Stupid Kitchen Mistakes?

I saw this on another forum and thought it was a great topic, especially since I am a cook. Luckly, most of my worst mistakes are hidden in the garbage before the crew comes in to eat but last trip, I made one that really cracked me up and I did it myself...

I lost my dishrag. Could not find it anywhere and I spent about 15 minutes looking for it, including digging through the garbage can 3 or 4 times, back and forth to the sink, moved just about everything in the galley and could not find it. No one had come in and I had been in there all alone so no one was playing a joke on me. Finally, I gave up on that one and got a clean one and went on about my business.. Went to put the mayo in the fridge (cough! cough!)..... there it was, in the fridge.

(I had put the dishrag in there and not the mayo!)

Anyone esle have any good kitchen stories? (goofs only)

I don't cook -- in fact, my cooking is so bad that I am told by hubby and the kids to stay OUT of the kitchen! :eek:

Mom though is a cook. She works in a cafeteria and makes the desserts as well as running the register. Years ago, she also made soups and salads and one fine day, she looked down and noticed the diamnond from her engagement ring was gone. She KNOWS it was there earlier in the day. She never did find it, and she's sure somebody got a special in the Chcken Noodle soup. :eek:

:D Diamond Soup anyone?

How do you get by with not cooking? My sister is like that though. She said if she ever wins a lotto, she is building a house with NO kitchen....

I havent cooked in about 20 years, not real cooking I microwave or oven bake..lol..but no telling what youll find in the fridge or cabinets or drawers..im always putting things up in the wrong place..lol. :)

My idea of a perfect kitchen is vending machines!!!

One time I was putting groceries away and ended up putting lettuce in the freezer. I wasn't paying attention, I guess.

When the mayor and I were much younger, we had to cook breakfast for ourselves one day. We are both pretty good cooks, have been for a long time, and we decided we wanted bacon and eggs.

Mistake #1 was leaving the kitchen unattended with a plate of bacon on the table. Freckles, our ST Bernard, decided it was going to be her breakfast, and that was the end of that.

Mistake #2 was cooking the sausage that we replaced the bacon with. We cooked it in the microwave, and kept trying to get it crispy. In the end we wound up with about 8 oz. of tasty hockey pucks.

:o Haha well I made a Delissio pizza once, and forgot to take the cardboard off of the bottom. Actually, that was my first time making one, and I don't think I even realized the cardboard was there. Well, I couldn't let the pizza go to waste. It was cooked all the way...but it wasn't very crispy. I don't think my brother thought it was bad, so I decided not to mention it.

We had Thanksgiving one year at my Aunt's house (this was probably 5 years ago...) We brought the fruit salad but we made a lot since there were going to be a ton of people so we put it in our turkey roaster pan. Well somebody saw the pan out of the oven and put it in :eek: We had cooked fruit salad and no turkey :eek: Never again did we bring the fruit salad in a turkey pan, lol.

This is a great thread!

I love to cook, but don't get into it that often since I started working. I do miss it.

My worst story is the night I tried to make pizza dough from scratch. I had icky sticky dough up and down my arms, stuck to my jeans, down the counters, down the cabinets, on the floor. Yuk yuk yuk. No matter how I tried, I couldn't get it to firm up. I lost my temper at it :o and threw it in the trash. We went out to eat that night. :p (And I still don't enjoy making pizza dough)

I was thinking about this thread, and I remembered another... when hubby and I were first dating, the girls wanted to bake cookies. I at that point did not want to showcase my complete lack of kitchen skills, so I figured how hard would it be to make cookies!

Heather was 10 at the time and wanted to make choclate chip. Ashley was 12 and we were adding food dye to sugar cookies to make red sugar cookies. Well, she figured she'd make green choclate chip cookies, and green they became. And she thought if she added red, then they'd be red and green swirled (I guess that was her line of thought) well they turned out a hideous olive color. Those were the saddest looking cookies known to mankind. I think hubby and his mom were the only ones brave enough to taste test them. LOL

To this day she blames me for not telling her green cookies would not be appetising, and everyone blames her for making the saddest looking cookies! :D and thus, they figured out my little secret: I can't cook!

