A major peeve.

[RICHARD]

I just was a news report about some women who were "molested" by a Catholic priest.

They were at a news conference with their lawyers celebrating a multi-million dollar judgement in their favor.

Since the law of the land protects people who have been sexually preyed upon, why do they show up at a news event and identify themselves?


I guess money does heal all wounds or was it wounds all heels?

[Edwina's Secretary]

I guess you are suggesting they should be ashamed Hide their faces maybe?

Would you feel the identity of a robbery victim should not be revealed and they too should hide?

Yes, some news agency do not reveal the identity of victims of sexual abuse.

So???????? These people were not "outed" by anything but their own choice.

[lizbud]

I just was a news report about some women who were "molested" by a Catholic priest.

They were at a news conference with their lawyers celebrating a multi-million dollar judgement in their favor.

Since the law of the land protects people who have been sexually preyed upon, why do they show up at a news event and identify themselves?


I guess money does heal all wounds or was it wounds all heels?

Maybe they do it to encourage others to come forward about abuse.The
victim is just that, the victim & they have nothing to hide for.

[critter crazy]

I am not sure I understand what your issue is Richard?? Is it cause they came forward on TV?? Like Lizbud said, it is usually to encourage others to not be afraid to come forward as well!

[RICHARD]

Yes, it is because they showed up on the telly.

I think the fact that they went to court and won is enough bring others forward.

The only thing they were missing was the huge cardboard check you hold up at the end.

[Edwina's Secretary]

I guess RICHARD wants them to wear burquas...hang their head in shame or something.

A victim...who gets retribution against the abuser....should not be acknowledged publically nor should they celebrate....

Geez....

and...btw...why do you put the word molested in quotation marks????

[columbine]

Each victim of sexual abuse has to handle the trauma their own way. It's essential that abused people's identities be protected as a default, so that they won't be so afraid of reprisal (especially in the case of abuse by a respected pillar of the community) that they won't dare prosecute.

When a survivor has the courage to stand up in public and say to people in similar situations, "Hey, look, it was illegal, it's not your fault, you can stand up for yourself and the law agrees with you," it's an act of responsibility and kindness to do that on behalf of those who were so broken by the experience (and by whatever previous experiences rendered them vulnerable to abuse) that they can't yet speak for themselves.

Awful sentence structure, but I was trying to keep it brief!

Love, Columbine

[RICHARD]

and...btw...why do you put the word molested in quotation marks????

Molestation is a pretty broad term.

You probably saw the verdict against Isiah Thomas and the owners of Madison Square Garden. Now, two more women that worked for Madison Square Garden are suing for........S.H.!

They saw 11 million and are going for their share.

I just want to get a picture as to what crimes are worth what dollar amount.
-------------------

No, I don't want women to wear burqas, potato sacks or masks.
It might help Gloria Allred and Nancy Grace.....

I just find it very interesting that a large dollar amount makes a woman want to celebrate a sexual attack that they presented in court and won.


Now that the Catholic diocese in Lost Angeles has gone bankrupt, the San Diego Diocese is asking priests to give up their pay (1,500 a month) to make the settlements they have agreed to pay, how much does that leave for the people who are still suffering the effects of molestation-but have never said anything about it?

I bet if you parked an arse outside a courtroom anywhere a victim won a jail sentence against a molester you wouldn't see news conference with victims and the sharks 'celebrating' the case.

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How exactly does a dollar bill repair your psyche, your pain? Do you rub it over the infected area? Make a tea? Burn it and dance in the smoke like a shaman would make you do?

Chances are the person who molested them wil never spend a day in jail. He's still out on the streets-money makes things seem alot better.

[Catty1]

RICHARD - I don't know why you are focussing on the money.

My best friend's fiance was abused as a child, and it STILL puts a twist in his head 40 years later. It is NEVER over.

The money will never heal what happened to those women. And the Madison Sq deal - it's not the women's fault as to what the lawyers told them they could get. That money won't heal them either.

It's the VINDICATION that is being celebrated - 'My God - someone believed us! We won!'

And they will STILL have to get unlisted numbers because of the crank calls they will get.

With all the sexual scandal that the Catholic and other churches have been touched by (as well as non-church institutions), I think it very short-sighted of the Church to not have a plan B for such challenges.

And those that haven't spoken up? Just plain afraid.

For those victims that won their case, to hide their faces would carry some admittance of shame or guilt.

They are proud and innocent.

And will never be the same again.

[RICHARD]

RICHARD - I don't know why you are focussing on the money.

I focus on the money because I went to a Catholic school for a few years.

You pretty much pay for religion there.

You pay for baptism, confirmation, quincenera (sweet 15) and weddings-you rent the church for the ceremony or mass.

Most churchgoers in Lost Angeles are Mexican and out of that percentage there are still the hard core members of the church that believe that you have to do it the 'church way' or you go to hell.

I have seen and know or people who spent literally thousands of dollars for a baptism, sweet 15 or wedding-The prices for those masses are going up.

------------------------

Catholic/private school, where they teach you a little couth, god and manners
are also charging more, again due to the fact that the lawyers got in there and stuck it to the church.

I happen to like my occasional mass-but when the Save Our School article in the Sunday scorecard says that the price of school lunches, breakfasts and tuition is going up because the area churches are bankrupt, that kinda p!sses me off.

