OK, what now?

Guys, I need more advice!

Connor has now been in the house for 5 days(in a separate room). I have been doing the towel-rubbing daily.

Two days ago they managed to get into the same room together, Connor approached Ally, who screamed like she was being murdered, and TRIED to swat Connor. Connor TRIED to swat back (notice neither of them appears to have made contact - not exactly Ninja Cats are they???) Connor then went and hid under the bed in his room, and Ally hid behind the washing machine :rolleyes: There does not seem to be any clear "dominant" cat emerging - they are both big scardey-cats

Today, whilst at home on sick leave *ahem* I put them on either side of my glass sliding door (between the games room and kitchen). I cracked it open a couple of inches and wedged it with a screwdriver. Then I fed them ham, inches apart, on either side of the door. They just ate the food and moved away - no swatting or hissing. In fact , NO reaction at all. They are totally ignoring each other.

When will I know the time is right to let them in the same room together??? I don't want to rush things, but sooner or later they will have to co-exist in this house!

Your expert advice is, as always, appreciated!

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Originally posted by Ally Cat's Mommy
Guys, I need more advice!

Connor has now been in the house for 5 days(in a separate room). ... Today, whilst at home on sick leave *ahem* I put them on either side of my glass sliding door (between the games room and kitchen). I cracked it open a couple of inches and wedged it with a screwdriver. Then I fed them ham, inches apart, on either side of the door. They just ate the food and moved away - no swatting or hissing. In fact , NO reaction at all. They are totally ignoring each other.

When will I know the time is right to let them in the same room together??? I don't want to rush things, but sooner or later they will have to co-exist in this house!

Your expert advice is, as always, appreciated!

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WOW! That is progress! No reaction at all! Good work! They aren't ignoring each other, even though it appears that way. Give it a few more days and then try a supervised visit - aim for 5-10 minutes, although it probably won't last that long. Mishi and Mitzi's first encounter was about 30 seconds - a very memorable 30 seconds .... Mitzi swished by Mishi giving him the best of all her voluptuous girliness ... he definitely noticed, and then she sashayed past again, turning to glare at him. What a gal! :rolleyes:

Slowly increase the daily supervised visits. After they can tolerate each other for about an hour with no fur flying, then try some unsupervised visits. My first day at work leaving them alone together, I was a nervous wreck, but all was well. It does take time. I was amazed at how long it took my two, but it was worth taking the time to make the introductions. Now Mishi is totally in love with Mitzi; Mitzi just tolerates the big goon. :rolleyes: :p

I'm no cat expert - but I'd like to hear how it all turns out! Good luck and I'll be thinking about you!

Each introduction goes differently. It took 3 weeks with Thumper and Butterscotch. 2 weeks with Skinny. In the end you will know just how they are acting that being in the same room is ok. There is going to be lots of hissing, grawling, swatting (I love the swats in the air method LOL). They know each other exists. They can pick up your vibes, I would be near by but not in eye shot when they are exploring each other. If your tense they pick up on it, I found this out when we introduced Skinny to the gang. He was so small I thought Butterscotch and Thumper would sit on him. LOL I would have a water bottle handy but I would leave the room and let them explore. Everyone is getting along just fine.
Make sure you fuss over Ally, she is feeling like Conner is invading.

Gotta run, Skinny is playing to hard and jumping on Thumper of all places in the bath room. Gotta put my Ref outfit on. LOL

Good luck :)

Thanks RedHedd. Good advice! BTW Mitzi sounds like a real TEASE!!

Thanks to stacwase and Craftlady too! (By the way Butterscotch is gorgeous!)

I think the key is patiences. I also think RedHedd gave some good advice.

Have you ever heard of the vanilla extract trick? I've read it works great. Just rub some on your hands and then rub each cat with your hands especially behind the ears. This is suppose to make both cats smell the same so they don't feel intimidated. I've never tried it but thought seriously about doing it with Scout and Ripley when they first met.

MMMMMMmmmm - Valilla Extract - will it help them "Make Biscuits" LOL


Thanks - I'll try it.