LOL! Green cookies? I see nothing wrong with that! I have often wanted to dye my rolls green on St Patty's Day but never have been brave enough to do it.

The color of food has nothing to do with the flavor... I'd have not paid attention to the color at all..

Probably the dumbest thing I've done in the kitchen is cooking the giblets and the neck in the turkey. :rolleyes: Imagine my surprise when I carved the turkey and saw that little bag in there. :D

I have this great recipe for chocolate mousse. You make it in a blender and as the ingredients are blending you are supposed to shove them down the sides with a spatula.

BUT.............I dropped the spatula by accident and it lifted the ingredients and in a perfect circle I had chocolate mousse all over the curtains - the counter - me - on the wall - and back on the other side of the curtains.

I was finding chocolate mousse for years.....................and I still crack up when I remember that day!

Gini,

That's what you get for trying to fit a Moose in a blender!

That reminds me of the definition of a "blivet" - it is someone trying to get um...........ten pounds of um..................into a five pound bag.

How about adding salt instead of sugar in my applecake, and then serve it to my guests :eek: :rolleyes:
well, I did, and they did NOT like it... :o

As well as the breakfast hockey pucks which Lady's Human mentioned, there's the gingerbread story.

When we were kids, my beloved Grandma lived with us for a while after Grandpa died. Well, you know the "too many cooks" thing? Grandma and I liked to cook together, and made gingerbread many times. Then came *that* time. We were out of brown sugar, so made some with molasses and white sugar - not completely successfully, but that wasn't the big problem. We were both doing things too quickly, and as we poured the batter in the pan, I looked at Grandma and said "Did you put the baking powder in?"
"No, she said, "I thought you did!"
"Oh, I said, "I thought YOU did!"
So we measured the baking powder and tried to stir it into the batter already in the pan. Do NOT try this at home, boys and girls! It was awful. It looked like an amateur diorama of some ancient landscape, high in some places, low and gummy in others. We literally didn't gingerbread again for years!

The worst food I ever made, was when I added garlic to a can of brown beans :( It smelled good, but the taste was so bad I nearly dropped my bowl. Tom took a few bites & then tossed it out. Rob ate the whole bowl :rolleyes: Guess who was sick that night & for 2 more days?

Oh Laura..... hubby needed my help last night in the kitchen. He was making those AuGratin potatoes from a box. All he needed me to do was open the packet of cheese powder and pour it into the warmed milk & butter mixture that he was stirring. Ok... sounds easy, right? NOT FOR ME! I tore the pouch open, and powdered cheese went ALLLL over the stove, the wall, the refridgerator, the floor, me, and hubby! :eek: I couldn't believe all that powder was in that little packet!!! :eek: :eek:

I told him it was HIS fault for making me COOK... he said "you weren't cooking, you were only tearing open a packet of powdered cheese!"

LOLOLOLOL

Quote:

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Originally Posted by catnapper

Oh Laura..... hubby needed my help last night in the kitchen. He was making those AuGratin potatoes from a box. All he needed me to do was open the packet of cheese powder and pour it into the warmed milk & butter mixture that he was stirring. Ok... sounds easy, right? NOT FOR ME! I tore the pouch open, and powdered cheese went ALLLL over the stove, the wall, the refridgerator, the floor, me, and hubby! :eek: I couldn't believe all that powder was in that little packet!!! :eek: :eek:

I told him it was HIS fault for making me COOK... he said "you weren't cooking, you were only tearing open a packet of powdered cheese!"

LOLOLOLOL

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hehehehehe too funny :)

I think my worst mistake is when I decided to boil some eggs.

I put them on to boil, and proceeded to go out and mow the lawn :rolleyes: Needless to say I had eggs on the ceiling and everwhere else in the kitchen :eek: It's just a good thing I didn't burn down the house:o

http://www.petoftheday.com/talk/showthread.php?t=22165&highlight=kitchen

:D

I have to say when i made banana bread for the first time.
I blended it TOO much and then i had to gas stove too high and it was stiff and burnt on the outside and goopy, doughy in side!
It was gross!
i think everytime i bake i tend to burn stuff from being on PT too much!