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Thread: Doggie Pledge

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2003
    Location
    Connecticut
    Posts
    105

    Doggie Pledge

    ~~ another for you all~~


    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    I will not eat the cats' food, before or after they eat it.

    I will not burn rubber through the open car window and into the fast food restaurant, no matter how good it smells.

    The computer's mouse is, unlike a real mouse, inedible.

    I will stop trying to find the few remaining pieces of carpet in the house when I am about to throw up.

    I will not throw up in the car.

    I will scootch my bottom along the grass to rid myself of hangers-on.

    I will not steal used sanitary napkins from the bathroom garbage.

    I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc.

    I will not eat other animals' poop.

    I will not lick my human's face after eating animal poop.

    I will not roll my head around in other animals' poop.

    "Kitty box crunchies" are not food.

    I will not eat any more socks and then re-deposit them in the backyard after processing.

    The diaper pail is not a cookie jar.

    I will not eat the disposable diapers, especially the dirty ones.

    I will not wake Mommy up by sticking my cold, wet nose up her bottom end.

    I will not chew my human's toothbrush and not tell them.

    I will not chew crayons or pens, 'specially not the red ones, or my people will think I am hemorrhaging.

    When in the car, I will not insist on having the window rolled down when it's raining outside.

    I will not drop soggy tennis balls in the underwear of someone who is sitting on the toilet.

    We do not have a doorbell. I will not bark each time I hear one on TV.

    I will not steal my Mom's underwear and dance all over the back yard with it.

    The sofa is not a face towel. Neither are Mom & Dad's laps.

    My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

    I will not bite the officer's hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's license and car registration.

    I will not play tug-o'-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet.

    I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the coffee table.

    I will not roll my toys behind the fridge.

    The garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff.

    I must shake the rainwater out of my fur BEFORE entering the house.
    ~*~*Aurora*~*~
    Very proud mommy
    of a Blue Weimaraner
    ~*~*~*BLU*~*~*~

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    State College, PA
    Posts
    5,911
    That is good--I think my doggies need to read a few of those!!!!
    Emily, Kito, Abbey, Riley, and Jada

  3. #3
    to cute

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