I have now swopped them over - I have Ally on the Kitchen and scullery (where she usually sleeps), and Connor has the run of the rest of the house again. Tonight I'll put Connor back in HIS room and let Ally sleep where she wants (which will be in the bed with me.......shhhhh - don't tell daddy - he gets back tomorrow)

5 days and no killing, sounds good to me. (by the way, if they wanted to reach each other in the slapping fight, they would have. It's just posturing) I'd give them a supervised visit. Just be there, don't expect miracles, but give them some time together with you ever present. Report back and we will analyze the findings...(hee hee, how scientific)

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Originally posted by Ally Cat's Mommy
Thanks RedHedd. Good advice! BTW Mitzi sounds like a real TEASE!!

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LOL She sure is! When she pours on the "full Mitzi" no male cat would be safe. :rolleyes:

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Originally posted by jenluckenbach
5 days and no killing, sounds good to me.

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he he.

New cat introductions fun and tricky at the same time. :)

I agree with Jen, if they wanted to fight they would do.

When you let them have a supervised visit, try not to worry or interfer. (I made the first couple of introductions harder by doing both.)

The cats pick up on your mood, if you think they'll get on, it is more relaxing atmosphere.

Don't interfer, even if one cat is being mean to the other, they have to find a pecking order, better that they do that with supervision. Only worry if you see claws out and blood on the floor ;)

Good Luck, waiting for next update.

Well, it's 12:35AM here, so I need to get some shut-eye, otherwise I am going to be totally useless at work tomorrow.

To end my evening on a positive note...Connor just spent the past 10 minutes laying in my lap getting a tummy rub! What a boy!!!!!

When I adopted Sky, he spent a week in my spare bedroom. I would let him out for brief periods only when I was there. The introductions went very smoothly and now all 3 of my other cats love him. :) I'm sure that in time both Ally and Connor will get along or at least learn to tolerate each other. Good luck and please keep us updated. :)

This sounds good to me and I agree with everybody: if they wanted to fight they would. And of course they are not ignoring each other. they just play it cool:cool:

Good to hear that Connor already wants tummyrubs. He knows he has arrived at his furever place:)

No bloodshed??? I'd say let them out while SUPERVISED. See what happens. You did the right thing by feeding them together. It's a pleasant experience that shows them everything is okay.

Keep on doing what you're doing cuz you're obviously doing something right! And keep us posted.

Five days??? Eddie is entering his fifth month here and we still have good days and bad days. Yesterday was a good day --- they sleep on the same bed, Edwina walked past Eddie without swatting him. Today isn't a good day. She started in on him at 5:00 this morning when they went downstairs with my husband for breakfast. I could hear her hissing and growling and him crying.

Odd thing though....when they came back upstairs he was following her -- even though she was still in a swatting mood!

Feeding together is a good idea. Even though it is a "dog thing" I always give Edwina her treats first.

I'll have to go back and look. I think it was at least a month before I stopped worry about bloodshed! Heck, it was more than five days before Eddie came out from under the furniture! So you are making great progress!

Yes, sounds like you're doing something right, especially after reading Eddie's story collapsed into a few sentences. But I think what's most important in Eddie's story is the good day/bad day thing. I believe that will continue forever, because it's that way in my house too, after T & P being together for 15 years now! :eek:

Please keep us updated, and if I remember right, hubby was coming home today with the camera, right? ;) :D

This thread has really got me thinking !!! I was considering getting Bonnie a wee friend as I can tell how much she misses her brother Jock. I'm not to sure now as all of you more experienced cat lovers talk about keeping them in seperate rooms at the start. That would be totally impossible for me as I only have a small flat with no spare room :confused:

Also do you reckon that another boy would be better for Bonnie or would 2 girl cats get on ??? And another question, should I consider a kitten or an older rescue cat ??

Now don't get too excited as I am only considering it
;)

My parents think I'm mad to think about cos they say Bonnie will get used to being alone, I must admit she does like the extra attention as Jock was a very demanding boy and would push her out the way when she was being cuddled (he was my big cuddly baby who loved his meowmie tons!!)

