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Thread: Hubby makes me mad( good update first op )

  1. #1

    Hubby makes me mad( good update first op )

    Hubby doesn't want me to have Runner AND the bunny. hubby keeps saying he's going to take her to the pound(the bunny). I keep telling him.. NO you're not. I'm keeping her. !!!

    He says.. but you promised you would get rid of her when you got the dog.

    I said... no.. YOU said I could have BOTH.

    He said.. I didn't say that. I said.. yes you did.

    I told him. I love her, and I want to keep her. AND the dog.

    Does he have any right to make me give up my animals? If I'M the one taking care of them. I mean... sure.. I don't bring the money home. But I take care of our daughter and the house and MY animals. Yes MY animals. He is not an animal person as you can tell. grrr

    So I WILL be getting her fixed soon. But I think I will sneak the money out of our bank so he won't see the bill on our statement

    Shop around for the cheapest stuff. I already know that american pet diner has GREAT hay 10 pounds for cheap that lasts a LONG time and STAYs fresh. I need to find my tractor supply for litter. I've been using carefresh or yesturdays news. And move her to a different location of the house. Maybe my craft room or something. I'm always in there.

    Right now she's in the kitchen. But I think he's getting annoyed with her in there.

    I'm trying the best I can to keep her.

    What do YOU do when your spouse does this? Tries to make you give up your loved pet?

    So you see. I'm becoming stronger. Standing up to him. Not letting him control me anymore.

    ---------------------------update
    We just talked after him reading my letter.
    he's letting me keep her because I explained how cheap it is to have her, and I have to move her out of the kitchen. Because he wants to get a dining room set.

    He's letting me get the tat too, because I explained that they are small and next to my other one. He thought I was going to get something drastic.

    He only doesnt want me wearing camis in public functions.

    So we are better for now. We have counseling tomorrow
    Last edited by ashleycat; 10-10-2006 at 07:01 PM.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2004
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    Ohio
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    22,419
    What do YOU do when your spouse does this? Tries to make you give up your loved pet?
    I would get rid of husband, sorry, that's just my opinion.

    Forever in my heart...Lacey,Sassy,Mandy,Corey,Ginger,Casey

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
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    Cincinnati, Ohio USA
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    ONLY, ONLY, ONLY cause you posted it in the form of a question: ANYone that "tells" me what I have to do is not someone worthy of my love, respect, commitment, etc. I know someon will say, "Oh, that is cause you aren't married...compromise, submission, blah, blah"....but, no WAY does someone "tell" me what I, an adult, does or doesn't do.

    I would take the husband to the pound. To think you are actually concerned that he would take her to the pound, while he knows you care for her, is rather sick, IMO.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Charlotte, Michigan
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    4,778
    Well, what's good for the "bunny" is good for the "honey"

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Williamsburg,Ontario
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    I think that it has to do with ignorance! My friends husband did this god almost 10 years ago,She had a beautiful Cocker Spaniel(8 at the time)They had a terrible Marriage,Anyways she gave the dog to her sister(he insisted)He was just mad i think because the dog got more attention then he did,Well off goes Blondie,She lived only a month and a half after that.Ya know what he did he went out and got an Old English Sheep dog,There beautiful dogs,But......She had to get rid of her blondie For him to go get a dog that he has always wanted was it fair?No Blondie passed away and i truly believe that an older dog should not be rehomed any dog in that case,Runner is a beautiful girl i think it is time you get rid of him!That is like saying ok i don't want my kid anymore,He has a choice,simple like it or leave,My husband would never do that to me and if he did after all the years we have been together,He would be on the first train,bus outta here!Good Luck to you!


    Maggy(Border Collie)Lacy(Australian Shepherd)Molly(Nefoundland Stormy(Border Collie)RB Anna(Siberian Husky)


    Rest Well My RB angels,Bandit and Anna

  6. #6
    Join Date
    May 2005
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    I am glad that you are standing up for yourself. Does he often try to control you? In what ways? Does it seem like he might have control issues?

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by chocolatepuppy
    I would get rid of husband, sorry, that's just my opinion.

    Haha I think thats excacly what I would do.

    Your bunny is beautiful and Runner is such an awsome breed with neat colours.


    Good on ya for talking back, dont let him touch those pets ya never know!

  8. #8
    Quote Originally Posted by JenBKR
    I am glad that you are standing up for yourself. Does he often try to control you? In what ways? Does it seem like he might have control issues?
    He tries to tell me what I can and can't do.But I'm also in counseling and learning boundries and becoming stronger and my own person.

    He doesn't raise his voice or anything violent. I'm just very submissive. It's what I learned growing up. Watching my mom put up with it from my step dad 14 years till she left. He was an alcoholic.

