HELP HELP HELP!!!! How Long till I really KNOW my Cat??

[cruisetime]

Meka is driving us nuts!!! First few days she explored but was content to stay with us and even liked being on my lap.. She had just gotten spayed so I'm sure she was in pain. Then she started getting playful and fun and NO LAP time- she didn't want it. Then she started pushing EVERY button she can think of to irritate us - doing everything including biting and scratching and getting on everything and and and and - she ran out the door to the garage AGAIN! THis time she ran out under hubby's truck (the garage door was down) and I had to soak her with the squirt gun for her to run and she ran right back in the house so I know she knows she is suppose to be there..... HELP HELP HELP!!! Hubby told me last night to just leave her out there! Matter of fact to just put her outside and oh well...... He was tired of her and stressed out already on other stuff... When do I know her actual personality and what she will be like... It has only been 6 weeks. Vet said she is 2-1/2 years old but she acts 6 weeks old!!! Maybe she never had a kittenhold (childhood) and when she feels safe now she is having fun??????????? HELP!!!! Debbie

[Tubby & Peanut's Mom]

Debbie, it will take time and...well...even after you think you know them they go and pull stunts that surprise the bejeezez out of you!

Cats do pick up on your stress and will act out on it, so it sounds like that might be what's happening. Is what she's doing really all that terrible that you have to keep at her? I only ask because maybe the best thing to do would be to just ignore her. Or, another option might be to confine her to one room for time outs when she is naw-tee. This might be the better option because then she can do whatever she wants in that one room so she is less stressed, and you and hubby don't have to constantly keep watching her so you are less stressed.

Even 2 1/2 year old cats have a lot of play in them. MUCH less than a kitten, but they're not sofa slugs by any means at 2 1/2. My only other suggestion would be to get her a playmate - as in another kitty - but I don't know if that would be the best thing for you right now.

Play with her, keep her entertained, get her a cat tree to climb on, etc. But DO NOT just put her outside! That would be the absolute worse thing in the world you could do and would solve nothing. As for being in the garage, there's no problem with that either as long as you know she's there and remove her before moving any of the vehicles. Tubby ADORES being in the garage with his Daddy.

Anyway, if you're all stressed for other reasons, my advice to just have patience isn't very good advice at all, but I know with time she will settle in and you will get to know her better too.

[QueenScoopalot]

Have you considered getting a second kitty for Meka to redirect her energy, and occasional aggression? Something to consider.

[catnapper]

I hear your dilemma... but as Jan suggested (and I thought yesterday) a second cat would really make a huge difference for her behavior. I see what it did for Allen, and many other here on PT had a lonely cat, then when they added a second one, they saw an improvement in their first cat's temperment and mannerisms. Hubby might balk at the concept, but HONESTLY, once you have two cats, you'll wonder why you didn't get two right away.

[cruisetime]

Debbie - thank you so much for any incite you can give me. As for what she is doing that we stay on her is going into the pantry everytime I open it and not wanting to come out. We put the trash in there to keep it away from her so I go in just to throw something away and she darts in and hides behind the trash. I used to let it go and let her explore but then one time she found her food and decided to rip the bag and scatter the food everywhere! I cleaned the pantry somewhat knowing I better clean it better within a day because of ants - then she got in again and I thought "well the food is all out of her reach no big deal" and she got into the clay litter bag (I switching to clumping) and got it everywhere!!! Glad I hadn't cleaned all the food yet. Then I thought it was safe and she found small bag of food on shelves two up from the floor (and the pantry is only the size of the trash can (not really walk in) and got the bags of food and brought it out with her. Thought that was cute till the next time - I want her out of the pantry! SO. That went on at least 10 times last night. Then darting out the door to the garage - well we don't want her doing this because the garage door is not always closed..... The other well she darts in our two bedrooms that we have the doors closed to if we go in them for a second but we have all our furniture and electronic equipment in there and a lot of stuff for her to get hurt on because we got it out of the way of the tile people coming..... I have learned to just shut the door and leave the light off and come back in about 2-3 minutes and she will be by the door wanting out. Then she is trying to eat the power cords... OK - so after those which aren't sooooo bad then it comes down to bite and scratch everything that moves including legs, feet, hands etc. It is like a little hyper machine that won't stop! We just want a little rest - kind of like a baby crying that won't stop.

I really would love to get her a playmate and see if that helps - might try that if hubby forces me to give her up I can try to bring a cat from a friends house in and see - I wanted to do this already but her cats got ringworm and gave it to me and her and her family and this was 2-1/2 months ago and although gone it is not totally gone from me so I get the feeling it doesn't ever really go away so I'm afraid Meka will get it..... Even though the cats are supposedly free of it.... So that will be a last resort...

Why is she terriorizing us??????? It did seem to start when we pulled most of the furniture up last wednesday (a week ago) for the tile people that got put off till this weekend....