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Originally posted by sqwelch
This thread has really got me thinking !!! I was considering getting Bonnie a wee friend as I can tell how much she misses her brother Jock. I'm not to sure now as all of you more experienced cat lovers talk about keeping them in seperate rooms at the start. That would be totally impossible for me as I only have a small flat with no spare room :confused:

Also do you reckon that another boy would be better for Bonnie or would 2 girl cats get on ??? And another question, should I consider a kitten or an older rescue cat ??

Now don't get too excited as I am only considering it
;)

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I've heard that it's easier to introduce a cat of the opposite sex to the resident cat. As I only have experience with introducing Mishi to Mitzi and was warned that introducing another female to Mitzi would be difficult, not sure I can help you there. I have a teeny, tiny one-bedroom apartment and it was difficult keeping them separated, but somehow I managed for a whole two weeks or so. Poor Mishi lived in the bathroom for his first couple of weeks with us and I'd lock Mitzi in the bedroom so he could get a feel for the place and leave his scent where Mitzi would smell it. It wasn't an ideal situation, but I knew it wasn't forever.

Not sure about the kitten vs. older cat thing. I opted for a grown cat as I know the rescue shelters have a more difficult time rehoming them. HTH

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Originally posted by sqwelch
I'm not to sure now as all of you more experienced cat lovers talk about keeping them in seperate rooms at the start. That would be totally impossible for me as I only have a small flat with no spare room :confused:

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What about new cat stays locked in your bedroom ? (More comfortable than a bathroom) That way he/she will have your company at night.

I wouldn't get a young kitten, maybe an older calmer kitten or an adult would be easier to settle. But this opinion is only as I recently have found out how much work a kitten takes.

I have 4 boys and 2 girls, I find the boy to boy introductions the easiest ones, with the Girl to Girl introductions being the worst (Overall)

But seeing as the cat chooses you not the other way around, I would go to the shelter and see who decides to come home with you. :D

I have twin brown tabbies, male and female, and I rescued a young kitten in June. He was quarantined in our bathroom in a cozy nest until tests proved he was healthy, then he was able to have contact with the outside bathroom door and reach his little paw under the door to the 2 staring kitties outside. This let them get used to the smell and the fact that there was another kitty in the house. The big day that we introduced them was all caught on tape. My female cat gave lots of attitude and just observed while my male cat was more curious and "introduced himself" and sniffed a lot. I could tell my female was intimidated because she thought that he would get all of our attention and she demands a lot of it! From then on we did daily short supervised visits with my fiance and I. That progressed to leaving him out all day with them while we were at work and only putting him in the bathroom at night. We continued that way for a long time because I could tell my cats, at a year and a half, appreciated the break from the rambunctious kitten who enjoyed wrestling. Eventually they stayed out 24 hours a day together and seemed to do fine. They had no choice but to be together all day when we went on vacation to Hawaii for a week, we didn't want to leave him in the bathroom that whole time and make our cat sitter let him out twice a day.

Each cat, as you know, has it's own personality and each will react differently to each situation. I agree with everyone else's comments though about introducing them slowly and getting them used to the idea of each other though. They may eventually cuddle or just tolerate each other and not like each other, but only time will tell. My kitten and boy cat like to chase each other and wrestle and I have caught them all laying together on the bed before, so I know it's possible. My girl cat still owns the place but is very tolerant. All it takes is time, and we're still working on it. I am interested to see their chemistry when my kitten grows out of his kitten stage too. Good luck!

If all goes well, I will be attaching a picture of the 3 of them caught on the bed together, it was so cute!

Lallypop11 - cute picture! I'd love to see more of your gang.

I agree with Moosmom. I think supervised meetings would be good. If Ally get's scared and hides, just let Conner get a feel for his new home while she's in hiding. It'll get her used to the fact there's a new kitty in her life. :)

It'll take a while as its usually on the resident's cat's terms.

sqwelch,
In my opinion, a male kitten would be an easier introduction. You can keep him in your bathroom when Bonnie is overly annoyed...and when she needs some extra attention. :)