Can't cuddle Luna without having Lily around! :(

**Kirsten** · 09-04-2003, 03:19 PM

Does anyone else have a problem like this?

Lily cannot stand it when Luna has my attention, no matter if I'm cuddling her or brushing her, Lily - even when she has slept before - would notice and comes running between us immediately. I'm not quite sure if she's jealous of me or Luna, but it seems it's more Luna's attention she wants in moments like that, so she obviously wants to show me Luna is hers.

However, Luna often seems to be stressed by this now. Minutes ago I was cuddling Luna while she was resting on her cushion, and when Lily came, she growled at her and pushed her away with her paws. Lily didn't mind and curled up next to Luna's belly.

Hmmm, I wonder if this stressful situation made Luna pee on the sofa yesterday!

I mean, they are really very close and Luna seems to love the baby, she even lets her suckle, but sometimes she would love to have some peace - and some cuddling sessions with her meowmie. She already seems to be more and more detaching from me, but I can almost feel her disappointment.

BTW, I already tried to close the door behind Luna and me to have some time with alone, but Lily always notices and cries on the other side of the door. And then of course Luna isn't relaxed anymore. Poor girl!

Kirsten

**Barbara** · 09-04-2003, 04:11 PM

It's possible that Luna has moments in which she feels bothered by Lily. Try to give her quality time as often as she wants it.
Our boys have developped a totally different time schedule for love. E.g. Filou comes first thing in the morning, says hello, follows me to the bathroom and gives headbumpies. When I go down, Filou stays upstairs and now it's Tigris' time who lies on the newspaper asking to be petted.

Maybe you can flirt with Luna while Lily is sleeping. Anyway in addition to antibiotics much attention will be good for her

(Which does not mean she doesn't love Lily -I am sure F+T love each other too).

**jazzcat** · 09-04-2003, 05:51 PM

I had that problem with Ripley and Jazz when we first got Jazz last year. Whenever I or my husband would try to give Ripley attention or even just brush him, Jazz would run in between us and Ripley. It really stressed and upset Ripley since he had been my only cat baby for over 10 years. He acted so upset all the time that I didn't even notice when he first bacame sick a month later from catching Jazz's URI. It took Ripley over two months to recover and then after that he began to tolerate Jazz more. Plus by that time Jazz had settled in and wasn't such the jealous kitty.

I think it will just take time for Lily to settle in and not be such an attention hog (as my husband called Jazz). In the meantime try to give Luna all the attention you can. Let her know she is still the queen of the house.

**Uabassoon** · 09-04-2003, 06:56 PM

I have this problem with Corkscrew and Tibby, but it's not so much with cuddling but with playing. Tibby hogs me whenever Corkscrew wants to play with me. The first few times I tried putting Tibby in a seperate room so I could play with Corkscrew she would start to cry and Corkscrew would want to check on his sister, so this is what I do now. Find a toy that Lily really likes, one that she can play with on her own. When you put her in an extra room bring out the toy and let her play with it while you are cuddling with Luna, then when you are done make sure you put that toy away so it doesn't lose its specialness. I also give Tibby some catnip or some treats while she is in there.

**Cataholic** · 09-05-2003, 09:22 PM

I have this problem with Tenny and Dakky. They are best friends, but, Dakky is very jealous of the affection I show Tenny. Tenny will run from me if Dakky comes over while I am petting Tenny. It is only with these two males that this exists. I hate it, cause it makes me think I can't love on Tenny.

**Kirsten** · 09-06-2003, 02:30 PM

Hmmm, all I can do at the moment is "stealing" some time with Luna before the kitten would notice.

Today was great because the baby was sleeping in the living room while Luna has detected my bed again as a good place to sleep when the living room door has been closed after the peeing accident.

However, I spent some time with her this afternoon while I was reading, and she was lying next to me on the bed, and I hope she enjoyed it herself, too!

And yes, I HOPE she knows she's still the queen of the house!

Kirsten

**NoahsMommy** · 09-06-2003, 02:42 PM

With six cats, that happens quite a lot here. All we do is make sure we have one-on-one time with each cat every day, even if it means ignoring one of the others during that time. I also greet them every time I walk by, it helps them to know I love them, even if there are other cats.

It does really help that David plays with them as well. I don't think I could personally have this many if it weren't for him.

**Kirsten** · 09-06-2003, 02:49 PM

I don't think I could personally have this many if it weren't for him

Hmmm, I'm beginning to learn that already two cats mean so much more work and responsibility than only one, especially when one of them is a kitten!

BTW, I'm also greeting mine whenever I see them, I believe that makes them realize they're respected as individuals!

Kirsten

**NoahsMommy** · 09-06-2003, 03:13 PM

Originally posted by Kirsten
Hmmm, I'm beginning to learn that already two cats mean so much more work and responsibility than only one, especially when one of them is a kitten!

BTW, I'm also greeting mine whenever I see them, I believe that makes them realize they're respected as individuals!

Kirsten

I like that, respected as individuals. You put that nicely.

Kittens are always much more work. I love them, but its so much work for you physically and then emotionally when you have other cats. It'll get better soon.

**Kirsten** · 09-06-2003, 03:26 PM

Thanks!

Yes, I know it will be better.

And I think it wouldn't be that hard if there weren't so many other things I currently have to deal with, like the job loss and Luna's UTI.

I'm sure Lily will calm down sooner or later!

Kirsten