Debbie

[cruisetime]

The only problem with getting two cats is that there is no guarantee...... If there was and she didn't just hate the second cat I'd go for it quick but since there isn't a guarantee hubby would kill me! He really wasn't all for the first one but said ok when I told him the only thing we could loose is the $100 it took for the Animal Control and vet bills and food and litter... He said it would be worth trying for $100. She was next in line to get killed and was so friendly. WELLLLLLLLL... So much for friendly! Now hubby is about to tell me to take her back and that stresses me out even more! He won't work with me to get her better. He had it with her when she attacked him last weekend and wouldn't let go. He had to pick her off him and she had teech and nails dug in! His arm was a mess!!!! I can't really say I blame him. If she had done it to me she probably would have been at ANimal Control Monday morning. Hubby would have insisted as he is real protective of me and knows that I was scared of cats to begin with since a stray kept attacking me. SOOOO.. How can I get a second cat (which he wouldn't allow me to spend money on since no guarantee) and then what??? HELP!!! Plus we travel to an RV once every two weekends or so and she travels ok but a lot of cats don't.... Debbie

[Craftlady]

My advise would be to confine her to a smaller area/room. Have litter, water, food in this area. Give her some toys. Slowly allow her to explore other areas of the house, have her in this smaller area for a couple days then move her to intermediate area with little more space. Eventually, full run of the house.
I'm reading in your descriptions of everything allot of stress coming from yourself and your husband. Cat's will play off of stress.

If it becomes to stressful to be a cat owner it's ok. People wont think bad of you. If you were to decide that animal ownership isn't for you and your husband, please find a loving home. Avoid kill shelter.

[catcrazylady]

I too am picking up on a lot of tension from you. It sounds like things were ok in the beginning when she was kind of lazy but now that she is a healthy, happy, and very bouncy young cat she is becoming a problem. Some cats are just way more active than others and I think she sounds very bored. Do you spend time playing with her? I know we spend lots of time wearing our youngsters out in the evening. We have the laser light and Rosco bounces off of the walls when we have that out but he settles down once his energy has been released. Maybe you should try spending time with string toys and rolling balls with her. Anything to get her moving so she uses up that energy that is getting her in trouble.
You are right that there is no way to know for sure if another cat would help or not. I think the more you confine her and limit her the more bored she is going to become and make things worse when she is loose.
As for her attacking your husband I think that some cats just don't do well playing with people. They get to rough and that really hurts! Try to redirect her energy onto a toy that she can attack. When Magoo was so aggressive we got him a stuffed toy and tied a string to it and let him kick his stuffed chickens butt instead of ours!! That worked for us because he got his aggression out on the toy and we turned it into play time for us. Everybody was happy then!

Just remember that they are like kids and want attention. Bad attention is better than no attention at all. If all else fails....she will outgrow it eventually. Don't stop loving her but if you can't tolerate her then maybe you should think about rehoming her. Please, if it comes to that be selective and please don't take her back to the kill shelter. Once a cat has been adopted and then returned their chances are really narrowed for a second adoption.
Hang in there and remember we are here to listen and help if we can.

[Jods]

By the sounds of this I don't really know if a second cat would be a good idea... Your already having trouble with the first and if it doesn't work out you have 2 cats to find homes for. Honestly your cat is acting like a CAT!! lol sorry to put it this way, it seems to me as if she's enjoying the attention right now being naughty.... If you ignore her it may help. I hope it ends up working out for you every cat is different not all cats are lap cats and maybe she's npt she just acted that way at first cuz she was in a shelter. Good luck anyways and really think before you get another cat.

[kimlovescats]

I agree that your kitty is sensing yours and your hubby's frustrations. She may also be sensing your undlying fear that you said you have had for cats in the past. Given the circumstances, I don't think another cat is your solution. I honestly feel that if this is so stressful for you, then it would be in the cat's best interest to find her another home. PLEASE don't take her to a shelter that euthanizes .... she deserves another chance to do what she loves best ... be a cat!

[dukedogsmom]

I agree that she could be picking up on your anxieties. I have been that way with Doogie, feeling I couldn't relax at all unless he was in the kennel. Yes, he's jumping on things but not as much as when he got here. I've started relaxing and he actually slept in my lap today for 1 1/2 hours! So, I say to give all of you more time.

[cruisetime]

Hubby was what really had me stressed - he was on his last once of control with everything going on in our lives and him telling me to take her back got me really stressed - so anyway we talked last night and he is much calmer. Before we got home he got the idea to take her for a ride in the truck so we did go to the local supermarket with her in the truck - he stayed in the truck with her while I ran in. She was played out when we got home. The biggest part is her biting and scratching. We will be patient. We carried her into the garage and walked around so she could see everything. We will back the car and truck out and let her loose in there another time but I want to carry her each time over the threshold because I do NOT want her to learn it is ok to dart out doors - this has me really worried as we go camping in an RV - and she could so easily get out and get lost...

She is bored - you guys are right - BUT the more we play and we play a lot with her - the more excited she getts and then she starts attacking us - feet and ankles. She doesn't ever seem to get tired or if she does she takes a 5-10 minute cat nap and is attacking us wanting more play...........

We will be patient and she is picking up our stress. Also with the furniture gone and us ripping up carpet last night it will be better when we come home Sunday I hope and can put the furniture back out on new tile.... Then get back to a normal routine which I am sure she misses....

Thank you all for being there for me!!!!!! Debbie

[kimlovescats]

I'm glad things seem better today ... we all have "those days" when things seem bleak at best! Hang in there!

(hugs)
Kim

[catmandu]

Not only was Pouncer wild,but my Brother gave up,on JJJ3,as he was into everything,knocking things over,and for a while,he did that at The Hotel,but now he is a Wonderful Companion.Meka,has to sow her wild oats,maybe an interactive Cat Toy,to exhaust her,a bit.

[cruisetime]

Do I count as an interactive toy???? hahahahaha Meka thinks so!!

I will try to find the laser light great idea! - what exactly is it called and where do I find it??? Thank you! Debbie