Dearest Bibbles, you are so very adorable and precious! What a beautiful little Campbell's Dwarf Hamster you are. You are such a cute little thing with that soft-looking pretty-colored fur and the lovely big dark eyes. And you are so tiny, not much bigger than your dear person's finger! You have the most delightful personality, too, and you make your dear person smile with all your antics and energy. We're so glad she adopted you. Now you are no longer bullied but living the terrific life you deserved right from the start! You and she love each other very much, don't you. What a wonderful love-filled home you share!
Congratulations, darling Bibbles, on being chosen today's Pet of the Day! We hope you and your dear person and all your family and friends are enjoying a fine celebration, full of fun and lovies and all your favorite games and treats.
I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
CATS, he said eventually. CATS ARE NICE.
-- Sir Terry Pratchett (1948—2015), Sourcery