Someone let slip that they create bedtime stories for their fur babies, too, so ...
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Someone let slip that they create bedtime stories for their fur babies, too, so ...
Here is one of Livvy's favorite bedtime stories! (Hint: One of her nicknames is My Darling Furry Princess.)
Once upon a time, a long time ago, maybe it was last week, there was a princess that always dressed in fur, was light on her tiny little tootsie feet, and loved to hunt small game. Like tiny game. Like micies. She was the Furry Princess . Everybody in the kingdom loves the Furry Princess . She's a wonderful girl (who thinks sitting in meetings is a massive bore -- she wants to be off twinkling on her tiny feet or huntin micies!!!) Well, everybody loves her (except the micies). Those micies banded together and paid a Wicked Wowser bunches of cheese to curse the Furry Princess!!!! :eek: :eek: (Eek! Eek!!)
So the Wicked Wowser cursed the Furry Princess and what do you know? She turned into a Precious Puddy Tat!!! When she woke up she stretched and said, "Hmm, something's different! Ooh, ooh! My fur coat's nicer than ever! My teeny tiny tootsies are tinier than ever! And my hunting skills are even better than ever!!! And I have a MAGNIFICENT bushy tail, too!!! I'm a Puddy Tat!!! Hurrah!!! This is my lucky day!!!"
Now she goes hunting micies whenever she wants to -- just trips off on her tiny tootsies and she's on a hunting trip! No packing and waiting for the royal hunting party to assemble. When they do succeed in trapping her to sit in on boring meetings, she curls up in a ball and delicately covers her nose and eyes with her lovely tail and drifts off to sleep. (The rest of the royal family are VERY JEALOUS of that lovely tail.)
So everybody lives happily ever after except the micies -- which is a pretty good average. Happy Puddy Tat dreams to you and may your happy dreams come true!!!
Amberlee, I loved your bedtime story! My 4 boy cats are SO jealous. They don't get bed time stories but I do read to them from their favorite, The Cat Who series of books by Lilian Jackson Braun. They admire Koko, naturally. :D
AmberLee -- As I lack your creative and nimble mind -- I bought stocking stuffer books last year that were "Bedtime Stories for Cats" and "Bedtime Stories for Dogs" (Edwina has many canine relatives!) Of course, Edwina has her own copy.
My point is...you may not have to keep your day job...there's a market out there!
Once upon a not-so-long ago time, a precious loppy bunster was happily hopping through the magical parsley patch, minding her own beez-wax when suddenly a vile socked foot appeared. "Ezcuze me, nobudy iz 2 wearz sockz in da magical parsley patch. Puh-leaze removez dem immEdatly," said the loppy hoppy. The vile socked foot refused. *ThUmP* "I SED TAKEZ OFF DAT UGLY SOCKZ OR PREPAREZ YERSELF FOR DA WRATH OF SOPHIE!! My nicknamez Bonecrusher ya knowz!" She then added a *ThUmP* for extra emphasis. But alas, the bunz threat fell on deaf ankles. "OK SMELLY TOOTSIEZ--I'LL GIVEZ YOU 2 THREE BUT DEN---BEWAREZ OF DA BUNNIE!! One......eight.....five....nine....THREEEEEE!" And the boisterous bun went bounding through the leafy greens, aiming for a quick *nIp* on the ankles. Upon seeing this, the socked foot turned and fled.
But Momz, I wantz a bloody storiez...
No. You're too young for gruesome tales.
I iz notz! And whenz I wuz wittle, I grewz some tailz! Seez?!
Not that kind of tale, Sophmeister.
I WANTZ A BLOODY STORRIE!!!
*sigh* Fine. But not too bloody. *AHM*....Upon seeing the charging bunny...
you forgotz sumpin'
What?
2 tellz em how bee-U-T-ful I iz.
