Do you have weird family members?

Here's yesterday's conversation with my mother.

CM (crazy mum): Do you want to come around tomorrow, and see the alpacas mating?

Me (scared daughter): NO.

CPNTHMM (crazy pretends not to hear me mum): Are you sure? Don't you want to know about the birds and the bees?

Me (concerned about lack of mother/daughter boundaries in relationship): No, I'm in my 30s, I know that stuff.

CM (certifiable mother): But it's really interesting. The female sits while the male is doing his business.

Me (I need to end this call, really): I don't need to see it now that you've told me what happens. If I'm ever interested, I'll watch a doco on TV.

ISHM (I'm still here mother): He'd better do his business tomorrow, because he's costing me $500 for this.

Me (there goes the inheritance): Are you serious???

EMHANT (erratic mother has a new thought): Can you come around and take photos?

Me (no): NO! Get dad to do it, doesn't he have a digital camera?

CWAM (critical wife and mother): Yes, but he doesn't take nice photos. You can just take pictures of the male alpaca, not when he's with the female.

Me (no means no): NO! Get dad to take lots of pictures, and I'm sure some of them will be nice. I really have to go now, bye.

Me - runs home to lock doors, close curtains and disconnect phone.

Never a dull moment :D

I'm laughing so hard :D

I'm not going to add any comment,Family site oblige :o

Weird family member? Naaww, you should listen the conversations my mother and I have on Sunday mornings when she phone me to be sure we don't forget to go for lunch. :rolleyes: Kids talking, really :eek:

all my family members are crazy! lol ;)

Yep! Specially on my mom's side of the family. Sorry mom:o

Really they can do some very weird things,but I'm not going to into detail right now lol. Sometimes I pretend like I don't even know them.:p

lol!

You haven't seen weird until you've seen my mom and aunt together :o They convinced my cousin's wifes mother that they went door to door dressed in a chicken outfit selling this Orange spray. The lady said she wanted to buy 3 bottles from them ;D lmao. Maybe you had to be there. I won't even go into the other stuff. It's pretty crazy.

Lol, wasn't your mom the one that had the toilet in her front yard? I swear she's related to my mom. I can tell wierd stories forever about my mother. She kills me.

The most recent one was her calling me and forcing me to hear all the details about how Viagra has changed her life. I thought I was going to puke.

HAAA HAAA! And I thought my mom's conversation was weird today!

ha ha! Your mom sounds like a hoot!!! :) If anything, at least you'll be entertained. ;)

I do have wierd family members too, but wierd in that they are estranged, not quirky wierd.

:D Hahaha!

And I thought that my mom was weird! :eek: :D

LOL. That's funny. ;)

Weird what is weird? better yet what is normal?

YES!!! The conversations my mom and I have and the names we call each other would kill some people. Ha ha ha. But hey, I can't complain, some people would die to be as close to their mom as I am. :D I love my mommy.

My grandma is bi-polar, let's not go there, that's a whole 'nother story....:rolleyes: :D :p :o :o Supposidly, according to grandma, my mom was abducted by aliens when she was a kid, and when grandma goes places aliens are following her in the sky. Ha, ha ha, ooooooook grandma! :rolleyes: And this is when she is ON her meds, let alone OFF her meds...OY!

And, um, count me out for the alpaca mating! :p I'd pass it up too.

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Originally posted by YellowLabLover
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And, um, count me out for the alpaca mating! :p I'd pass it up too.

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Why? Won't you get extra credits at school or something? :D You can come and use the toilet while you're there ...

http://www.imagestation.com/picture/...5/f9e44f98.jpg


Tonya, your mother scares me!

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Originally posted by Miss Meow


Tonya, your mother scares me!

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Oh, believe me, she scares me too! I was just telling my husband that the most recent thing was the most traumatic thing that has ever happened to me.

Oh, and I forgot the funny part...After all the horrible details, she calls back and leaves me a voicemail saying "Oh, and if you talk to Gary, please don't tell him what I told you..."

Yeah, like I'm going to run in to mom's husband and say "So, I hear the viagra is working great for you..."

I called her back and said "There's no way in heck that I'll ever repeat that story again, trust me." She made me swear up and down that I wouldn't. lol.

Nicole, your mother sounds like a very interesting person. I bet you never have a dull moment with her! You too Tonya!

I don't even want to talk about my mother! She is just the opposite of fun.

Willie

Thats too funny Nicole :D

I'm with Corinna, just what IS considered "normal" weirdness :confused: must be. These stories are hysterical and make me feel like I'm - guess what - among friends :cool:

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Originally posted by Corinna
Weird what is weird? better yet what is normal?

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I so agree with you Corinna:D

Ah my, isn't life grand?

Alpacas mating and viagra - all on the same thread.

I like the part about the female just sitting there. I am so glad that I know that now. I can bring that up as a topic of conversation at the next party.:D :D

I had to check this post out to see if Amy or Christy posted anything about me. Weird, not me but paranoid, maybe!

My mom and I can get into some real arguments. But sometimes I just think she says things to upset me (not so much anymore but when I was younger....... like the time at Christy's first Communion party and she and I were sitting visiting with the priest (who was also my boss) and she said "so why did you get that second set of holes in your ears? Don't you think that you are a little old to be doing such childish things?"

She also didn't like it when I joined the Catholic church and used to say all kinds of things about Catholics and priests to get my dander up.

Now she doesn't hear well and some of our conversations are interesting trying to get her to understand what we are saying. Like when she was in the hospital and the nurse asked her if she was still queasy and she said she had been for years. And I said no mom she asked if you were still queasy and she looked at me like I was an idiot and said you know I've always been wheezy! LOL

I would be interested in some Alpaca porn...

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"The female sits while the male is doing his business."


Now, because I know better, I am going to ignore that last statement......




:p

I don't know if anyone in my family would count as normal. But we do have fun!

My boss was abit taken aback to hear laughter, hear funny stories and joking at my mother's funeral. But that was entirely in keeping with the person she was. And then said boss realized that if my father could smile, so could he, that it was okay. Ma would have approved.

He he he Nicole!!
That sounds very like phone chats Mum and I used to have...........I was going to put 'before she died' - but seeing as I've not had a chat since she died........I won't!!
Nice to be amongst like minded people - I don't think we're weird - it's everybody else!

Diane and myself now have daft conversations - and Jason hearing her side of it - rolls round the sofa laughing and kicking his legs in the air!! Cheeky devil!!

Like the saying goes:-

'I'll always be your Mother............................................ ........and you can't do a darn thing about it!!'

Lynne