alredy know you guys as mom's always talkin bout you and your furkids. This here is Star, yellow lab extraordinairrre! You know, owner of Tats, or as we all call her round here, Mom, Mom, good ole Mom. Well, I don't know what's happenin in your den, but here all they've been talkin about lately is some pup named Cinder!! Cinder this, Cinder that!! Cinder, Stray, and more Cinder! Cinder and Stray stories ALL DAY LONG!! Beee-geeeee-zus!! I've got Cinder stories comin outta my ears!! It's enuf to make any self respectin, limelite hogging lab such as myself chase her tail and start lickin up a really nasty hot spot. (Wouldn't that send mom over the edge ) OK, so Cinder sounds like a pretty cool doggie pup. The Kid too. And OK, so they're kinda funny. But all this Cinder talk is takin the shine off me! As you probably already know, I AM the center of my mom's universe after all. Yeah, yeah, I know she's always tellin you guys tall tails about how nuts I make her and how I'm always gettin into mischif. But dad says moms always zaggeratin bout somethin and makin herself crazy anyway. Like the other day... So I got into the trash and ate a few BIG onions. (**BURP**) Boy, you da thunk the world was comin to an end round here. I thought they went down reeeeel eazy. Tried to cover my traks, but when mom discovered the smelly evidence, specially the stinky breath which I admit, could knock a mastiff on it's butt, boy, was there hell to pay! She was pacing the floor big time and pulling at her hair, calling a major time out, and well actin reeel nuts!! Before ya know it, she's on the fone to doc Paul talkin all lab-sterical!! I thought a grabbin Cody by the paw and hedin for the hills, but mom caught me (man she's fast) and I got a reeeeeal long time out for that one. Thought she was NEVER gonna let me get off my bed. Man, sometimes I think mom should pop a few doggie downers herself. Dad says I'm gonna give her a nervis breakdown one day and they may have to put her away somewhere for good and then who would I have to torment? Sumthin to think about I guess. But I'm thinkin, girls just wanna have fun. So, before I go doin anything draztic to my self over all this Cinder talk thing, thought I'd get on this puter and start a little bark board of my own. I call it the "Star Flash." Givin you all the "poop" from my den and scoops (get it, poops?? scoops??) from all around doggie dom in general. Kinda your rover, uh, roving lab-porter. And I'd 'courage all you other pups out there in cyber land to do the same. Get on yer 'puter and give us the scoop on what's happenin in your hood. Think the Karen lady should think bout givin us pups our own place on Pet Talk to bark bout what's goin on in our lives as WE see it. Sometimes I think mom strrrrretches the truth bout what goes on here and equal time is only fair!! So here's my Star Flash for the day. Well, where was I. Oh yeah. Well first, mom may have told you already. Last week we were all dragged down to doc Paul's in the BIG bye-bye thing with the spinning wheels and a nasty metal cage inside that keeps me from jumpin on her head while she's navigatin the torpedo. I admit it. I did enjoy jumping on her and taking the wheel when I was a youngster. Mom would absolutely turn purple and scream I was gonna be the death of us all, or somethin like that, whatever that means. Anyway, it was Cody girl who was feeling under the weather this time, but I went along to supervize and make sure the Cody girl was treated ok. Somebody's gotta be in