I'm ill and on sick leave

[Kirsten]

Just in case you wondered why I'm barely around lately. I'm feeling ill for weeks, and I wish I could say what I actually have. Felt exhausted and worn out again all summer, but a couple of weeks ago, it has gotten so bad that I felt too ill and too exhausted to work. For the last three weeks, I made it through the Mondays, but the next day I couldn't keep my eyes open and felt too tired and weak to even sit on my chair at work. I had to go home and slept all day. And this exhaustion is not only physically, it's mentally also; sometimes even thinking seems to be too much.

First I thought it was my thyroid condition that made me feel that way (as there have been times in the past when I felt burned out like this before) and I blamed it on the fact that I didn't have any vacation days this year, but a couple of weeks ago I learned that I'm positive for borrelia (which causes lyme disease; I've been bitten by ticks twice earlier this summer). Been told by many that it could be the borrelia infection that makes me feel so ill.

But it's so frustrating. I'm worried about my job situation and my future, and the entire situation makes me feel so useless and worthless, to the point of actually getting depressive. I know that my co-workers are not very understanding, they just don't believe that anyone can be too exhausted to work. However, there are other problems as well, like constant stomach problems and the problems with my bowels, caused by diverticulosis. And lately, I'm often having migraines. Seems like during the last couple of days, my health went downhill very quickly, and the thought that I just cannot rely on my health is scaring me a lot as I don't see any perspectives for the future.

Sorry for venting,
Kirsten

[Pinot's Mom]

Kirsten, I've only been on PT for a year, and I know some of your health problems precede my posting, so forgive me if any of this has been done or visited before.

You need to be analyzed by a diagnostic specialist and could use some couseling for depression as well. Your symptoms are well beyond what most of us can help you with other than getting things out of your system and hopefully saying words that might make you feel slightly better.

A diagnostician needs to put all your ailments together and figure out what's causing them. Your immune system is obviously shot (something I can relate to), but they need to figure out why. There must be a base cause. Depression can also do very real and serious damage to your physical health and cannot be left untreated.

Please know we're all here, we care about what happens to you, are praying for a solution, and will be there for you all along the way if you need us. Please let us know.

Maggie

[lvpets2002]

Oh I am so sorry to read this.. Maybe you need some medical test done.. I sure know that would be so frustating to not know what is wrong.. Hey you need not worry about what others think & just be concered about yourself.. Take it easy girl & rest.. The babies will give you some good nursing.. Keep us posted..

[Asiel]

Sorry about the health issues Kirsten. Guess that lets the horse riding out for now, just when you were starting to enjoy it.
But I agree you need to be diagnosed properly so you can get the help you need. Doesn't sound like ordinary fatigue and I know how debilating that can be.

[Karen]

Lots of the symptoms of Lyme disease are hard to pin down, but it really sounds like that is what is causing your troubles. "Early symptoms may include fever, headache, fatigue, depression ..." sound familiar? Maybe download some information on Lyme diease, and send it to the coworker you trust the most, so they can begin to understand. The good part is you are catching it now, some people go years before getting it correctly diagnosed, and that leads to long-term problems which I'm betting you will be able to now avoid.

You'll be in our prayers, and I am sure the fur nurses will do their best to comfort you.

[moosmom]

Kirsten,

I lit a candle for ya, girl. Have they ruled out Fibromyalgia??? Thoughts and prayers coming from CT for a speedy recovery.

I know in CT, a person is entitled to file for long term disability and, if you don't come back to your job within a certain amount of time, the employer is required by law, to put you into a position COMPARABLE to what you did before you went out on leave.

I'm rooting for you, K.

and hugs,

Donna and fur crew

[Scooter's Mom]

As you know, I'm in the exact same situation... except mine is not for Lyme disease. I'll be off work through December it looks like. Not earning my "keep" is pretty depressing. First and foremost, you need to take care of you. Second you can worry about Luna and Lily. But, you must come fist. Take the time off work to sleep or read or play a video game... find a way to relax. Take some of your beautiful stunning photos.

I'm a horrible advice giver... but please know you are not alone. You can talk to me here or on FB. Anytime! I will reply as soon as I can.

((Hugs)) for you.

[DJFyrewolf36]

Prayers on the way that you can figure out what is going on and get to feeling better! *gentle hugs*

[Medusa]

Have they ruled out Fibromyalgia???

I thought of that, too, although it's almost as difficult to diagnose as Lyme disease is. I've had fibro for 10 years now and the fatigue is sometimes worse than the pain. I power through the day sometimes just on sheer will power. Perhaps mention it to your dr. and see what s/he says. In the meantime, I'll send up a prayer that all will be well for you, Kirsten. Keep the faythe.

[Randi]

Kirsten, I'm so sorry to read this. The worry about your job, I think, adds to the stress. I know how it is to feel lost concerning the future, but try to look at the positive things and say to yourself: I have to do something about this and get better, so I will be here for Luna and Lily! Yes, easier said than done. Do you eat healthy? Do you get enough sleep? Have you talked to your doctor about how you feel?

I wish I was closer, we could go for nice walks in the woods and share stories about our lovely kitties, indulge ourselves with coffee and cakes at a cafe...

Kirsten, know that we're here for you. If you need to talk, you're welcome to ring me. Get better, girl!!

(((hugs)))