I can't pull myself together....

[Donnaj4962]

:::sigh::: I just can't "get it together", and I don't know what to do. I will try to make this as short as possible, as I don't want anyone turned off by the length. I really need some suggestions. First, some of you know that I have been taking effexor for several years. It has helped me tremendously! But at the first of the year, our insurance changed and it now costs me $50.00/ month for just the effexor. I just cannot afford that. My doctor changed me to celexa (on the $4.00 WalMart plan!) but that just didn't help me like the effexor. She now has me on tegretol (mainly prescribed for seizures, but also used for depression) and it is not working either. I just sit and cry. I have been going through a lot in my life since the first of the year. I met a great guy the first of December, and everything was going great... until I had my breast cancer scare, and then he was gone. No explanation, nothing. Won't return my calls, won't answer the phone when I call. I know that it was too soon to tell, but I felt like he could have been the man I have been looking for all my life. I was so scared, because it seemed so right. He said the same thing. We tried to go slow with everything, but we both felt so "whole" when we were together. I miss him so much, and with no closure, I just can't get past it all. Work has been terrible lately. I feel so useless and like I cannot do anything right. I am paranoid abut everything and anything anoyone says. I don't want to do any of the things I used to do. I don't want to be around anyone. I actually had to leave work early today because I was sitting at my desk, tears streaming down my face. I just can't function. I have to force myself to get out of bed each day to go to work, and then I am always at least a few hours late. Thank goodness my boss is okay with that. I know that I need to give the tegretol some time to work (I have only been taking it for 5 days), but this is ridiculous. I feel so alone. No one understands what I am feeling. People who I thought would care just tell me to "talk it out" with them. But I just cry, and nothing gets solved and I don't feel any better. What do I do? The tears just won't stop. **Just so everyone knows, my girls aren't being neglected in any way. I am taking care of them and luvving on them just as if nothing is any different. They just are damp from the tears.**

[joycenalex]

donna, i am sending you hugs and kind thoughts. besides the meds are you doing any kind of talk therapy? and can your doctor either give you effexor samples, get you on a discount program or have her staff use the preexisting need for this med to keep you on it at your old rate?
as for this guy...true colors have shown through. it doesn't make the hurt less, it does show that he was a weak foundation for dreams.
as for work, will your doctor get you on a medical leave till the worst of the blues passes and you're doing better emotionally? more hugs, joyce

[Catty1]

Sweetie - do check about some depression counselling. It's more than talk - you can get a recovery plan happening!

When I finally found a good med that worked for me, I did a fair bit of counselling with homework for a while. It helped me work at the way I thought about and reacted to things in life.

ALSO - you may be having really bad reactions to going off one med and starting another.

Hopefully your insurance will cover something like that. Also, try some of the suggestions about Effexor above. Hmmm...I wonder if the manufacturer would like knowing about that?

Wyeth, the manufacturer of Effexor, has a Patient Program to help those who cannot pay for the med, or whose insurance does not cover it. Check the link below!

http://www.wyeth.com/contact?rid=/wy...nt_assist.html

Qualification Guidelines

To receive medication through the Wyeth Pharmaceutical Assistance Foundation, patients must certify all of the following:

* They are unable to pay for their medication.
* They do not have private insurance or government insurance to pay for the requested Wyeth medication or have depleted all other insurance coverage options (such as Medicare, Medicaid, and other assistance from a government agency).
* They earn less than 200% of the current Department of Human and Health Services (HHS) Poverty Guidelines.
* They do not have other sufficient financial resources or assets to pay for the medication requested or that paying for the medication from their own resources or assets would cause severe hardship.
* They are residents of the United States or Puerto Rico.

Hope this helps - ask your doctor. He or she might know how to jump through a hoop or two here.

[Catty1]

Donna - a sweet pic I found on ICHC:

[IMG][/IMG]

[jackie]

I don't really have a lot to say about it, I haven't dealt with depression before, but I have dealt with a lot of jerky men (it is my forte). This guy isn't worth your time!

I hope that you can sort your meds out and finally start to feel better, it sounds really rough what you are going through. I know I don't know you but if you ever want to chat, pm me.

hugs.

[Daisy and Delilah]

I hope you can get your medication and feel better. I have nothing to offer except to wish you the best and {{{{{HUGS}}}}}.

[critters]

Yes, even the new generic venlafaxine is expensive, which is what I'm betting you were taking, judging by the price. How about doing venlafaxine again, but at a smaller dose? That's what I did. The lower dose isn't great, but it's at least functional.