charge; mom's always a WRECK and things can get pretty hairy with her in charge. Cody girl had a reel ruff early life and is a little fraid of the doc's ya know, so I'ze gotta protect her. So, anyway, we had to leave the Cody girl there for exreys cuz she was limpin on her leg bad. They gave her sumethin to make her snooze for a long time and took pictures of her. Kinda cool. Later that night he told mom she has hip displayzuh or somethin. Mom was real sad and started drippin water from her eyeballs. But the doc told her not to worry too much and, as usual, was handin her a white thing to blow all that ropey wet stuff outta her nose. When we got FINALLY got home it was way dark cauz we waited so long to pay the ransom to spring her outta that place. When we got back to the cave, Cody was reeel wobbly, kinda like dad after a big party, and mom did a lot of fussin with her. I was starvin myself and treated myself to a bite to eat from the cat dish when she wasn't lookin. Mom bit her lip real hard at that, but didn't lose it for once, then sat me down and said in that kinda low voice that things were gonna be a lot different around here for a while! Ut Oh, I'm thnkin. Well, let me tell ya, life sure HAS changed round her since then. Mom keeps tellin me to "knock it off" a lot. (I think I do a pretty good job of that already, ya know, vases, lamps, other 'spensive things) and stop "horsin around" when me and the Cody girl play. Horsin around??? Horse??? HORSE??? Do I look like a horse??? Boy, I think she's really comin unglued. Anywho, there' lots of time outs and doggie down time here now. Ya know, me and the Codymister sittin on our beds (I prefer the couch myself) watchin the tube and evissseratin' the guts outta our squeaky toys. So, last night we were tryin to be good girls. Mom set us up in the livin room with the tube and lab-mote while she was cookin up some yummies for her and dad in the room where the treasured trash is kept. I was crusin the channels when I saw sumthin that made my eyes POP OUT OF MY HEAD!! Mind you, it takes a LOT to shock a trash hound like me when it comes to doggie antics!! So, here's the news anckor dude sayin somethin about a pooch that had swallowed a fifteen inch surrrrrrated nife!!! The whole thing! And lived to bark about it! Now I've downed some pretty wierd things in my day. Once mom took me to get exreyed after lots of pukin', yakin and di-a-poopies. Doc Paul showed her the exreys and said sumthin bout "multiple foreign objects." Mom's eyes got reeeel big as he pointed out the bird skull, bone bits, rocks, sand and sumthin called an action hero figure in my gut. Like Cinder, I got the lube job treatment pronto. And mom said if I didn't poop it all out like reeeel quick I was going under the nife. That made me dump a big load reeeeel fast. Pheeeew. That was a close one. But geeeeeeeeeeeez!! What was THIS dude thinkin of!? They showed the pics like they took of Cody. Ya know, the exreys to prove it. And there he sat, this border collie type pooch, just panting and smilin for the camera, showing off his zippered stomach, hammin it up for the camera and enjoyin his 5 minutes of fame. Even I'm not THAT desprit for attention!! Dad says he thinks they outta put this one in ripley's sumthin or other and that this outta teach me a lesson too. So, can ya believe it??? Well, that's all my news for now. I'll keep "rovin" the world for more stories from doggiedom to share with you all on....."Star Flash!!!!" Bye for now!!! RUFFFFF! RUFFFFF!

