6 month bday and Presley's sister

[Presley]

OK... Please don't scream at me but I need to get your opinion..

Today was the first day I have spoke to Presley's sister owner for any length of time.. Usually it is Yes no yes no and goodbye kinda talks. But today we spoke and she asked me what I was up to. I told her I was hanging around the pool with Presley and playing with her and so on... She told me that I should bring the kiddy pool up to her place tomorrow and we can have a little party for there 6months tomorrow cause November is kinda cold for the pool... I said I would need to think about it..
I am unsure of what to do.. Presley was so scared of these people last time they were over. I miss my friend so much. It is selfish of me to want to be friends with her but i do miss her. I know Presley has a blast playing with her sister and their other lab. I don't know if i should take her over there......

so confused...
Melissa & Presley

[tatsxxx11]

Hi Melissa! That's a tough one! You are sure that it is the parents of Presely's sister that she (Presley) is afraid of??? That their presence may have been the cause of her seizures? I would really hesitate introducing her to that situation again. Do you have any concrete evidence that they may have treated her harshly? I wish there were some way that you could come clean with her, and tell her your fears. Maybe you could say that for some unknown reason, Presley seems to fear them. Dogs often do have a negative reaction to people/places etc. for no known reason. Maybe you could suggest that she drop off P's sister at your house for a day at the pool for starters? And you could, on another day, spend time with your friend so she doesn't feel slighted? I'm not sure how close you are with these people. I also don't think you can avoid them forever without letting them know how you feel. I think you would feel better if you could talk about the situation with her. I hate thinking the dogs are missing out on the fun of being together; or you losing a friend! Lets see what some others think! Sandra

[Presley]

Hi,
Yes I do know they have done stuff to her and some of what they did. I also do know she fears them, Last time they were over she tucked her tail,was crawling on the ground and she was shaking very badly (the vet says that was most likly a seizure).
She knows that Presley fears them and I have made that clear in the past. She also asked me if i thought Presley could handle coming over there and i said i didn't know.
I do feel bad for this whole thing because we were all very close.
We went away on trips together and we spend like 2-3 evenings a week together before all this happened. In July I am going away to a horse clinic with their one son and my friend.. We spend Xmas/New Years/B-Days/Easter/Any holiday together.. Her kids would spend the night over here all the time. I don't even have kids, Their one son is like my own.... I just don't know what to do...I don't think I could ever forget what happened.

Melissa & Presley

[Gio]

What a horrible situation you're in. I can't tell you what to do but I can tell you what I would do. If any of my pets were so afraid of someone I would not have the heart of putting them through that experience again. I tend to be a touch overprotective when it comes to my pets and this comes from someone who feels more at ease in the company of animals than other people's. On the other hand I also know how heart breaking losing a friendship can be and why this thought hurts you so much. My thoughts are with you.

[anna_66]

Originally posted by Presley

Yes I do know they have done stuff to her and some of what they did. I also do know she fears them

Sorry if I sound rude, but if they did something bad to Presley, personally I wouldn't want to be around them, let alone let my dog who had seizures (maby, partly due to this-because I don't know what happened) have to be around them. I say, if it's your friend and you want to spend time with her, great! Just tell her you don't think Presley could handle it, that way you don't have to hurt her feelings. Hope I didn't sound too harsh

[Presley]

No anna you don't sound harsh.. I know where you are coming from and I too didn't want anything to do with them at all.. I feel like i'm stuck in the middle because she wont just leave me alone. After this happened my call display would show her calling me 5 to 20 times a day. I don't want to let Presley see them.. But she already did once at the beach and she acted the same way then. We live in a small town so I am bound to run into one of them....
I just thought maybe if she seen them and it was a nice experiance then things might be ok and Presley might be more excepting... Oh well I think we will just stay home anyways..

