It's official...

I'm the worst cook ever. :rolleyes::p:rolleyes:

So I attempted to complete the simple task of baking oatmeal chocolate chip cookies. And yes...I failed miserably. I don't think I've ever made a bigger mess of the kitchen. Plus, I managed to spill flour all over the counter and floor...and everything in between, including Zoey...Moose's whole back-end. Ay yi yi...I just spent the last 2 hours giving the dogs bathes...and the 2 hours before that baking those stupid cookies. And they weren't even good...I managed to burn the first two pans and was too sick from eating the dough and burnt cookies to enjoy the "successful" cookies I managed to make...without burning them.

It's times like these I find myself acting eerily similar to Jessica Simpson...an awful cook with not an ounce of common sense when it comes to anything "housewife" related...and Josh has reminded me of that plenty of times. :rolleyes:

I know, a pointless rant...but I need to vent to someone other than Josh. lol. :p

Awwww Brooke!

Here's my biggest secret about myself: I can't COOK and my BROTHER CAN COOK!

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Originally posted by CountryWolf07
Awwww Brooke!

Here's my biggest secret about myself: I can't COOK and my BROTHER CAN COOK!

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lol...well don't feel bad, because as I said...I can't either. Hm...my brother can cook too. What is that all about?? Ha...even Josh is a better cook than me...which is a good thing, because otherwise we would be eating out every night...or throwing something frozen into the microwave. :p

Hey, we can just rely on guys to cook for us!! ;)

This is why I flat-out refuse to cook! I mke my husband and kids do all of the cooking. When they whine about it, I remind them how awful my last attempt at burning... I mean cooking turned out.

Lucky for me, I've developd a fondness for burnt food over the years, so I don't mind when something turns out a little too well done, but everyone else wants to kill me! So I just don't cook:D

Moose,
I can't remember your age (heck, I can't even remember my own), but, cooking doesn't necessarily come natural to us. Practice, simple recipes that you get down pat, and following the directions will usually help.

I once made breakfast for my friend, we were having pancakes..do you hear me, pancakes. Well, it looked and felt and tasted like chicken breast. Don't ask me how. We took pictures it was so funny. We ate them, as maple syrup covers the taste of most anything. But, it was funny. Another time, I made this lovely pumpkin pie...lovely to look at, horrid to eat, unless you like pumpkin soup in a crust.

So, stick with it. Try those cookies again. The type of pan you use, and the accuracy of your oven WILL make a difference. Make them again! And, send me some, as I love them.

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Originally posted by Cataholic
Moose,
I can't remember your age (heck, I can't even remember my own), but, cooking doesn't necessarily come natural to us. Practice, simple recipes that you get down pat, and following the directions will usually help.

I once made breakfast for my friend, we were having pancakes..do you hear me, pancakes. Well, it looked and felt and tasted like chicken breast. Don't ask me how. We took pictures it was so funny. We ate them, as maple syrup covers the taste of most anything. But, it was funny. Another time, I made this lovely pumpkin pie...lovely to look at, horrid to eat, unless you like pumpkin soup in a crust.

So, stick with it. Try those cookies again. The type of pan you use, and the accuracy of your oven WILL make a difference. Make them again! And, send me some, as I love them.

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Well, I'm 21...so I'm not feeling too pressured to be skilled in the "culinary area." ;)

Thanks for letting me know I'm not alone though! :D

I'm also 21 and sadly my husband is too a better cook than I. I can cook a few things well, but not many. Justin is a computer programmer and enjoys cooking to relieve stress from work. When he comes home from work the last thing he wants to do is look at a screen, computer or tv, so he often cooks. I do like to cook and hope to improve with time.

I used to be a really horrible cook, but I LOVE cooking, so I've kept at it and my cooking has improved....except for breakfast food! I can't make a batch of edible pancakes to save my life!!

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Originally posted by WolfChan
I used to be a really horrible cook, but I LOVE cooking, so I've kept at it and my cooking has improved....except for breakfast food! I can't make a batch of edible pancakes to save my life!!

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Funny, since I refuse to cook, my kids have become really good at it. My son can whip up the best pancakes in town... better than any restaurant! Hey, get lucky like me and marry someone who likes to cook and then you can sit and be served all the time;)

Brooke, practice...alot! I used to practice while my husband was at work, when we first married. I could make the best creamed potatoes and roasts. BUT I had never made homemade biscuits. So while hubby was at work, I would practice. Of course I threw out a lot of those 'practice biscuits', had to be careful when throwing them out, because we had chickens running lose out in our yard, I swear if I had hit one of those poor chickens, it would have killed it. It would have been like throwing a rather large STONE at them.

Johanna, I made a Pumpkin pie one time, forgot to put the sugar in. It tasted very salty! Now everybody teases me and ask if I put the sugar in, I always say yeah I put the sugar in, but I think I used Cayenne pepper instead of the Cinnamon. LOL, I will have to really do that sometime..then turn the water off and watch the fun.;)

Willie

Find a simple recipe, and practice. Honest. Anyone who can read can bake. It just takes practice. Find a simple peanut butter cookie recipe - those the dogs can eat if they aren't human-tasty! :)

Karen, when I made the biscuits, my dogs even turned their nose up at them!