Upon seeing the WONDERFULLY CHARMING & GRACEFUL--not to mention GORGEOUS-bunster
Dat's much betterz
...the socked foot turned to run. However the speed of the bunnikin was too much for the foot. She first teased him...tickled him at his neked spots, with her lush fur. She ran circles around the heathen and finally sank her ivory teeth into his flesh which sent him flying out of the magical parsley patch."
You forgotz da bloodz.
He bled a little bit and soiled his sock. The end.
I wantz more bloodz.
UGH! Fine. The bun ripped the socked foot off at the ankle and ran with it. She ran as fast as her bunny legs could carry her...finally she came upon a village, sold the extremity to the gypsies who inturn sold it to the pork eaters. The pork eaters had it in soup that night. The bun went back to the magical parsley patch--and lived a very happy, socked feet-free life! THE END. NO MORE--GO TO BED!"
Kin I have some parsley?
NO! It's bed time! Go to bed!!
*ThUmP* NUTZ! *ThUmP*
I just hope sweet sophie doesn't have nightmares after all that blood in the story! :eek: :rolleyes:
Great job!
OMG Such creative folks on this board!!! I love it, I love it!! I was just rollin' from laughter at those stories!! Now, I'll have think of one....gimmee a day or so! LOL LOL:p
Once upon a time there was a precious Good Cassy who had a really short attention span, Good Cassy. He liked to explore on top of things like Mount Bookcase and Kitchen Mesa or inside things like Cave Knitting Caddy or the Undercover Cat Cave. Good Cassy would even explore Lake Bathtub from the edges or atop the Belly Island (when it was there), but not inside except in drought times. A cat has his standards, you understand. Good Cassy likes playing mini-blind solos *throm*, *throm*, *throm*, *throm*. Strange sideways rain happens sometimes but Good Cassy has learned to retreat under the bed till the odd storm passes. Feather dusters need to be disciplined with claw and fang and Good Cassy has dedicated his waking hours to keeping an eye on the birdies, the catnip mice, and feather dusters from raising too much hecter around his turf. Oooh, oooh, turf. Cat grass is munchy and Good Cassy will clutch a container to his chest and nibble it. Yum, yum, yum. Good Cassy needs frequent naps to keep up with his busy schedule. Night-night, Good Cassy!! See you in the morning.
Geez! You guys are too funny!:p :p
All of you are so talented!!! Maybe you all should start publishing these stories! They are THE BEST!
AmberLee What happened to the Furry Princess's Prince Oliver? He should bring her gifts of catnip and they could run off into the sunset hunting micies together.... They make such a beautiful pair I love reading their " Love Letters"... Seriously, Edwina's Secretary is right there IS a market out there!:D
zippy-kat SOPHIE aka: Bonecrusher that was a great story too! I say it was worthy of at least a little parsley before bed... very creative bunny you are.:D
On Xmas Eve I read Twas The Night Before Christmas from my ancient Little Golden Book to my furkids, and it is a game to see who can sit still for the duration . . . it is tradition.
Speaking of nursery rhymes, I am on a quest! If anyone knows the words or can locate this children's poem for me I shall be eternally grateful!:D :D It is called "Quack! Said Jerusha" written by Mildred Plew Merryman in the 1930's. Quite a lengthy poem about the experiences of a duckling upon breaking out of her shell. It was a favorite of mine as a little girl and I remember my Mother reading it to me many times over. I've had no luck finding anything on the internet. I have a feeling it was within a book of other nursery rhymes by various authors, which makes my search even more difficult . . . :(
I *vaguely* remember hearing it...I will search for it!!!
You are all so creative, my furkids are really jealous now. I also believe that you should join efforts and write a book!
Mz Sophie, you're such a character! If your mum ever wants to send you on a holiday you are more than welcome over here, I think you and Prema would get on wonderfully! I also know someone who grows parsley...:D
LOL - these stories are soooo funny!!!:D :D More like Furry Tales than Fairy Tales eh?!!!!!