    SO,, what do you do when in marriage.. Comprimise. He wants the bunny gone. What I do? Keep her, but find better ways to manage. INstead of moving her to the other room, she needs to be out in open for more socialization. So I'm moving the dining table back to the other room, and putting her stuff in place.

    I can't tell him what he can and can't spend money on, so why should he tell me? Just because I don't bring home the bread, doesn't mean I'm not working either. !~


  9. #9
    Join Date
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    Ban stupid people NOT dogs!!!
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    I would get rid of the husband, too.
    Krista : Buster : Coonhound : Rudy : Airedale Terrier x : Dixie : Schnauzer/Terrier X : Miagi : Tabby : Tiger : Tabby/Bengal X : Angel : Russian Blue X

    Rocky, Jenny, & Ginger.. forever loved & always in my heart..

    I have been frosted!

  10. #10
    Join Date
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    My first question is WHY does he want the bunny gone? Does she poo on the floor? Does she bite? Does she have a cage you can put her in?? If not, it sounds to me like a control thing. Definitely have her spayed. That gives him one less thing to bitch about.

    How long have you been married?? Marriage is a 50/50 proposition. Just be careful. Relationships like the one you have described often turn violent. And I don't mean just violence towards the animals.

    ((((HUGS)))))

    Rest In Peace Casey (Bubba Dude) Your paw print will remain on my heart forever. 12/02
    Mollie Rose, you were there for me through good times and in bad, from the beginning.Your passing will leave a hole in my heart.We will be together "One Fine Day". 1994-2009
    MooShoo,you left me too soon.I wasn't ready.Know that you were my soulmate and have left me broken hearted.I loved you like no other. 1999 - 2010See you again "ONE FINE DAY"
    Maya Linn, my heart is broken. The day your beautiful blue eyes went blind was the worst day of my life.I only wish I could've done something.I'll miss your "premium" purr and our little "conversations". 1997-2013 See you again "ONE FINE DAY"

    DO NOT BUY WHILE SHELTER ANIMALS DIE!!

  11. #11
    Join Date
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    Didn't you two discuss "pets" before you got married?? I would NEVER have accepted a hubby who doesn't like pets and has NO respect for mine

  12. #12
    Join Date
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    Quote Originally Posted by moosmom
    Relationships like the one you have described often turn violent. And I don't mean just violence towards the animals.

    ((((HUGS)))))
    That's along the same lines I was thinking - I'm not saying that he will necessarily get violent with you, but relationships with one partner controlling the other does often lead to domestic violence. Please, if you ever need to talk, PM me. ((((hugs))))

  13. #13
    Quote Originally Posted by Maya & Inka's mommy
    Didn't you two discuss "pets" before you got married?? I would NEVER have accepted a hubby who doesn't like pets and has NO respect for mine
    nope we didn't. I came with a cat lol. So.. lol

  14. #14
    Quote Originally Posted by moosmom
    My first question is WHY does he want the bunny gone? Does she poo on the floor? Does she bite? Does she have a cage you can put her in?? If not, it sounds to me like a control thing. Definitely have her spayed. That gives him one less thing to bitch about.

    How long have you been married?? Marriage is a 50/50 proposition. Just be careful. Relationships like the one you have described often turn violent. And I don't mean just violence towards the animals.

    ((((HUGS)))))
    It's more of a money thing. Which I've told him I bargain shop for her. So she doesn't cost that much. He kinda flips out when I spend a bunch at petco. But he didn't see that not much of it was for the bunny. I spent for all of them. And not very often do I spend lots on them. It was more of a one total than small totals lol.

    He is going to counseling with me too. We have the money to have my pets. He is into investing, saving and paying off credit. He's wrapped up into it. It's his hobby, tho he says it's not lol. My pets and my crafts are my hobby.

    Hes got other hobbies too that take a lil $.

    But all I can say is we're workin on it.

  15. #15
    Join Date
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    i had the same problem with my EX!!!!! husband! he was controlling and told me I could only have 1 cat no dogs no hamsters no nothing!!!!!! when my sister had to rehome Jupiter for a little while it was a HUGE battle just for me to convince him to let Jupiter stay with us..

    Jupiter ended up staying for good and he realized having two cats wasn't so bad! Even bringing in the homeless kitties untill the no-kill shelter i like to work with could find them another foster home was a big fight with him all the time. People need to realize no one is going to fall down and die if there is more than one pet in the house!!!

    Husbands are too much trouble!!!!!! they stink!!!!!!!

    If by some crazy miracle i decided to get married agian... i would make sure they understood my strong feelings for animals and my need to have pets and rescue homeless ones!!!!!
    [CENTER]

    Alden is here!!
    7/6/2006 - 9 pounds 9 ounces 22 inches


    Tinky

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