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Thread: Dog and Cat Diaries

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    midwest
    Posts
    491

    Dog and Cat Diaries

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    I thought this was really funny!:

    As seen in a dog's diary:
    >> 7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!
    >> 8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
    >> 9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
    >> Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!
    >> 2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!
    >> 3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!
    >> 4 pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!
    >> 6 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Mom! My favorite!
    >> 7 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Dad! My favorite!
    >> 8 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!
    >> 9 pm - Oh boy! Tummy rubs on the couch! My favorite!
    >> 11 pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in my people's bed! My favorite!
    >>
    >> As seen in a cat's diary:
    >>
    >> Day 183 of my captivity... My captors continued to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from clawing the furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant. Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded - must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair - must try this on their bed. Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear in their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan...

    There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More important, I overheard that my confinement was due to my powers of inducing "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

    I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured. But I can wait, it is only a matter of time...

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2003
    Location
    Syracuse, NY
    Posts
    759
    Janelle, that is hysterical! One of my favorites. I've seen it before a long time ago and still love it. Every time I read it I laugh out loud!! Thanks for posting it!!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Kentucky
    Posts
    875
    That is so cute. I'd read a shorter version of that before; I just love it!
    Proud meowmy of Weezie, Eepie, Grey Girl and Neko...or Weezer Peezer, Eepie Peepie, Grey Grey and Neko the Gecko as they are commonly known!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Posts
    39,454
    Michaels Diary,would be a little more positive,I hop.March 30th.Got up,this morning,and guess what,the mystery Kitten,is not here any more.And I am jumping,on Our Bed,with Moose,and Roscoe.I wonder,where that Kitten,went to,she was a pretty nice Kitten,I guess.Although,we hada scratch up.Her scent,is still pretty strong,in here! And theres where Our Toys went,as Dad,wanted her,to have something,to do.And a litter box,all to herself,and her oown,dishes of food.Whjat was she anyway,a Royal Cat.Hopefully,she has a New Home,like the Siamese,that was here before,and stayed in the Bathroom. Yummy,Kittren Food,I havent had,that in years!
    THE RAINBOW BRIDGE FOUND HOTEL ANGELS HAVE A NEW FRIEND IN CORINNA.


    ALMOND ROCCA BATON AND ELLIE ANGELS ARE GUARDIANS TO ETERNAL KITTENS ROCC-EL AND T TEEN ANGEL, ALMOND ROCA , VLAD , PAWLEE , SPRITE. LITTLE HEX, OSIRIS AND ANNIE ANGELS.
    EBONY BEAU TUBSTER AND PEACHES BW SPIKE & SMOKEY


    NOW PRECIOUS AND SAM ARE TOGETHER WITH ETERNAL KITTENS SAMMY ,PRESLEY, SYLVESTER AND SCRATCHY JR , MIGHTY MARINA, COSMIC CARMEN, SAMSON ,UNDER KITTY AND SUNKIST AUTUMN & PUMPKIN.
    MIA AND ORANGE BLOSSOM ANGELS HAVE ADOPTED TUXIE , TROOPER , SONGBIRD AND LITTLE BITTY KITTIES MIA-MI BLOSSOMER, TUXEDO AND DASH AS THIER ETERNAL KITTENS.
    PRINCESS JOSEPH AND MICHAEL ARE CELEBRATING 19 YEARS AS LUCKY FOUND CATS

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