Application form....
I got this in an email last night and I thought it was real cute. Enjoy!
CAT'S APPICATION FORM for POTENTIAL ADOPTERS
Your Name:
Name of Spouse:
Address of home I will be assuming:
Square footage of home:
Total Sq. Ft. of human sleeping quarters (referred hereinafter as 'Servants Quarters') (Not to exceed 5% of home sq. footage):
My sleeping quarters will be (circle one):
- On a cat bed.
- On your bed. (referred hereinafter as 'my' bed)
- On the floor.
- On the furniture.
- On the stairs.
- In the garage.
- Anywhere I want.
No. of human children in my home:
No. of children who might pull my tail:
Previous cat experience (circle all that apply):
- I have recently owned one or more cats.
- I was recently owned by one or more cats.
- Fed a cat.
- Been slept on by a cat.
- Cleaned a litter box.
- Bathed a cat.
- Been scratched by a cat.
- Picked cat fur off my clothes.
- Picked cat fur out of my eyes.
- Accidentally ran over a cat.
- Allergic to cats.
- Chased cats out of yard.
- Cleaned up cat puke.
- Stepped in a hairball.
Any Canines in residence? (circle one):
- No
- No
Have you ever had a cat run away from this address in the last three years?
If yes, please explain yourself:
Your Expected salary (circle one):
- $200 weekly
- $100 weekly
- Nothing, just the satisfaction of knowing you took me in.
- You pay me for living with you.
Location of litter box (circle one or all that apply):
Laundry Room
Living Room
Garage
Bathroom
Dining Room
Pantry
Nook
Kitchen
None (outside)
Cat will have outside privileges? (circle one):
- Yes
- Yes
Cat will be de-clawed? (circle one):
- No
- No
Servant names (List all dwellers of home, including yours):
Breakfast will be served not later than (circle one):
6am
6am
6am
6am
6am
6am
Dinner will be served (circle one-careful, there is only one right answer):
- 5pm
- 6pm
- 7pm
- Upon demand.
- Eat what's left over from breakfast.
Menu (circle all that apply):
- Friskies
- Whiskas
- 9-Lives
- Meat Loaf
- BBQ Chicken
- Filet Mignon
- Tournados with Bearnaise
- Roti De Porc Poele
- Filet of Fish Poached in Wine Sauce
- Shoulder of Lamb
- Veal
- Sauteed Prawns
- Salmon Pate
Desserts (circle all that apply):
- Pounce
- Twinkies
- Donuts
- Ice Cream
- Spongecake
- Strawberries in Bavarian Cream
- Caramel Almond Custard
- Chocolate Mousse
- Vanilla Sauce Souffle
- Upside Down Apple Tart
- Crepes with Orange Butter
- Three Butter Cream cake
List three references that I might contact (No dogs, please):
Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, champagne in one hand and strawberries in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming WOO HOO - What a Ride!
--unknown
Sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can't see
--Polar Express
Until one has loved an animal, part of their soul remains unawakened.
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