[This message has been edited by tatsxxx11 (edited January 27, 2001).]

[This message has been edited by tatsxxx11 (edited January 27, 2001).]

[Phred]

Hi, Star Lab; hey, you type good. Oh; Cinder here...

I need ta know sumpthin about what you said 'bout unyins - are they BAD for us? I jest know Dad would never do anything to hurt us, but he lets me nibble on his sammiches an' they almost allways have unyins on 'em. How much unyins is bad for us? I don't wanna act *prissy* an' not take the snackers that Dad offers, but I sure don't wanna hafta stay at Doktor Mike's Hopsbital. I went there onest time and came home with sore tummy and a zipper in it. Don't want that ta happen 'cause of an unyins treat.

An' how on Earth did you get all them "forrin objeks" into your tummie? Sum of that stuff dosen't sound all that yummie to me!

Tell us whatcha know, Star Lab. /s/ Cinder

[tatsxxx11]

Hey Cinder! Cool!! Can't believe I'm really talkin to the ***REAL STAR***!! Sounds like you three been thru quite a bit there at yer den!! Just let me say, it's a pleasure to shake your paw! So, dad's been feedin ya unyins!! OK by me! But mom's been doin lots a 'vestigatin on this here 'puter and seems the jury is in on this un! Seems if we pups eat a lot of the stinky balls, like one er two a day for a week or 2, we start losing those red things floatin in our blood. Even a little unyins in our food, as a regular thing, can make us kinda punky and puky. I think doc Paul called it aneemeia, or, wait mom says to spell it right, OK, anemia. Chronic anemia at that! It won't make us suddenly keel over with our feet pointin up all stiff- like (like the dreaded chocolate) but still, not a good idea. Dad use to give us veggie leftovers and salad with lots a unyins. No more!! Mom wasn't sure the other day just how much was legal, ah, lethal, but, as usual, she's always frettin and thinkin the worse so a course she had to call doc Paul STAT!! He said it was cool...don't sweat it. Maybe a belly ache, some barfin, a few stinky ~air biscuits~ or two, but nuttin like a lab-mergency. Anywho, and trust me Cind, this ain't eazy for me so say, after all I am a lab, but from one great pup to another, I think it's a good idea to lay off the stinky things and stick to sumthin safe on those sandwitches like lots of roast beef and turkey!! Might set a good example for the Kid too. Last thing he needs is a belly ache and more poop-eroni!! And Cind, let me tell ya, you are one great bud to the Kid...and dad!! Hope Hannah's poem gave dad and a gentle shove in the right deee-rection!! I always thought a trio sounded better than a duet anyway! I love ya Cinder. Give that Stray Kid a big sloppy kiss from one beautiful blond labrador babe! Catch ya later Cind. Keep the Kid safe; dad too. Your Pal, Star

[RachelJ]

Hey Star, it's me Hannah!
Now you can understand why the two leggers are all so enthralled with Cinder. She is such a likeable sort. You can't even be ticked off with her because they are such dribbling idiots over all her adventures. I know, I know, WE had to spend a whole evening trying our best to think of names for the potential sibling and you read what MY mom said, didn't you? "We love Cinder like one of our own"!!! What is THAT?

But when you read the Cinder updates, you can't help liking that little GS. She just goes through life just like the rest of us, trying to do the best she can and figure out what's it all about. No pretense with her and she has opened the door for the rest of us to get more puter time. Plus, I don't think you have to worry about your Mom! If there ever were adored pups, it's you and Cody! I would dare to say you two have it preeetty good! So thanks for giving us the lowdown on what's going on at your house. I'm up for learning a few new tricks, if you get my drift!!! I'm not talking about any of that sit-stay BS either.

Well, time to take off. Got get to the Big Bed first so I can get the best spot. Late comers have to take what left.

signed: Hannah, Queen of the Couch

[tatsxxx11]

Hey Hannah...Did you get the Big Bed!!?? Gotta grab your "seat" round her pretty darn quick too! Mom's still not ready to go out and play yet and I don't know what she waitin for. So I'm just sittin here twiddlin my paws munchin on a stray krunchie, plannin my busy day an thought I'd say woof! Yeah, the Cinder Girl is pretty darn cool. The Kid too. Wish dad could send us a shot of the dynamic duo in action. Mom's always snivlin bout some pup or critter somewhere anyway so I should be use to it and join the fan club. Hope today the Kid has things under control, if you get my ~~~~~drift~~~~~~~~~~!!!! Yo, Cinder, Stray Kid, an all a youz out there. Grab your beds and blankets, the ree-mote and some vittles, and forget that bowl thing game they're all yakkin bout! Tonight me and the Codster's watchin our fave flick! BABE!!! Now that's a piggie with attitude!! La, la, la, la, la!!! All kinds a great critters, antics and action! Me and my buds here at the den give it 2 BIG paws up! Stray and Cinder, you crazy kids would just love this one! Yeah, yeah, I know....Another reason for mom to flush her eyeballs out. She really has to get a grip! Well, don't know bouts you guys, but I'm bout ready to jump outta my fur waitin to hear how Cinder and Co. made it through the night! Cind, you there???? Yo, Cind? Oh well, I'm puttin kibble on the kid that he made it through without a "whiff" a trouble! But geeez, it if they put me through the ringer like that kid's been, gee, I'd be spilling my guts all over the place too! Well, gotta jet. Here my mom perkalatin the black stuff....breakfast is a comin!! Yeah! Give a holler later guys... .your friend Star

[tatsxxx11]