Why? because my faith was hijacked (kinda like an homicide bomber, but by using kids, not bombs) and all the innocent people have to pay for a sin that didn't even involve them..

Nice.

I just hope that I can do a Christmas Eve/New Year's Mass without having to pay admission-I just may have to bring my own holy water too!
Or I can buy the 1.5 liter-taken from the Sea of Galilee brand!

Justice? Nope.

Payoff? You betcha!

Vindication? Hardly.

Let me say this again so no one misunderstands.

Someone molests you or you kid.

You can either put the emmeffer into jail or cash out with a million bucks.

I think I'd rather see the AH in jail with Bubba.

The million bucks wouldn't clear my conscience should it happen to someone after me....

I always thought that the innocent and proud people would walk out the back door of the court and go on with their lives.

I forgot that proud and innocent might very well include a book deal and screenplay?

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LOL, Since we are discussing big money from lawsuits..here's another big bucks move. The Duke lacrosse players.

Little AHs bought some lap dances and trouble. I guess I'd be harsh saying that they deserved their problems..But look at the financial windfall!

Strippers or studying?

Hmmmmmmm......

[Catty1]

To gently emphasize one point - no money or games or brou-ha-ha will change the one important thing.

It's interesting that all most outside observers will focus on is how the victims are apparently focusing on just the money.

The damage done from the assaults will never be repaired.

As a wise person told me - don't judge the insides by the outsides.

And the media tends to report only the superficial - 'they won and got money'.

WOO-hoo.

The damage remains forever.

[lady_zana]

I focus on the money because I went to a Catholic school for a few years.

You pretty much pay for religion there.

You pay for baptism, confirmation, quincenera (sweet 15) and weddings-you rent the church for the ceremony or mass.

Most churchgoers in Lost Angeles are Mexican and out of that percentage there are still the hard core members of the church that believe that you have to do it the 'church way' or you go to hell.

I have seen and know or people who spent literally thousands of dollars for a baptism, sweet 15 or wedding-The prices for those masses are going up.

------------------------

I was raised Catholic....I went to Mass every Sunday until I got married (unless I was ill).....we never had to pay for any of the Masses. Yes, it was a small Church but still, we were baptised, Confirmed, and married in the Church without paying any sort of fee. (When I married, we gave a donation to the priest but that was because we WANTED too...he was a wonderful man and we picked the amount given.)

Are there Catholic churches out there that make you pay for the Masses? Probably...but there are many, many which don't. It doesn't seem like it should be so hard to find a Church that doesn't force payment.

[lady_zana]

and all the innocent people have to pay for a sin that didn't even involve them..

Sexual abuse involves everyone....when sexual abuse in a community occurs, everyone suffers.....from emotional pain to physical pain to paying for the aftermath out of their pockets.

It's sad that it has to hit people in their pocketbooks before they'll say "something needs to be done" but if that's what it takes so be it. Maybe they join an organization to end sexual abuse now.

If the only people that were "involved in the sin" had to deal with what occurred, the abuse cycle would never end. The victims would never come forward, still thinking they were the only ones it had happened to, and the molestors would continue to make more victims.

[columbine]

It's sad that it has to hit people in their pocketbooks before they'll say "something needs to be done" but if that's what it takes so be it. Maybe they join an organization to end sexual abuse now.

Yeah, that's not a characteristic of the Catholic church, it's a characteristic of our culture, where individual court decisions take the place of a broader shared ethic.

If the only people that were "involved in the sin" had to deal with what occurred, the abuse cycle would never end. The victims would never come forward, still thinking they were the only ones it had happened to, and the molestors would continue to make more victims.

Also, the perps in this particular case are part of a network whose job is to protect them, move them around geographically, and above all else keep it quiet - so the brouhaha, while bitter medicine, is particularly salubrious.

[Edwina's Secretary]

You pay for baptism, confirmation, quincenera (sweet 15) and weddings-you rent the church for the ceremony or mass.


I have seen and know or people who spent literally thousands of dollars for a baptism, sweet 15 or wedding-The prices for those masses are going up.


Why? because my faith was hijacked (kinda like an homicide bomber, but by using kids, not bombs) and all the innocent people have to pay for a sin that didn't even involve them..

Justice? Nope.

Payoff? You betcha!

Vindication? Hardly.

Let me say this again so no one misunderstands.

Someone molests you or you kid.

You can either put the emmeffer into jail or cash out with a million bucks.

I think I'd rather see the AH in jail with Bubba.

The million bucks wouldn't clear my conscience should it happen to someone after me....

I always thought that the innocent and proud people would walk out the back door of the court and go on with their lives.

I forgot that proud and innocent might very well include a book deal and screenplay?

In a nut shell....BS...

People who spend thousands of dollars on baptisms, quincenera (and I just attended one) first communion, etc....spend it on the party, the clothes, the music etc....NOT on the church. Of course, attending church usually involves a contribution. The church needs lights, mortgage payment, cleaning, etc. You do not rent the church however, for these ceremony.

If what you have written is truely what you believe, and not an attempt to spark controversy, you need to read a little more about the situation. The coverup made putting the "emneffer" in jail impossible -- statute of limitations. The issue here includes the coverup. Priests were moved around and allowed to continue to have contact with children. The "institution" was as culpable as the individuals.

So to your way of thinking....if Phil Spector is found guilty...the mother of the woman who was killed should just walk out the back door of the court and quietly go away?