Avajoy - I've spent all afternoon (well it's cold and raining here!!)
on the net searching for Mildred Plew Merryman - found a couple of her poems but nothing even like 'Quack said Jerusha' - sorry:(
Trouble is I'm everso curious now and would love to read it!! In
fact there is an appeal out on one site for someone looking for it!
How about an appeal on Other - General? Get everyone interested and searching!!
Lynne
Now I'm curious about this Quack! Said Jerusha poem!! I haven't heard of it before!!
Still trying to think up some stories for my boys!! I'm just not that creative! LOL LOL Zippy, Scooter would LOVE for you to come up with one for him:D :D hehehehehehe
Amberlee, Marius can always use a story too....LOL LOL;)
Will do...lemme think of one for 'my' boy! ;)Quote:
Originally posted by wolflady
Zippy, Scooter would LOVE for you to come up with one for him:D :D hehehehehehe
Still haven't found Quacky Jerusha...
In my online searching I believe I came across the same appeal you did, and noticed that no one has responded to it . . . :( Thanks for your input and suggestion . . . I'm off to plead for help on General . . . I almost want to offer a reward for it . . . well, if I ever get to read it again, I will see that you get a copy! I won't spoil it by telling the ending of Jerusha's adventure, but it is darling! :)Quote:
Originally posted by lynnestankard
Avajoy - I've spent all afternoon (well it's cold and raining here!!)
on the net searching for Mildred Plew Merryman - found a couple of her poems but nothing even like 'Quack said Jerusha' - sorry:(
Trouble is I'm everso curious now and would love to read it!! In
fact there is an appeal out on one site for someone looking for it!
How about an appeal on Other - General? Get everyone interested and searching!!
Lynne
Zipppy, thanks, too, for your interest and helping . . . maybe you can come up with something . . . :) :)
We dont tell bed time stories, but we DO tell "Bath Time Stories"...you know, when mommy is in the bath and they are staring at me...
This is Noah's:
One day, a long, long, long time ago, there was a man named Noah. God told Noah to build an arc to hold two of each animal in the world. Noah did what God told him, despite what his friends said. (They said he was "crazy", Noah doesn't like that part...) When the arc was built and the animals were loaded (this is where we go off and talk about ALL the animals...) it began to rain and rain. So much rain had fallen that the arc lifted off the ground and began to float. Under all the water was the world...(Noah is amazed at this part) Finally, 40 days later the rain stopped annd the arc was able to rest on land. ALl the animals were able to repopulate the world (shhh....Noah doesn't know what that means...) and life went on. We always end the story with "Now Noah, you have a mighty name to live up to...remember that when you are picking on Noel..." (He ignores that part!)
And for Noel:
Once upon a time, there was a princess kitty, named Noel. She was named that because the king and queen loved Christmas and thought that she was as beautiful as the holiday. Princess Noel loved to frolic in the flower gardens and lay in the sun. She would lay there, dreaming about her prince charming, the black and white royal Prince Rupert. Prince Rupert lived in the next kingdom over, they only got to see eachother when the kings and queens got together. One day, as princess Noel was basking in the flower garden, she heard prince Rupert calling her name. There he was! Running around her family's garden in the sun. She ran to greet him and gave him head butts and rubbies, thinking they were alone....but alas, Noel's father had seen the display and hurried to get his wife, the queen. That night, they sent a letter to prince Rupert's family....they wanted to propose a marriage between the two!! Prince Rupert's family agreed happily and they all lived happily ever after. (Noel likes the story until we tell her that Rupert is a cat, not daddy in disquise...)
LOL LOL Kelly, how cute!!! I love 'em both!! Noah sure does have a LOT to live up too!! :eek:
Noel is just too cute! Such a lady!!:)
Oh, so cute. So sorry I missed the outing in San Francisco. I was awfully sick! Marius' Mom tells me she had a great time with you. Can you imagine telling these stories face-to-face? (Or the weird looks we'd get from people overhearing us??? :o ;) :rolleyes: :eek: )
I'm working on "Furry Prince Cassy and the Adventures of the Pet Talk Round Table". Hope to have it posted soon.