Hey Cinder...forget to 'splain bout the "multiple foreign objects" thing...As mom puts it, my breed is "genetically predisposed to the ingestion of all things of this earth, regardless of their chemical composition or potentially detremental effects to my anatomy!" Phew, that's a mouthful!! specially as a pup...man, I couldn't keep anything outta my mouth and sometimes, well, "down the hatch" as they say! Just didn't wanna give it up....and of course, I'm a hunter by nature so everything movin's fair game. Me and the group live by the ocean so lots a sand, crunchie things to munch on like crabs and snails and of course my all time fave, rolling on dead things, specially seagulls and rotting fish. After all that hard work, of course a quick snack is in order. Mom walks away fast yellin oooooooh no!!! and looks like she's gonna upchuck. Gotta give her credit tho. She still let's me kiss her on the mouth. So there you have it... hope it helps. It's not a lifestyle for everyone, but, suits me fine! Poor mom though, she says I'll never grow outa my terrible twos. See, I just want to retrieve everything, and lots atimes they just taste good goin down! Catcha later....Star

[Phred]

Cinder to the Star*Burst~

Rats, big time! Dad went off to a Bowl Party and dint say notin' bout the Pig on the TV box. Ida pounded the cliker keys till the box lit up if idda known that show was on.

I gots ta stat up in the house again, but the Kid was tied to my time-out wall inna basement cause Dad still doesn't trust his poddy habbits. The cellar door was open so's I could keep the Smoke comp'ny, but I spent most of the nite loungin' upstairs with the Kat. Like Hannah, I like the BigBed and katch sum Zzz's on there, too. The Smokey Kid kinda likes Dad's Kliner Chair, but Dad doesn't like ta share unless he's (Dad) onna bottom with the FurKid on the lap.

Hey Star*, how'd the Pig do? He came out on top, dint he?

/s/ Cinder & Friends

[tatsxxx11]

Hey Cinder Dog! Star Burst here! Boy, you sure got me pegged! I'm just "bursting" out all over, all the time!! From too much food, too much energy, and, ah, if I do say so myself, too much pride, sometimes, or so my mom says!! Wow, am I syched!! The Kid got a name!! And some fancy, long falutin handle it is, too! "On top of old Smokey..." la, la, la, la, la..well, you know the tune, Cind. Gotta teach it to the Kid, ah, SMOKEY! Every mutt's gotta have a theme song! Mine is "Twinkle, twinkle, little..." Bit babyish for a sophisticated young lady such as myself, but mom LOVES to sing it to me when I'm catching some zzzzzz's. Ugh! What us pooches won't tolerate to pleeze um!! And it's all official....the Kid's now a permanent rez-eee-dent there at "dad's den!" How cool!! Seems all Smokey's fizical fix-its are all progessing smoothly, so me and the Codster are reeeel happy to hear that. Geee, Cind, gotta tell dad ta check the listings before checking out for the nite. Yeah, of course, the little piggie sure did turn out being the hero in the end. Kinda bought a tear to the ole eye seeing how the ole farmer fella was won over by the little critter. Kinda reminds me a you, dad and the now famous Smokey saga!! I just LOVE a happy ending! And that chorus of singing meeces (you know, lots a mouse kids) la, la, la-ing just cracks me up! Well, gotta get off this thing to hunt down mom for vittles. If you can believe it, as if I didn't have to fight for every ounce a attention as it is, mom went out today and got HERSELF a pig. Not the Babe kind. She's yappin somethin bout a "guinea pig?" What the heck is that??? All I know is me and the Codster and Mr. B the cat are goin BONKER NUTS smellin out the critter and trying to locate it's, well location! She stuffed it in some kinda clear ball thing that it runs around in and I wanna chase it sooooo bad! Anywho, just what I needed Cinder Dog, more competition for mom's attention. From a rodent, no less!! But, she went to the animal shelter today and just couldn't come home empty pawed, if you know what I mean. Geeez, even the thing's name is cute..."Squeekers" Hmmmmm.....sounds like one those stuffed things I love to play with! Well Cinder Dog, you now got a bro; it's all official and legal like!! Once they put that rabies ID thingy on ya, your THEIRS!! Between you and me Cind, I think next ta gettin you girl, it's probably the second best thing he ever done! And just one more thing, Cinder Dog...YEAH!!!!!!!!! Big hugs to the now official Smokey, brother of Cinder the Wonder Dog!! (And of course to dad too, without whom all of this would not be possible!

[RachelJ]

It's me, Hannah, I just thought I'd check in now that Cinder has dug her own grave and officially got herself a brudder! Sure hope it works out for her. I still say I was meant to be an only child, but Daisy kind of saw through me and I have to admit there are some advantages to having a goof ball boy around. I will list a few.