Melissa & Presley

[lizbud]

Presley's Mom,

Do you mind telling us just what exactly they
did to Presley? Did someone(who?)scold her or
correct some behavior to harshly? If they have
different ideas about raising an animal than you
do, you'll always be at odds over the dog.Guess
I'm just trying to figure what exactly (they?)
did. A difference of methods can be discussed
and they mustlet you decide what's best.But if
they did something that was just cruel & mean, I
would not ever let Presley be around them ever.
Don't really understand enough to offer any
other help.

[Dixieland Dancer]

Hi Melissa!
I would be very cautious around Presley's sister owners. I can understand that you miss your friend but is it possible to find other friends who share your love of dogs. Perhaps joining a obedience club or something like that can help.


If you do take Presley around them, proceed cautiously. Make sure you are paying close attention to her and at the first sign of uncomfortable feelings in her, GET HER OUT OF THERE! When it comes to my dogs, I trust their judgement and if they don't like someone it is usually for good reason. Presley doesn't feel this way for no reason. Perhaps being outdoors will help instead of being confined to a room.

Let us know what you decide.

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Presley
Hi,
Yes I do know they have done stuff to her and some of what they did. I also do know she fears them, Last time they were over she tucked her tail,was crawling on the ground and she was shaking very badly (the vet says that was most likly a seizure).

To me the risk of putting an animal in this situation and possibly triggering another seizure is not worth being nice to the ones who cause it. I know sadly, from personal experience that seizures can be fatal. I'd just tell them it's the vet's orders; she is not to be around them. If I wanted to socialize with them myself, it would have to be outside of the home like a restaraunt or something where Presley would not be. Good luck on whatever you decide.

[Presley]

Greetings...
I just wanted to let you all know that no Presley will not be going over there. Either will I... I spoke to my friend this morning and told her that i didn't think it would be a good idea. She basically told me i'm spoiling Presley(Which yes she is but this isn't one of those cases) and that letting her get use to them again would be good for her. I said last two times she seen you guys she tucked her tail, crawled and shaked badly. I wasn't going to let her keep having those bad experiences... I don't care about my friendship with her anymore.. She doesn't understand what they did to my dog.. This really makes me angry because I thought she understood. I thought she would face up to what they did but she still says no, That the one who told me all this lied.. I also am not dealing with her phone calls anymore and blocked out her phone #'s.

Sorry I would not like to go into what happened but think the worst and you are probably not far off.. Yes i am taking it that their methods of punishment are Far different then mine..
I don't yell at Presley, nor have i ever spanked her...

Also the vet and breeder both told me not to take her around them again because she will never forget...

sorry
Melissa & Presley

[momoffuzzyfaces]

Originally posted by Presley
I thought she would face up to what they did but she still says no, That the one who told me all this lied.. Also the vet and breeder both told me not to take her around them again because she will never forget...

The person who told you may have lied but Presley isn't lying. Her behavior speaks volumns. The vet and breeder are right. I know this has been hard on you. It's evident from your posts, how much you love Presley. I'm so glad you have that precious animal now and she won't have to be afraid anymore.

[Albea]

Melissa:
I think you're doing the best thing for Presley by keeping her away from those people. Besides, do you really want to be friendly with individuals who mistreat a dog? If this sounds harsh, so be it. I'm sure the two of you will have plenty of fun without exposing her to any more terrifing experiences.

[anna_66]

Melissa, I hope you know and understand that we are not trying to be mean. We just care for you and Presley's welfare! Your part of the "family"!

[Tanya&Fritz]

What horrible people. I'll never understand how someone could hurt a dog. You're not spoiling Presley, you just love him. I'm so glad you're not going over there.

[lizbud]

Melissa,


Please, there's no need explain any more about Presley's
treatment by these people.I think I get the picture now.
Just want to say that I agree with your decision not to let
them around Presley anymore.Taking Presley to more classes
& other events with you will help her gain more self confidence.
That , and just being allowed to grow & mature naturally,
without having to be involved with them at all.I think you are
a better Momma to Presley, than they will ever know.Give
Presley Hugs from Liz & Buddy.