Once upon a time ...
a not so long time ago, Prince Cassy called an emergency meeting of the Pet Talk Round Table. A little human kitten was lost and trapped and the humans were looking in the wrong spot for him. The many Pet Talk Knights and Ladies were very concerned. :eek: "I thought it was a regular kitten, not a human kitten. How can we help a human kitten? They're very heavy," worried Scooter. "And they grab tails," added Oliver. :mad: "My Marius can figure out how to help him," cooed Edwina. Prince Cassy called the group to order. They sat in and around the one of the old fig trees at Fig Tree Ranch. Spencer's fur ruffled as he watched Butter and Ernie slink towards the barn. He'd bet those two were up to mischief.
"The human search party is below the park. The kitten is small for a human and is trapped at the edge of the stream. The water's rising. Some of us will need to hold the head above water and some will need to lure the search party in closer much faster." Kitty and Casper volunteered to lure the search party and the others agreed to take turns at the stream. It would be difficult work, but by taking turns they should be able to carry it off.
Spencer and Ms. Vicky started holding the kitten's collar up and Livvy and Oliver used their body heat to keep the kitten from freezing. Cassy and Ernie worked desperately to loosen the sneaker that was trapped by the stick in the stream. No one panicked, but desperation was beginning to set in as they rotated positions: Tatty Boggles, Mimi, Mr. B, Peaches, Big Mac, Alexander, Shiloh, Edwina, Napoleon, Maddie, Jazzie, Lily, Tundra, Misty, Smokey, Boots, Zezu, Scarlet, Ritz, Tinky, Kitling, Sparky, Freckles, Prema, Maya, Foxy, Simba, Butter, Ernie, Wynki, Took, Snow Tiger, Jumper, Princess, Stump and Emmett, Scooter and Clyde, Trevor and Andy, Pesto, Kylie, Garbo, Ernie, Misty and Fawn, Tebaldi, Winston Winkle Whitewall, Elvis, Jack Daniels, Scooter, Kedi and Wylie, KitKit and even A.J. took a rotation. Finally they saw an exhausted pair -- Kitty and Casper dash up. "The humans are right behind us", they panted, "Should we all hide?"
"Right you are, the Pet Talk Round Table should be kept a secret. Most of you head up the hill and hide", Cassy meowed exhaustedly. Livvy and Oliver, and Marius and Edwina somehow managed to find hiding places together that overlooked the vital portion of the stream.
"Mommy, Daddy", cried the toddler, "I got stuck, but the kitties kept me safe. They held me." The parents were crying in relief and thought little of the strange belief their baby held. But the rest of the rescue team did wonder at the number of paw prints in the mud.
Another successful rescue by the Knights and Ladies of the PTRT. "Does everyone remember your cover story?" Tired mews stated, "I'm under the bed". "I'm in the closet". "I'm stuck in a cabinet". "Napping in the bookcase!" "Oh, no, I'm supposed to be in the basement, but they'll never believe that!"
*****
Do you know where your cat was today?
WHERE HAVE I BEEN??? I can't believe I missed this! Ut oh, better get those wheels spinning! What WONDERFUL STORIES!!! I'm going to take them to bed with me! You guys are THE BEST!!!!
Thank you for the cute kitty story! I loved it even though I don't have a cat. Must say you put lots into this with remembering all the kitty - cats name's.:D
YOU, AmberLee- SHOULD have a Publisher and a Book Deal!! You are so Talented!!!:D Louie and his Meezer Beans loved the story,...even my Husband thought it was great!:D
WOW, what a story! Prema, Maya and Foxy will be honoured!:)
Quote:
Originally posted by AmberLee
Do you know where your cat was today?
I do now! ;)
Thanx for the story! I'm amazed how well behaved Casper and Kitty were!! ;) :D
Amberlee - WOW! Aboslutely delightful! You are so talented.