Say I went outside and got real busy chasing squirrels and barking at some other critter I smelled in the vicinity, and I came back in forgetting what mom sent me out there for and then a wet spot mysteriously appears on the carpet, and mom finds it and starts screaming about "Who PEED in the house, You don't PEE in the HOUSE, You pee OUTSIDE!" Well, I act real cool and relaxed and simply with one turn of my head look directly at Tucker!

Say I don't want to be bothered and mom gets in one of her kissy face modes, Tucker is right there to sop up them kisses and I can avoid all them smooches and hugs. YUK!

Say Mom thinks I have enough toys and I don't think so, I can just take Tucker's.

Say I want to play with mom or get some extra treats, I enlist Tucker to help with the pestering. Two pests are better than one.

Geez, that is all I can come up with right now. This list isn't as long as I thought. I sure hope Cinder didn't make a big mistake. Anyways Mom says we are celebrating tonight because Smokey has a forever home. Wish me luck with sneaking some laps of her glass of wine.

[RachelJ]

It's Hannah again. Star, I got a song too.
It is sung to the tune of "Summertime" and it goes like this.

Krunchie time and the nibbling is easy,
Krunchie time and the Krunchies are good.
Your dad's a poodle, your mom's a cocker spaniel.
Hush pretty puppy, now don't you whine.

The good part is when she sings it, it means we are going to be fed. The bad part is .....she can't sing!!!

[tatsxxx11]

Oh Hannah, we all have our crosses to bear! But I still love your song, if not the sing-ING! And I say, us pooches NEVER have enough toys!! And two pesterers are ALWAYS better than one. Star's laws # 1 and 2!! Amen! Love you Hannah and Tucker, Love you Cinder and Smokey....Lots a licks, Star and Cody.

[Daisy's Mom]

Hey guys it's Daisy! My Mommy always howls that old song that goes
"Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer true.
I'm half crazy, all for the love of you!
It won't be a stylish marriage,
I can't afford a carriage.
But you'll look sweet
Upon the seat
Of a bicicle built for two!"
That song always calms me down. But when she howls "You Ain't Nothin' But a Hound Dog," I just HAVE to howl along. And it's okay when Mommy howls it 'cuz she's in choruses and stuff so she howls good. But when HER mommy tries to howl it... ouch! But 'cuz I love her, I just smile and wag...

[tatsxxx11]

Hey...Daisy....Star here. I think you're song's SO funny. Aren't our hoomins silly sometimes?? I think it's good you wag your tail and smile. It makes them feel special like. You should hear the one she sings to my sister Cody!! Oy! It's sung to the old Rawhide TV show theme song! Goes sorta like

Cody, Cody, Cody, they call her Camping
Cody, cause she's a Cody Cowgirl, Codyhide
Through rain and wind and weather
She and mommy camp together
She'll be waitin at the end of my ride
She's Codyhide!

I think it's cause in the summer we all camp out in our woods and make a campfire. I have to cover my ears with my paws...Catcha later kids. Off to play and steal food. I think mom's baking something, I smell~~~~~~~~butter!!! Ummmm!

[tatsxxx11]

Hi Cinder, Smoke, Hannah, Daisy, all you pals and pups. It's me. Star, your "star" reporter, here to scoop you the poop on some cool cannine happinins round my hood and the resta doggiedom.

First up, me and my gang were checkin out the news the other night, when ALERT!!! Doggie story comin up next! Well, natch my ears perked way up and my eye's started buggin out. What would it be??? I grabbed my pad and crayon. Well, turns out next thing I see on the glass thing is this lady with this cute little guy, kinda a sheltie, sheepherdin, scruffie type mix. Reel cute. Turns out the lad wouldn't let up lickin and pawin at his mom's neck. Same spot, all the time. She finally had enuf a that, and after a few days a gettin aggrevated, felt around where the kid kept lickin. Turns out it was a small lumpy thing that turned out to be kinda bad. But the doc took the lump away fast and fixed her up and now the kids a hero and the mom's all better!!

