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Thread: [Dear You. . .]

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  1. #1
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    11,191
    Dear whoever,

    Has anyone else felt so lost before? I am sitting here, at home, because I decided to save money and go to Community College. I see my best friends living on their own and having great experiences...and I feel like I'm just sitting here accomplishing absolutely nothing. Everyone tells me I have such a great future and such great potential, yet why can't I ever see that? I sit here and just worry about my next move, my next college, my career, what EXACTLY I want, where I am going to live and just everything I SHOULDN'T be worrying about. I feel like such a loser. Living at home at 19, not graduating CC in two years like a normal person, and not knowing where I want to go. My mom keeps tellin' me to go to the local private school and live at home to save money, but I don't want that. I regret not going away to school.

    I've narrowed down my career path - I want a future in Wildlife/Biology/Agriculture/Farming, but WHAT exactly? I don't know. I feel like I'm wasting my money to get a piece of paper that won't matter because I won't get a job. I would kill to work for the Fish and Wildlife Service or the DOA but it's so difficult.

    I'm just throwing a pity party for no reason. This is what happens when you have so much spare time to think.


  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    Cincinnati, Ohio USA
    Posts
    11,467
    {{{{{hugs}}}}} Alysser. There are so many sayings appropriate for your situation right now, and along them, "can't see the forest through the trees", "the grass is always greener" and "one day at a time" come to my mind first. There is NOTHING glamorous about living on your own at 19. Nothing at all. Heck, I lived with my mom, at 29, for three years, while I completed law school. I can't say that I spent two seconds regretting that decision. I was a full 10 years older than you! You do what you have to do to get where you want to be. It isn't in a second. It isn't in a week, and it isn't in two years. Slow down. You have the rest of your life to pay the bills. Trust me, it really isn't all that it is cracked up to be!

    I would encourage you to think about what you want to do, and what you can do in that field. I don't encourage you to find some obscure major, or some highly competitive field to focus on, or the rest of your life you will spend trying to be gainfully employed. It is great to say that you should 'follow your passion'. Right up until the word 'reality' comes into play. I would rather pay my bills than follow my dreams, from a practical standpoint. Don't forget, you are 19. Things happen, life changes, even goals change. What you know you want at 19 just might not be what you want at 25 or 30. Lots more living ahead of you than behind you.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2000
    Location
    Los Angeles, CA USA
    Posts
    12,031
    Quote Originally Posted by Cataholic View Post
    {{{{{hugs}}}}} Alysser. There are so many sayings appropriate for your situation right now, and along them, "can't see the forest through the trees", "the grass is always greener" and "one day at a time" come to my mind first. There is NOTHING glamorous about living on your own at 19. Nothing at all. Heck, I lived with my mom, at 29, for three years, while I completed law school. I can't say that I spent two seconds regretting that decision. I was a full 10 years older than you! You do what you have to do to get where you want to be. It isn't in a second. It isn't in a week, and it isn't in two years. Slow down. You have the rest of your life to pay the bills. Trust me, it really isn't all that it is cracked up to be!

    I would encourage you to think about what you want to do, and what you can do in that field. I don't encourage you to find some obscure major, or some highly competitive field to focus on, or the rest of your life you will spend trying to be gainfully employed. It is great to say that you should 'follow your passion'. Right up until the word 'reality' comes into play. I would rather pay my bills than follow my dreams, from a practical standpoint. Don't forget, you are 19. Things happen, life changes, even goals change. What you know you want at 19 just might not be what you want at 25 or 30. Lots more living ahead of you than behind you.
    Alysser, Cataholic has shared some wonderful advice with you from her own experiences. Be sure to save this and refer back to it as it is very wise. Slow down, you are going to be just fine. Don't be so hard on yourself, it will all fall into place nicely as the years go by.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Dec 2010
    Posts
    6,498
    Blog Entries
    2
    I agree with everyone, cut yourself a little slack Life can be a little scary sometimes but accepting some help from your family who loves you is not a bad thing at all You sound intelligent and ambitous and I am sure whatever you choose to do, you will be wonderful at it! Have a little faith, oh ya, and eat your vegetables

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Michigan
    Posts
    11,191
    I don't know where my state of mind was when I wrote that last night. I was a bit of a wreck. I'm sure listening to sad songs and things of that nature didn't help me whatsoever! I was still feeling it a little this morning but I have to say I do have extremely good friends. They assured me I wasn't a loser. I'm actually a little embarrassed by my post. I just really was throwing one big pity party but I truly felt worthless.

    I'm not worried about getting a job in my chosen field, I'm more worried about just the job market in general. I was just flipping out, I just really hope this market improves. I'm not *SET* on one field, I'm more set on the whole National Park System or DOA in general (and there's still a whole private sector plus state and county park jobs). I'm sure it is difficult, but I am doing as much as I possibly can to gain experience now. Recently, sent in an app to volunteer with the Fish and Wildlife Service, had FFA in high school and I will probably have a bunch of internships and pretty decent grades. My degree is probably going to be as general as you can get around here, so no worries there! I was thinking about maybe getting an internship so I could move out for a few months and experience it. My mom likes that idea a lot better.

    Thank you guys for the support I'm glad I have a support system here to. I really really hope my life does fall into place...wherever their supposed to!

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    Markham, Canada
    Posts
    203
    Dear you:
    I will always love you but right now I really don't like you. You are becoming a bad tempered, bitter old man and notwithstanding your mental health issues I have neither the emotional or physical strength to deal with you at the moment. From now on I have no opinion about anything so there'll be no need to shout and bang or curse under your breath if you disagree. Do what you want - I'm not interested. If and when you are civil, l'll be happy to talk with you.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Illinois, USA
    Posts
    28,394
    Dear Knee:

    Could you please, please stop hurting. It has been over a week since I went to the doctor. I'm following her instructions but you are still hurting. You are limiting my ability to prepare for Christmas! I'm seeing a different doctor on Thursday and hopefully he will get you to quiet down. I have to make it through Christmas Eve and day and I can't do that if you keep bothering me! Knock it off already.


    Dear K.:
    I know changes are coming in your family even though you have not said anything. It is time to man up. You have been an overgrown teenager long enough. Get this taken care of while you have the time.
    Praying for peace in the Middle East, Ukraine, and around the world.

    I've been Boo'd ... right off the stage!

    Aaahh, I have been defrosted! Thank you, Bonny and Asiel!
    Brrrr, I've been Frosted! Thank you, Asiel and Pomtzu!


    "That's the power of kittens (and puppies too, of course): They can reduce us to quivering masses of Jell-O in about two seconds flat and make us like it. Good thing they don't have opposable thumbs or they'd surely have taken over the world by now." -- Paul Lukas

    "We consume our tomorrows fretting about our yesterdays." -- Persius, first century Roman poet

    Cassie's Catster page: http://www.catster.com/cats/448678

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