Too cute Amberlee! I hope you are feeling better! I'll be up there again, so maybe next time! :)
What a great story. So that's what Pet Talk kitties do in their spare time.;)
LOL LOL AmberLee!! Such a great story!! No wonder our cats are always so lazy in the evenings. Must be all the action they see during the day! LOL LOL LOVED IT! LOVED IT!:D I always love your creative posts...such inspiration!!;)
Marius thinks that he and Edwina, Oliver and Livvy need to go on a double date....=^..^=
:D
Quote:
Originally posted by AmberLee
Once upon a time ...
Do you know where your cat was today?
hmmmm, no wonder Ritz is so sleepy in the afternoon!
Hmmm, I'm going to have to think about this as a story idea. ;) :cool: :D
Or should it be :eek: ?
Kitty here, see my reply on that other topic, I guess it was A Perfect Cat Toy or something, in games... Mommy is sooooo boring!!! :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:
These are great stories everyone. Poor Misty never had a bed time furry story. I might just have to read her these. Haha!!
Once upon a time ...
a long, long, looooong time ago the king of the lemmings leapt up from his fluffy little bed clutching his furry chest with one paw and clamping his glittery crown to his head with the other. "My darling," said his wife, the Queenypoo of the lemmings, "What ever is the matter? You're trembling and panting. Did you have a royal nightmare?"
"We must RUN! Run, run, run! I had the most awful vision. Cats, cats everywhere! Gleaming fangs, hundreds of slashy claws, and leapy, twisty, contortionistic gleaming bodies! It was hideous! You can't imagine. Run and save yourselves!"
"It was just a dream, darling, don't give yourself a heart attack."
"No, we must save ourselves NOW. Run, run, run."
:eek: :eek:
And so the whole tribe of lemmings ran and ran and ran and instead of the danger of the massed might of the Cats of the Pet Talk Round Table, they ran right off a cliff. Oopsie! Oh, my! Darned shame. The moral of this story might be that it pays to listen to the queenypoo on occasion. Maybe not.
Sweet dreams, little fur-babies. Mommy loves you dearly.
Bravo! Bravo!
AmberLee, Your so good! You need a publisher!:D :D
LOL LOL AmberLee....you're so creative! I love it!;)
I'm going to read THIS bedtime story to my husband tonight!
The astronaut/guided missile stands poised and clear-eyed high atop the bookcase ...
"Houston, mission is a go. Ten, Nine, Eight. Abort! Abort! Abort! Missile is examining a bug."
Thwack, thwack.
Back to launching pad; slashy tail; adjust rump for take-off...
"Houston, mission is a go. Ten, Nine, ... Abort! Abort! Abort! Mission being scrubbed on ear and neck."
Our intrepid astronaut/guided missile takes a brief, refreshing cat nap following the urgent bath.
"Houston, tail is slashy, repeat: tail is slashy; rump is adjusted. Mission is a go. Ten, Nine, Eight, Seven, Six, Five, Four, Three, Two, One, Blastoff!"
"Whuuuuuufffff!" **Wheeze** "Rotten cat..."
"Houston. Perfect four point landing on Mommy tummy. On trajectory for kibble. All systems are go, go, go. Stand down. Successful mission. Well done, team!"
Once upon a time,
just yesterday in fact, an EVIL genie came to our house to subject a brave pud tat to water torture!!! :eek: :eek:
The evil genie picked up the brave pud tat and dropped him in the water dish. Splishy! Splashy! Splooshy! Crests of water poured across the bathroom floor drenching everything in it's path. Over and over again the brave pud tat got dropped in the water til the water dish was empty and the extra water in the reservoir was empty and there was no more Splashy! sound when the brave pud tat got dropped. So the evil genie got bored and went home and the brave pud tat took his poor, wet, tired body to the middle of Mommy's pillow to sooth his frazzled nerves.
At least that's the story I was told when I got home to a damp cat, soggy pillow, drenched bathroom, and a sputtering water fountain.
Bad, naughty genie!!!