And did I tell ya bout a local celebrity pup from my town ? "Shadow," the Kiss, (or is it Keeshound?) was walkin one day by the deep, wet hole near his den with his mom, and well, kinda took off, scurryin way cross the big hole covered with krunchie water. Woops! Through the krunchie water he fell. Now, he's quite a furry, fuzzy, little guy and couldn't swim and was all frantik like and yelpin! But, his mom screaned and ran for help and a nice person called Phred's type of people in red hats who came with a big red thingy on wheels, with bells and flashin lites and a ladder thing and lots a strings and WOW!!! The Phred type people saved him!!! Boy, what a crowd was watchin that one. Everyone cheered, but his mom most of all who was drippin all kids a wet stuff from her face. Shadow was on TV and in the paper and everything! The hero phred type guys too. They were reeeel cool. My mom got to "meet" the little guy when his mom dropped him off at her kennel for a tubbie and a blow dry! She said he's a great sweet boy, and all dry now. Swimmin lessons are slated for spring!!

For my last report, well, it's a heart melter. My mom said she was at the little food store and outside a real hansome kid, collie/shep type I think, sittin there all well behaved (there's that phrase again!!) with wet, sandy paws, lettin all pet him and stuff. Of course my nosey mom had to ask EVERYONE in the store who owned the doggie. Finally she found the dad, who couldn't stop talkin bout his beautiful dog "Spirit," a 14 year old senior who didn't look a day over 6! Turns out 5 years ago "Spirit" and his dad were walkin on a snowy day, no rope thing on him. Dad walked across the street with "Spirit" followin behind. Up comes a BIG truck who started slidin and couldn't stop in time, tho he tried, and poor pup got hit bad...broke his back. The dog doc said forget it...Makin a zipper to fix him would cost too much, the pup's too old, won't probably live through the cuttin they'de have to do, and if he did, won't be able to hardly walk resta his life. But dad said no. I owe him this chance, it was my fault not havin the rope thing on him. And besides, I didn't name him "Spritit" for nuthin! Well, 5 years later, not only did the tough little kid make it, but, well, just lookin at his sandy, wet paws tells it all. "Spirit" healed 100% and is still frolickin and rompin through the sand and water with his beloved dad. Just like a kid again! It's enought to make you just howl with happiness for the story of "Spirit," the dog with a heart and the dad who loved him!! Remember, behind every pup, there's a story! Mom says that's why she's always bein a pain to people, prakticlly RUNNING after them to ask about their dog and if she can pet um. CAN BE just a TAD embarassin!!

OH, OH, OH!!! Don't forget. Grab your pupcorn and jump on the couch!! Tonite on the CNBC channel thingy there's a show on National Geographic Explorrer called "TOP DOG!" All about my life!... Just pullin your paw...It's really about what's the story with all those doggies who wanna be the "top dog" at that show mom's yappin bout, ah, Westweiner??? No, Westminster! Yeah that's it! Don't know what the big deal is. Buncha snobs if you ask me, but, kinda neat to see all those pups in one big backyard. Anywho, tonight, 8pm, CNBC!

That's it for now....This is Star, your "star" reporter, first with the scoop on the poop!! Catcha later!

[This message has been edited by tatsxxx11 (edited February 04, 2001).]

[RachelJ]

Hannah checking in. This is too freaky. First Mom says I'm a lot like you and then I read the bit about your Mom hounding the hounds which is just what my Mom does! Dad is the one who gets embarassed. I just get ticked off! She has ME, the beautiful, gorgeous and most fantastic Hannah! What else in life does she need? I represent and fulfill all that a two legger would ever need or want and yet she's always running up to one or another scraggy mutt and starts talking to them like they are something important, asking their name, how old they are, on and on and on.

I watched the whole dog show last year, well almost the whole show. Mom got tired and wanted to go to bed, so she turned off the TV even though I was still watching it. She puts my doggie bed near the TV but has a fit when I start scratching on the screen because I want to get in there with the other dogs. She says I'm not a purebred so I can't compete. Ha. They don't want me to compete because I am so beautiful I would make them other dogs look pitiful! Thanks for the reminder about the show though. Someone around here gets a little forgetful once in a while - we missed the Babe movie because of it too.