I'm sad....

This sucks *pardon my language*

Im sad, I'm trying to get a permanent job with the State *Im just a temp now* and I really am working hard at it and all I wish for is some encuragement but my dad is being all jerky about it because I'm not going to school full time anymore. *I can't aford it, plus the state pays for some if you work for them* He thinks Im a failure and keeps reminding me about it. Im trying hard not to be a failure and make something of myself but since it isnt the something dad wants for me I guess then Im a loser :( He told me just today to not bother taking any classes if my job asks me to because I'll just flunk out and get fired. He also thinks I should be living "better" but Im happy with the way things are. Ive got a good apartment, A good car and soon a good running truck. I dont make bad money even as a temp but it will never be good enough. I feel like Im stuck in Alanis Morrisettes song "Perfect". Sorry for the rant...

JUST SAY NO TO NEGATIVISM!!!


Chin up! You said it yourself!!!!!! Say NO to negativism!!!!!!

I'm sorry. I know it hurts when your own parents are dragging you down or do not have confidence in you. Makes me very mad for you.

But in the end what matters is your opinion of yourself. Don't listen to your father, you are what you believe you are and you can do anything you set your mind to. Choose the path that's right for you, that which makes you happy.

I'm really sorry that you have to go through that, but hey.. YOU CAN DO IT! There's a chance that you can prove them wrong.. don't give up.. go at it! :)

Thanx for the encouragement guys :) It helps a whole lot

Don't let him get you down! The fact that you even want to take classes is great! One class, or a full courseload - so long as you're out there and doing it! It doesn't matter if it takes you ten years to do it!

You yourself said that your happy with how your life is right now, so why doubt yourself simply because your not doing what your dad wants? My grandmom was the same way - I was never thin enough, fashionable enough, never dated the right guy, etc. then when I went against what she thought I should do? Boy, heck broke loose. I didn't talk to her for years after that. Now I'm married and have a husband who's completely great and supporting me through a MAJOR life change - I'm starting my own business. Its been my life's dream to work for myself and with his encouragement, I'm actually doing it! We're not making ends meet the way we used to, but we knew that would happen.

I'm telling you this because you need to see that there are two sides to the coin: people who force you to do something you're not and people who encourage you to do something you are. You'll meet both types in life. The easy part is enjoying being with someone who has all the faith in you, the hard part is ignoring the one who poisons you.

All that matters in this world is that you remain true to yourself and that you do what makes you happy.

Won't he be surprised when you do well in life - as I know you will. You are smarter than he is. Don't doubt that for a minute. And if he was honest, he'd admit he has his own regrets from when he was your age, and is feeling those instead of wondering what YOU want.

I know bug repellent won't work on him, but doncha wish you could silence his annoying buzzing with one quick slap of the fly-swatter? ;)

Don't let all that negativity get you down. Like Karen said, let it motivate you. A job with the state would be great and probably very secure! I've got a job with the county and there are great benefits and retirement. Good luck and hope you get a permanent job with the state soon.

Thread resurection aaaaah!!!

Anyhow


Karen, thank you thank you for making me laugh this morning...that fly swater comment almost made me spit out my soda all over the computer!!!!!

I'm sorry your dad isn't being supportive...that's really unkind of him. :(

You will succeed....you will make yourself happy. Do what YOU want to do, ignore everyone else...

Hang in there. This sounds like what my husband went through with his father. In his case, his father told him he wasn't smart enough. But my husband stuck with it, and went to classes at night for a long time. It took years to pay off the student loans.

Guess what? It's worth it. If you stick with it and ultimately you'll do more for yourself than get a college degree. You'll find that overcoming the obstacles and achieving goals has its own rewards and benefits.

And don't forget...

Living well is the best revenge.

GOOD LUCK!

Just Say NO to Negativism! :D

CHIN UP AND HANG IN THERE. THINK OF IT AS A CHALLANGE. AND JUST SAY NO TO NEGATIVISM! :D I KNOW YOU CAN DO IT :D :) :D :)

I just can't imagine a parent telling their child that they are a failure:(

I just know that you'll prove him wrong:)

Glad I made you laugh, and glad you managed NOT to spit your soda at your computer! ;) We should find you a t-shirt with a big picture of a flyswatter on it for your to wear when you're visiting your dad - just let him wonder!!!!! ;) "Nothin', Dad, it's an "in" joke, you wouldn't get it ...."

I can really relate to the song "Perfect" which you referred to. My folks are very judgemental and not very supportive. Things HAVE got easier over the past couple of years, but I have just sort of accepted that they will never agree 100% with the choices I have made, or the way I live my life, and I just avoid subjects on which we disagree (which honestly doesn't leave much to talk about :p ). Anyway to be positive about it, I think it has made me a better parent, as I am so determined not to make the same mistakes!

All of my life, nothing I did was good enough for my Dad. I took a lot of verbal abuse (that's really what it is). I married young to get away from home. Bad move that just proved him right.

Today I own my own home, have a really good paying job that I enjoy (most of the time) and am very happy. Dad died 6 years ago, alone. He had run off all three of his kids.

Unless your dad is a real jerk, you might be able to discuss with him why he's treating you this way. Otherwise, just put your chin up and do what YOU know will make you happy.

Mary

The flyswater shirt is a good idea!

Thank you again you all for your support. Thats why I love PT, everyone is encuraging and uplifting!!!

Thank you guys!