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Thread: Wacky Warning Labels

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2002
    Location
    Riding my bike somewhere...
    Posts
    26,408

    Wacky Warning Labels

    You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
    Fritos
    Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted.
    Sign at Railroad Station

    Cannot be made non-poisonous.
    Windshield Wash Fluid

    Caution: Do not use this hammer to strike any solid object.
    Hammer

    Caution: Hot beverages are hot!
    Coffee Cup

    Caution: Never drive with the cover on your windshield
    Automobile Windshield cover:

    Caution: The contents of this bottle should not be fed to fish
    Dog Shampoo

    Choking hazard: This toy is a small ball.
    Rubber Ball

    Directions: Use like regular soap
    Dial soap

    Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals.
    Swedish chain saw

    Do not dangle the mouse by its cable or throw the mouse at co-workers.
    SGI computer

    Do not drive car or operate machinery.
    Children's cough medicine

    Do not eat toner.
    Laser Printer Cartridge

    Do not eat urinal cakes.
    Rest Stop in Wisconsin

    Do not light the flame near the face.
    Cigarette Lighter

    Do not look into laser with remaining eye.
    Laser Pointer

    Do not pour liquids into your television set.
    Television Owner’s Manual

    Do not put lit candles on phone.
    Cordless Phone

    Do not recharge, put in backwards, or use.
    Battery

    Do not turn upside down. (printed on bottom of the box)
    Tesco's Tiramisu dessert

    Do not use for drying pets.
    Microwave Oven

    Do not use intimately.
    Deodorant

    Do not use orally after using rectally.
    Electronic Thermometer

    Do not use orally.
    Toilet Bowl Cleaning Brush

    Fits one head.
    Hotel Shower Cap

    For external use only!
    Curling Iron

    For indoor or outdoor use only.
    Christmas lights

    For lifting purposes only
    Car Jack

    If swallowed or lodged in ear or nose see doctor.
    Ray-O-Vac Renewal AA Batteries

    If you are seated in an exit aisle and are unable to read this, please ask a stewardess to reseat you.
    Cayman Airlines safety booklet

    Instructional video on hooking up your VCR included.
    VCR

    Keep out of children.
    Korean Kitchen Knives

    Not dishwasher safe.
    TV Remote Control

    Not for human consumption.
    Package of Dice

    Not for weight control.
    Breath Savers

    Not to be used as a personal flotation device.
    6x10 inch inflatable picture frame

    Not to be used as protection from a tornado.
    blanket from Taiwan

    Not to be used for the other use.
    Japanese food processor

    Open packet and eat contents.
    Pack of Peanuts

    PARENT: Please exercise caution—mask and chest plate are not protective; cape does not enable wearer to fly.
    Bat Man The Animated Series Armor Set

    Peel fruit from cellophane before eating.
    Fruit Roll-ups

    Please store in the cold section of the refrigerator.
    Grapes

    Product will be hot after heating.
    Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding

    Remember: Objects in mirror are actually behind you.
    Bike Helmet Mirror

    Remove used tampon before inserting a new one.
    Tampax Tampons

    Serving suggestion: Defrost.
    Swann frozen dinners

    Theft of this container is a crime.
    Milk Crate

    There shall be three (3) access levels with level 4 being the highest level.
    Fire Alarm System

    This camera only works when there is film inside.
    Camera

    This cape does not give the wearer the ability to fly.
    Halloween Superman Costume

    THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.
    Insect Spray from New Zealand

    Twist top off with hands. Throw top away. Do not put top in mouth.
    Soft Drink

    Use caution when using near fire, flame, or sparks.
    Fireplace Lighter

    USE EXTREME CAUTION when stretching cord over load. Keep face and other vulnerable body parts away from potential cord rebound path.
    Bungee cord

    USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.
    Taiwanese shampoo

    Warning - this spray is harmful to bees
    Insect Spray

    Warning! Never iron clothes on the body.
    Rowenta Iron

    Warning: contains nuts
    Sainsbury's Peanuts

    Warning: do not use if you have prostate problems.
    Midol PMS

    WARNING: Do not use in shower. Never use while sleeping.
    Conair Pro Style 1600 hair dryer

    Warning: Do not use on eyes.
    Heated Seat Cushion

    Warning: drug may cause sleepiness.
    Sleeping Pill Prescription

    Warning: Flame may cause fire.
    Butane Lighter

    Warning: has been found to cause cancer in laboratory mice.
    Rat Poison

    Warning: knives are sharp!
    Sharpening Stone

    Warning: may cause drowsiness.
    Nytol

    Warning: May contain small parts.
    Frisbee

    WARNING: Not for use as earplugs.
    Silly Putty

    Warning: Pastry Filling May Be Hot When Heated.
    Pop-Tarts

    Warning: Remove child before folding baby stroller.
    Baby Stroller

    Warning: This product can burn eyes
    Curling Iron

    I found theese really amusing.

    ~Kay, Athena, Ace, Kiara, Mufasa, & Alice!
    "So baby take a axe to your makeup kit
    Set ablaze the billboards and their advertisements
    Love with all your hearts and never forget
    How good it feels to be alive
    And strive for your desire"

    -rx bandits

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2002
    Location
    Off to the races....
    Posts
    11,252
    LOL! People are so dumb! You know those labels are there cause somebody sued!

    I honestly saw on a box of popsicles a warning that contents were could and could freeze to the tongue. Allow to warm slighly before eating!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Location
    Santa Paula, CA
    Posts
    27,648
    LOL Thanks for sharing.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2002
    Location
    Richmond, BC
    Posts
    4,260
    I copied those to send to my friends.. they are too funny!

  5. #5
    ROFL!
    Thanks for sharing. I'm still laughing!
    Mom of 5 dogs, 6 cats, a bird, and a donkey!
    http://www.imagestation.com/album/?id=4291557495


  6. #6
    Join Date
    Feb 2001
    Location
    Happy Valley, Utah
    Posts
    12,552
    LOL those are great. I always think the "no purchase necessary, details inside" is dumb. So can you just open the bag of chips in the store, see if you are a winner, then leave them there? lol.

    I've noticed that the 2 liter bottles of soda now say "do not point toward face" or something like that......you know the only reason they say that is because some dumb nut shook it up, pointed it at their own face, then sued them I bet.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Aug 2001
    Location
    Columbia, MD
    Posts
    4,113
    That list is hilarious


  8. #8
    Join Date
    May 2001
    Location
    Eslöv, Sweden
    Posts
    2,103
    While a lot of those are funny, I gotta point out that all the ones that originated from outside of America aren't correct. For examples, there are NO chainsaws in Sweden that says "do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals". My father works with chainsaws a lot and I've seen plenty of them and I KNOW that it would never have such a warning label. The person who made this list either just translated it completely wrong or simply totally made it up. The same goes for the Japanese and the Korean ones. I guess they can get away with that because most people just laugh and think "oh, those wierd countries".

    The ones that originated from America though do crack me up. Especially when I realize that there have been people who has sued about those things. Like the woman who sued McDonalds for having too hot coffee, that's why they have labels like that. I guess, in a way it's not funny, but pretty sad to see how stupid people really can be.

    Please sign my guestbook if you have the time

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Location
    Ohio, USA
    Posts
    19,879
    very funny

    Huney, Bon & Simba-missed so very much
    Remembering all the Rainbow Bridge Pets

  10. #10
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Location
    Warner Robins/Statesboro Georgia
    Posts
    2,373
    LOL!!

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Jul 2002
    Location
    Ohio
    Posts
    2,166
    Those are halarious! Thanks for sharing. It's so crazy what these people have to warn against just to protect themselves from getting sued!

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