[JenBKR]

How long have you been off of Effexor? Going off of it is HELL - been there. It did help me a lot, but I had to go off of it to get pregnant. I am on Zoloft now which seems to be helping a lot, but it did take a few weeks. When you went off Effexor, did you taper off or stop immediately?

[moosmom]

Donna,

I was on Effexor for years as well. It stopped working so I had to go off of it. The withdrawal was awful. That's why you have WEAN yourself off of it. Then I was put on Celexa while in the hospital. I was on it for two years and it also stopped working, just recently. He put me on Cymbalta but I'm having problems with it. So now I'm on nothing, at his insistence, until another drug that be found. In the meantime, I'm suffering from vertigo, which is no picnic.

As far as not being able to afford it, here are some links that can help you.

PPA, Partnership for Prescription Assistance has a toll free number you can call. They'll ask you questions and let you know if you qualify. I did back before I was on disability. It's well worth looking into.

http://www.freemedicinerevolution.co...FQo4FQodvkkBew

http://www.astrazeneca-us.com/conten...asp?PPA=CorpID

Please don't say people don't understand. Yes, some people who have never gone through depression think it's as simple "getting over it", and just don't get it. I only wish it was that easy. Unfortunately, depression is a chemical imbalance of the brain. It's very complicated.

Please dial "211" on your phone and someone will ask you what kind of help you're looking for. That's what I did and it's the best thing I EVER did.

Good luck sweetie. Please keep us posted. We care. I'll PM you with my cellphone number. It's free so just call me and I'll call you back so it won't cost anything.

[Freedom]

I also hope you can get into a therapy program, as it does work WITH medication and helps as well. Unfortunately, it all takes TIME to work, and that is the hard part. Blessings.

[Donnaj4962]

Thank you everyone for the suggestions and well wishes. I am feeling a little better today. I actually got up, fixed some breakfast, got dressed and ran some errands. Believe me, THAT in itself is an accomplishment.

As for the effexor, I would LOVE to go back on it, but my doc has no samples,and I truly cannot afford it. I will not qualify for any progrmas since I have prescription coverage through my insurance. My doc was a pharmacist before she became an MD, and she told me that coming off of effexor would be rough. That is why she put me on celexa. Once I finished the effexor script, I was able to start right in with the celexa. It worked, but was just not the same as the effexor. So she thought we should try the tegretol. It seems to be having the opposite effect from what we are trying for.

I talked with a friend last night, and she talked with her Dad for me. He is an MD. He suggested I NOT take the tegretol and keep on the celexa at least throught his weekend and on Monday call my doctor and see what we can do. He thought that maybe I just need a larger does of the celexa.

I am also going to call about counseling on Monday. I have some other health issues that I have been ignoring, and I know that I should not. I have promised myself that I will take care of everything on Monday. I am going to clean house today (haven't done it in over a month! ) and try to keep busy. Thanks again. I just needed to vent about it all last night. I have kept it in for so long.

[Medusa]

:::I met a great guy the first of December, and everything was going great... until I had my breast cancer scare, and then he was gone. No explanation, nothing. Won't return my calls, won't answer the phone when I call. I know that it was too soon to tell, but I felt like he could have been the man I have been looking for all my life. I was so scared, because it seemed so right. He said the same thing. We tried to go slow with everything, but we both felt so "whole" when we were together. I miss him so much, and with no closure, I just can't get past it all.

A "man" (and I use the term loosely) who would turn tail and run at the first sign of illness is not the one for you. We say things in the first blush of romance that we wouldn't ordinarily say. He is NOT a great guy, he is a coward. Someone who won't take phone calls or return them is someone who's going to look around one day and wonder where HIS support system is. And guess what. He won't have one. I'm sorry that this happened to you but better now than later. Rip the bandaid off; it stings for a little while and then it's over. Now you can heal. Leave this guy in your dust and take care of yourself. You've been through enough. I'm praying that you get your meds all straightened out and that you'll realize just how strong you really are.

[ramanth]

I have no advice, but I'm sorry to hear you are going through rough times. I hope they get better soon. *HUGS*

[Pawsitive Thinking]

Again, no advice but lots of PT love and support for you - give yourself time and you will get through this

[lizbud]

I have no advice, but I'm sorry to hear you are going through rough times. I hope they get better soon. *HUGS*

Same here. I don't know much about various RX drugs so I can't help
with that, but your Dr should work with you to ease you over this.I do
hope you feel better soon.