But practice does help, I can make a really good biscuit now!!

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Originally posted by trayi52
Of course I threw out a lot of those 'practice biscuits', had to be careful when throwing them out, because we had chickens running lose out in our yard, I swear if I had hit one of those poor chickens, it would have killed it. It would have been like throwing a rather large STONE at them.

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OMG you almost killed me! Here I am enjoying my 20 minute internet time (I am cutting back time spent online) and I read this while eating my stirfry and I almost choked. That has got to be the funniest thing I have heard in a long time. I just cannot stop laughing. That is halarious! :D

Thankfully I can cook. Obvioulsy if I just made stirfry. But like others here, I cannot for the life of me make a frickin pancake. I don't know what it is, but I just can't do it. Either it gets burnt, or it's just wet and slimey and totally sickening LOL.

Now if you asked me to make rack of lamb, grilled salmon or lasagna I can do that. My dad was a chef and taught me well. :D

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Originally posted by trayi52
Karen, when I made the biscuits, my dogs even turned their nose up at them!

But practice does help, I can make a really good biscuit now!!

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Yeah, but I bet those not-even-dog-edible ones were great for street hockey ...

Brooke, honey, when you are ready to try again, let me know. I'll email you an easy recipe with step by step instructions.

In my family, we all start our baking careers at the age of four, stirring the dough to make gingerbread men at Christmastime. It's pretty darned bullet-proof dough, no eggs or anything tricky about it, and Ma would put all the ingrediants in a very big, deep bowl, and hand over a wooden spoon. I remember standing on a chair stirring with both hands on the spoon handle, with my big sister helping me. Repeat the same scene 5 years later, and it was me helping my little brother!

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Originally posted by Karen
Yeah, but I bet those not-even-dog-edible ones were great for street hockey ...

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Karen,

Have you ever taken a biscuit-puck off the shins???


They hurt!!:D

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Originally posted by RICHARD
Karen,

Have you ever taken a biscuit-puck off the shins???


They hurt!!:D

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Hey, remember, I have BROTHERS! A biscuit puck in the shins can't hurt any worse than an accidental hockey stick off the shins - which in turn didn't hurt as much as the falls I took all on my own, no pucks or sticks intervening at all.

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Originally posted by Karen
Hey, remember, I have BROTHERS! A biscuit puck in the shins can't hurt any worse than an accidental hockey stick off the shins - which in turn didn't hurt as much as the falls I took all on my own, no pucks or sticks intervening at all.

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Touche'

:)

Yes Karen, but they weren't using MY practice homemade biscuits!! They were real killer biscuits...

Practice makes perfect. :D

I don't cook *too much* but do pretty well in whatever I do make, whenever I make it. I made carrot cake yesterday........turned out pretty good. Everyone loved it. I do well on rice, broiled chicken, cakes, cookies, stir fried vegetables, pizza, lasagna, etc. What I'm horrible at is this traditional *tortilla-like* bread we make, which is quite easy actually, but I CANNOT make it a circle! :rolleyes: No matter what I do, it turns out to be the shape of some different continent every time. My dad cannot help but laugh when he sees it. It tastes *ok* (not like my mom's but *OK..........just OK*), but it looks WIERD. Sometimes its Africa, sometimes Asia, sometimes North America, sometimes, some other continent...........but NEVER a circle, like its supposed to be! Get's frustrating. Oh well...........I'm still young. I'll learn, AND SO WILL YOU!!! :p

And.........I would like to add, my brother started cooking before me, and honestly, I only started because I felt bad about my brother cooking, and not me!!! Guess this runs in families? ;)

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Originally posted by Karen
Brooke, honey, when you are ready to try again, let me know. I'll email you an easy recipe with step by step instructions.

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Karen I would love that!! Thank you so much. I need all the help I can get. :D:o

I can only make Ramen Noodles and Macaroni and Cheese on the stove, so don't feel bad. :o

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Originally posted by Moose
Karen I would love that!! Thank you so much. I need all the help I can get. :D:o

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Okay, when you're ready to try again, send me a PM a day ahead of time. I promise extra-easy instructions and recipe, okay? Everybody's a beginner sometimes!

Homemade hockey pucks!! Yup, I used to be able to make those too.

Never give up unless you just absolutely hate the kitchen.

An easy can't mess up meal is a salad with chicken. I cut up romaine lettuce (or you can get it already cut) and put it in a large bowl. I get boneless- skinless chicken strips and sprinkle lemon-herb seasoning on them and cook them in the oven (follow cooking instructions on package of chicken for temperature and cook time). Cut up the chicken into chunks and add it to the bowl of lettuce. Shred cheese, as much as you want and any kind you want. I use "Heluva Good Cheese- extra sharp wash curd". www.heluvagood.com/cheese.htm. I then add "McCormick Salad Toppins". Mix everything together and add dressing of choice (I use ranch) and croutons if you want. It is so easy and fool proof. It's one of my and my husbands favorite thing to make and eat.

Moose, I love that doggie in your sig!! He's (?) so cute!:D

haha me too. I saw him and started laughing. :):D