Can I kill myself NOW?

[MariaM]

Why was I put in this family?

[sammy101]

dont kill yourself

i dont even know whats wrong,but you dont have to tell me if its too private..

[MariaM]

I won't. I wouldn't do that. But I seem to be thinking about it more and more lately. I don't know whats wrong with me, and I don't know why I was put into this family.

I absolutely hate my mother, and my sister is almost as bad.

[Mil0Luv3r]

Don't kill yourself! Even though sometimes I thing the same... My friend's brother will through nails and videos at her! One time the phone was rining and she picked it up and she said "hello" like 10 times no one answered so she hung the phone up then her brother got mad and through a video at her had! Then she said her head started to bleed! She has cut herself! And then my other friends friend had tried to kill herself but before she died someone found her!

[KYS]

You have a dog named Major who
loves and needs you.
I am sure you are much loved.
Life can be harsh and is full of ups and downs.
But the ups make everything worth while.
Maybe you can talk to someone like a
school counsler.

[sammy101]

I get mad at my parents alot.Liek theyre always asking me "why dont i spend more time with my friends" LIKE EVERYDAY! and im really starting to get peed off.Sometimes i think that im depressed,well sometimes i get minor depression.but not very often,but i get mad and bored very easily,so its hard for me to cope living my parents constantly asking me questions. but i have Kodie,and Bear with me that i can be with,so when im mad i just take Kodie for a long walk.but i still love my parents but they just get on my nerves sometimes.

[MariaM]

I hate them so much. My mom is the worst. I don't even know how to describe it. Even my friends know how bad she is. Except they don't see how horrible I feel...its like at school...whatever, at a friend's house, whatever, as soon as I get home though, my mom start's *****ing at me. Today my friend was over for about 30 minutes after school. When her mom comes to get her, my mom starts complaining and complaining and COMPLAINING about Major. She does it to EVERYONE. I get so mad, I can't stand it, and I don't know how to relieve me bottled up anger.

This is besides the point, but she just said "Why don't we just take him off the cable and see if he comes back?" and I'm crying so hard right now, it hurts. She told me she's going to move the cable so that he only has 5 feet of room. She is not listening to me at all. Everything I say, she tells me this horrible excuse. I can't handle this anymore.

[MariaM]

Omg you don't understand how horrible she is. She is honestly, truely, the worst mother alive. I could honestly go on forever about how I would have been so much better off in my friend's family. Her mom understands her. I'm always told I shouldn't compare, but when I do, I just can't stand it. I don't understand.

[MariaM]

I NEED TO SCREAM! I said to her "would you leave any of your family outside?" and you know what she said! she sais "I would if I could" I feel like she hates me. She said I was just as bad as my brother, and she complains about him all the time.

[sammy101]

is there a couselour or someplace you can go too??Without her knowing...like at your school or something.she sounds like she's really...umm ya.is there a place you can call do you know of???

if my mom was like that i would call someone right away.ecpecially if she's threatening to let Major loose to see if he comes back,which is really horrible

[rizzy]

I am sorry that your mother is like that. That would drive me crazy, especialy about Major. I agree with sammy101 about talking to somebody. My prayers are with you, I hope that everything will get better.

[MariaM]

No, I don't believe there is anywhere I could go. We live in an extremely small town, with nothing, so I came here.

We do have a fence. But he can get out if I don't watch him constantly. I would never in **** let him have free reign in the yard IF I thought there was any chance he could get out. I don't know why she is how she is, or why I was put here. Me, the animal lover, placed in a family with somebody who does NOT understand animals. So was I put here to help her understand? SHE WILL NOT EVEN TRY. I was I put here to MAKE her try? Well, when she YELLS in my face that she's gonna slap me, and scares the **** out of me, I don't know. Threatening that if the dog comes in, she moves out? And I am supposed to handle this, how?

[MariaM]

Ohhh how this offer is looking more tempting each minute. Listen to THIS.

When I first got Major, my mom said Major could come inside the basement. She said I could housetrain him and everything. But when we got him, well, he can't come in for a few days, because he had flees. Once the medication stuff kicks in, he can come. Ok, that makes enough sense. Well...what do you know? I HATE THIS! STUPID PEOPLE. "The vet said he could be an outside dog" "BUT YOU SAID HE COULD COME IN!" "I changed my mind!" "YOU CAN'T CHANGE YOUR MIND! YOU SAID HE COULD COME IN!" "That was before I found out he could be an outside dog!" "SURE, HE CAN SURVIVE OUT THERE, BUT HE IS PART OF THE FAMILY!" "I don't like family in this house as it is! You know he was our trial dog!" And this got me SO ANGRY! I said "MOM! DOGS ARE *NOT* **** TRIALS!" and she goes "APPARENTLY THEY ARE" (bad situation that happened to somebody) "NO THEY AREN'T!" "YOU OBVIOUSLY NEVER GOT MUCH SLEEP LAST NIGHT!" "THIS HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THAT AND YES I DID!"

She.
Is.
IN.
SANE.

[Karen]

Keep a journal, it helps to have someplace to vent. Talk to your dad or some other adult when your mom is not around. Maybe she is struggling with her own depression or others issues that she doesn't realize is making everyone around her so miserable.

Love Major, take him for a walk whenever she gets you angry.

In a moment when she's not in a bad mood, explain to your mom that when you are logged on to Pet Talk, you ARE hanging out with friends, they just happen to live all over the world, that's all.

In just a few years, you'll be an adult, and out on your own. Hang in there!

Have you decided what you want to do after high school?

[MariaM]

Thanks everyone...

I do have a journal. I usually write in it before I go to sleep.

I don't know if my mom is struggling from anything...it sure as heck sounds like it, but I think that just may be her.

I think I want to be a vet. I'm not exactly sure. I want to be an actress or a chef as well, but I can't see that happening. So I'm just thinking about a vet and going with that...it's one of the only places I see myself being happy.