Yes, I am ranting again.
I feel like you guys probably think I am psychotic or something.
I have been agonizing over academic decisions lately. Mostly, changing my major. I have been SO utterly obsessed (AND depressed) with this for the past 3 weeks. I was going to change to Radiology, but realized..nah not for me. Then I was thinking Graphic Design and while I do not hate it, my heart and head (as corny as that sounds) always leads me back to Biology and animals.
I feel like I am letting this dictate my whole life because of one stupid math class that I am scared of. I am scared off so easily when it comes to a bad grade. I am scared off easily by what I read online. I am scared off by what my brother keeps telling me. He is looking out for me, I know that, but he keeps pushing me towards some technical school or something that I know I am gonna regret. Yeah, maybe nursing and medical fields have better job prospects but what does that do for me if I HATE my job?? I seriously can't imagine doing anything else with my life other then working with animals. The medical field is NOT for me. I want too get a degree in Biology - just biology. Not wildlife biology or ecology, just so I am not screwed and limited with just that. Online I read things I didn't like...but ya know, I think I need to stop reading into this so much. My dad told me he supports me and I think that is enough for me.
I am just sick of letting people control my life. I am sick of my siblings telling me things like "oh you're gonna regret this...", "you're gonna be paying $40,000 to go clean up animal crap in a zoo somewhere, have fun with that..."...like why do I let them bring me down? I am not saying I want to be a zoo keeper, geez. I think there's alot I could do with a bio degree...especially if I further that degree with a Masters (in a more specialized field). I have read that jobs are hard to come by, but lately I've been reading that is the same within every field....gahh
Sorry for the rant...I am just so sick of hearing this crap from my own family. It seems they think they know everything. My mom seems indifferent to the whole thing. Don't get me wrong, I am worried about student loans but I have to try to make it work.
Anyway, sorry for the random post - also, any advice for me? I think I need to apply for lots of scholarships and internships to get experience. I think I may try a few different "fields" before I choose exactly what it is I want..
Oh wanted to share some good news to - I will officially be working for a wildlife refuge over the summer as a part-time unpaid intern, only two days a week...maybe thats a start. Plus my current job (working with dogs), plus previous experience with volunteering at the SPCA, plus FFA awards and the like...I don't think I am set up for failure, hell maybe I am, but I think for once I need to do something for myself.